Not That Far From A Star

I woke to a slight stiffness in my neck. I must have slept on it wrong. I yawn and stretch as normal but a groan was added shortly because I neck locked up in a spasm. I cringe as I try to stretch the kink out . I lay my hand down next to where Andy should be but he’s not there. I stop moving my neck and open my eyes finally and notice him standing by the window. I watch him as he stares out into the sky, looking over the city buildings.

As I watch him, I notice how beautiful he really is. His sculpted arms crossing over his toned, naked chest, his wide shoulder leaning on the window seal. His slender but toned waist, the deep V that leads down. His strong cheek bones and jaw line. Those gorgeous eyes anybody could lose themselves in, and of course last but not least those thin lips that cause the fieriest sparks to flash behind my eyelids when on my own.

I quietly creep up behind him though I know he can hear me from being a damned angel and all. I come from behind and wrap my small arms around his waist tightly. I bring my lips lightly upon his tanned back, leaving sweet kisses then laying my forehead against his bare back. I feel him tense for a moment. I look up noticing that his hair is darker than normal though it’s dark but, it’s not usually that dark. He turns around in my arms and it’s not Andy. I let go from his waist slightly but stayed just as close for some reason, I just couldn’t get my body to move.

“Damion, what are you doing here?” I asked a little startled. After figuring out it wasn’t Andy, I was now hoping that Damion didn’t take the kiss more than intended. “I had to see you.” he answered, glancing down at me, moving closer enough for me his warm silky breath on my lips, closing the little gap we had between us already. “I’m sorry Lea…” he said with hurt in his eyes.

I stare into those gorgeous secluded brown eyes as his face inches closer to my lips and I could tell he was asking if it was alright with his eyes. I was telling myself in my head no, that this wasn’t okay. But my body of course rejected every word and said “You know what? I’m going to have fun so fuck you brain!”

Finally feeling his lips slowly meet mine sweet, I pause for a moment at first but the kiss grew so much more intense. I wrapped my arms around his neck pulling him in even closer than we already were. He turned us around , me not even noticing because of the highly addictive kissing going on. I felt my back push against the wall as he gripped my thighs, pulling my off the floor, me automatically wrapping my legs around his lower waist.

The kissing was increasing and I could feel his hard on through his jeans as he pressed me up harder against the wall. As our kissing started to slow down for some reason, I could feel Damion hesitantly pull away from my lips and lay his forehead against mine. His breathing was heavy and I didn’t notice mine was until we quit kissing. I took in a deep breath as I felt the sorrow he has on the tip of tongue. I glanced into his eyes finally, pressing my palm against his cheek as he leaned for another kiss which was just a simple peck but he lingered for a few moments. After looking into my eyes, he sighed a quiet “Sorry” that confused me.

As he gripped my waist and led us to the bed, leaning down on the bed with me now laying down propped on my elbows as he crawled on his knees leaning down on top of me, I held his gaze the whole time. I shook my head as I could see the guilt creep behind his eyes. “Damion, no.” I said pressing my palm against his chest, slowly grazing my nails against his toned chest. I could hear him grunt but I couldn’t help but giggle slightly. He grabbed my hand and laid it back down on the bed. He looked at me and started to kiss the side of my mouth down to my jaw to my neck to my somewhat exposed chest since I only had my bra on and jeans, then down to my navel. He left sweet kisses everywhere as I was trying so hard not to let him take me, here and now.

I lead his head back up to my lips as I fully lay down, pulling him down on top of me now. I felt his hands roam around my curves that I was so self-conscious about. I smile into kiss as he smirks for some odd reason but I soon find out. He grinds against me slightly as I feel what I’ve caused again and I’m not totally turned away. Actually, it got me pretty excited too. I scraped my nails down his back as he let out a low groan which of course turned me on even more.

As the physical exploring started getting more crazier, I had this nagging voice in the back of my mind saying “Andy” that whole time. When I finally took the voice in, I pushed my hand against Damion’s chest feeling so confused. Damion automatically stopped kissing me and looked into my eyes as I stared into his. When he looked into mine, grief and guilt struck his eyes and the lust disappeared. I felt his hand rub against my cheek, feeling something wet. I didn’t even know I started crying.

“Damion. I’m so sorry. I can’t do this.” I pushed him off a little more as I sat up against the headboard and he sat across from me. He looked at me as I brought my legs to my chest, hugging them closely. I felt him shift on the bed and noticed he was now sitting on the edge with his head in his hands. I looked at his back arching slightly like Andy’s did when he was agitated with thinking to himself. I sighed to myself now knowing why everything between Damion and I ever happened.

I climb off the bed and sit down on my knees in front of Damion while he’s still facing his head down. I lift his chin up slightly took look down at me. I place my palms on the side of his face, closing the gap between us with his legs on either side of me. He places his palms on the side of my cheeks as well. “I know about Elissia, yet I still kissed you didn’t I?” he looked into my eyes, shocked that I knew about her, how I could possibly speak of her name. He searched my eyes as to where I was suppose to be going. “But…” I sigh. “I’m not your Elissia. Damion. I love you. I really do, but I’m not ‘in love’ with you.” I saw disappointment along with relief. But when I looked even harder, I saw hope die slowly as whatever he was thinking could happen between us and to tell you the truth, I think my hope died as well and I think he knew that because he kissed me quickly again.

As he glanced in my eyes again, I saw the same sorrow I use to when I first met him, like he was soon going to regret something. He rubs his thumbs against my cheeks slowly as I dropped my hands to his denim covered knees as I leaned into his left palm feeling the warmth radiating off of it. He slowly moved closer to my lips and kissed them, lingering of course like he always did, and nipped my lip with a whisper against them. Of course not thinking I would know what he said, but I did. I knew it and I was going to keep that secret to my heart forever. He loved me. He admitted it and said it to me. That’s something I will forever cherish.

“I’m sorry.” he says after letting go of our kiss and dropping his hands to his knee’s where mine we’re currently laying. I stare into his gorgeous green eyes, feeling lost. I felt like reaching for him again but my hand wouldn’t move. I try again to move my hand but I never move from my position. As I think about why I can’t get myself to move, I think of the power Andy told me about, compulsion. Of course!

‘He wouldn’t do this to me, would he? He’s using compulsion on me! I wish I could smack him right now!’ I think of this all at once until I finally here a snicker in my head, but it wasn’t my laugh, it was Damion’s. So I shout inside of my head to possibly get him to hear me. “I hate you! I can’t believe I trusted you, believed you dammit! I’m so stupid!” I was fuming obviously. I heard him finally sigh and answer. “That’s what you get for not listening to a damn thing I’ve apologized for. You should hate me Lea. Elissia should have hated me as well, but of course you women can’t stop drawing me in with your…ways!!!” he yelled which caused my head to throb at the noise.

‘Your full of such Bull shit Damion! You pulled me in, remember?” I yell annoyed with how was making this seem like it was my fault. “You don’t think I feel horrible for having to do this to you? Lea, I’m practically in love with you but, I, Andy needs to learn how it feels…” he responded quietly, even solemnly.

“I love you too, Damion! But, I can’t change how I feel about Andy! Please don’t do this!” I stuttered, shocked that he actually was thinking about killing me. “Damion, I love you, I will always and forever. Please believe me?” I say confidently, because it was true and I knew it would strike a nerve for him to lose a little control on his compulsion. I slowly dip into unconciousness from Damion’s stong hold on my mind. As I fade out, I hear him whisper with sadness in his voice.

“I love you as well, my little Eli.”