Let the Walls Break Down
You're Not Going To Have A Panic Attack On Me Are You?
Everyone around me watched horrified as Kirstie went down. Josh, Todd, and I instantly started running towards her. When we finally made it, the medics were already loading her into an ambulance.
“We have to go… now,” Todd said in voice full of authority.
No one questioned him. All three of us hurried to his truck. No words were said as Todd drove to the hospital. I was so worried though. Todd noticed and removed one of his hands from the steering wheel to hold my hand in his. I looked over at him and flashed a weak smile that he returned.
If I was freaking out this much, I could only imagine how Josh was doing. I chanced a look back at him in the passenger mirror. His head was in his hand. I wanted to reach over and hug him, but… that wasn’t really possibly since we were in a truck.
Once we got therein record time, Josh led us inside. He asked for Kirstie’s room and they told us to wait in the waiting room. Is this good? Why do I have a feeling that it’s not?
I sat next to Todd and leaned forward, rubbing my hands over my face. He leaned over and rubbed my back gently. I wanted to cry right now… but I couldn’t. Josh was sitting across from me and when I looked up, he looked like he was about to lose it himself.
Without saying anything, I got up and walked over towards Josh. He didn’t even look up at me. I didn’t care though. I still pulled him into a tight hug that I feel like he desperately needed.
“It will be ok, Josh,” I whispered to him once he wrapped his own arms around me.
He replied by sighing heavily. I could cry from just seeing how Josh was reacting. Once we parted, his soft brown eyes were glossy. Aw, poor Joshie.
“I need to see her,” he said softly with his eyes staying on the ground.
“You’ll be the first one to go in there, Josh. I promise. As soon as they say anyone can go in, you go,” I told him.
He nodded his head slowly and continued to stare at the ground. I frowned at him and gave his knee a slight squeeze before I went back over to Todd. He gave me a small smile and opened up his arms to me. I gladly accepted and fell into his lap with his arms hooked tightly around me.
All three of us sat in the waiting room in pure silence. I hated it! Not only was I bored, but… I was so worried about Kirstie. we hadn’t herd anything about her in forty-five minutes. What is going on?
To try and occupy my mind from the horrible thoughts that were going through it, I started playing with Todd’s wedding band. I’ve noticed I do this whenever I’m stressed about something and he’s comforting me. He’s started doing it to me now too. It’s so cute.
“I’m worried about Josh,” I whispered to him, making sure that Josh couldn’t hear.
“He’ll be fine. Just give him some time,” he whispered back so cutely… He actually made me smile and kiss his yummy plump lips.
We sat there for a few more minutes. Finally, someone came out and said we could go see Kirstie. I didn’t even have to look at Josh to tell him to go. He was already half way down the hall to her room. I sighed and sat up from Todd’s arms.
“I need to go on a walk. I can’t stay here much longer,” I pushed out while taking in deep breaths.
I hate hospitals so much. I get wicked anxiety if I’m in them for long periods of time. But it looks like I need to get used to it if Kirstie’s going to be staying here… I hope she doesn’t have to. The doctor didn’t really say anything so… I can only hope.
“I’ll come with you, babe,” he said softly while standing and following me outside.
If I had picked up the smoking habit, I would be sucking down a whole pack right now. Wow, I’m really stressed out huh? But before I could freak out anymore, Todd wrapped his warm arms around my waist from behind. Have I ever mentioned that I love this man?
“You’re not going to have a panic attack on me are you?” he asked with a smile in his voice.
“No… I don’t think… yet anyway,” I teased while smiling up at him.
“You worry me sometimes,” he softly said while resting his chin on my shoulder.
“Why?” I asked with my forehead wrinkled up in confusion.
“I don’t know. I just feel like you hold stuff in until it really bothers you and it’s like ten times worse than what it really is… and the only person that can get it out of you is me,” he replied; his voice growing softer towards the end.
Slowly, I turned around to look up at him. I didn’t want to admit, but… he was right… I just didn’t want to admit it at all.
“I’m not saying it’s a bad thing… I love being around you… obviously,” he smiled his full bright grin that always makes me weak at the knees.
“You’re amazing, Toddie,” I sighed joyously with a smile and rested my head on his chest.
“I know,” he smirked.Cocky butthead.
He got a kiss out of it though… a yummy one too. Well, yummy for me. I can only assume that it was yummy for him… Anyway, he took my hand and walked around the hospital.
I felt better just holding Todd’s hand… and being out of that stupid waiting room. But I do hope Kirstie’s fine… and her JG. I hate to think this, but… I couldn’t imagine how Josh would react if something serious happened to Kirstie. But it will be ok…or so I keep telling myself.
“We have to go… now,” Todd said in voice full of authority.
No one questioned him. All three of us hurried to his truck. No words were said as Todd drove to the hospital. I was so worried though. Todd noticed and removed one of his hands from the steering wheel to hold my hand in his. I looked over at him and flashed a weak smile that he returned.
If I was freaking out this much, I could only imagine how Josh was doing. I chanced a look back at him in the passenger mirror. His head was in his hand. I wanted to reach over and hug him, but… that wasn’t really possibly since we were in a truck.
Once we got therein record time, Josh led us inside. He asked for Kirstie’s room and they told us to wait in the waiting room. Is this good? Why do I have a feeling that it’s not?
I sat next to Todd and leaned forward, rubbing my hands over my face. He leaned over and rubbed my back gently. I wanted to cry right now… but I couldn’t. Josh was sitting across from me and when I looked up, he looked like he was about to lose it himself.
Without saying anything, I got up and walked over towards Josh. He didn’t even look up at me. I didn’t care though. I still pulled him into a tight hug that I feel like he desperately needed.
“It will be ok, Josh,” I whispered to him once he wrapped his own arms around me.
He replied by sighing heavily. I could cry from just seeing how Josh was reacting. Once we parted, his soft brown eyes were glossy. Aw, poor Joshie.
“I need to see her,” he said softly with his eyes staying on the ground.
“You’ll be the first one to go in there, Josh. I promise. As soon as they say anyone can go in, you go,” I told him.
He nodded his head slowly and continued to stare at the ground. I frowned at him and gave his knee a slight squeeze before I went back over to Todd. He gave me a small smile and opened up his arms to me. I gladly accepted and fell into his lap with his arms hooked tightly around me.
All three of us sat in the waiting room in pure silence. I hated it! Not only was I bored, but… I was so worried about Kirstie. we hadn’t herd anything about her in forty-five minutes. What is going on?
To try and occupy my mind from the horrible thoughts that were going through it, I started playing with Todd’s wedding band. I’ve noticed I do this whenever I’m stressed about something and he’s comforting me. He’s started doing it to me now too. It’s so cute.
“I’m worried about Josh,” I whispered to him, making sure that Josh couldn’t hear.
“He’ll be fine. Just give him some time,” he whispered back so cutely… He actually made me smile and kiss his yummy plump lips.
We sat there for a few more minutes. Finally, someone came out and said we could go see Kirstie. I didn’t even have to look at Josh to tell him to go. He was already half way down the hall to her room. I sighed and sat up from Todd’s arms.
“I need to go on a walk. I can’t stay here much longer,” I pushed out while taking in deep breaths.
I hate hospitals so much. I get wicked anxiety if I’m in them for long periods of time. But it looks like I need to get used to it if Kirstie’s going to be staying here… I hope she doesn’t have to. The doctor didn’t really say anything so… I can only hope.
“I’ll come with you, babe,” he said softly while standing and following me outside.
If I had picked up the smoking habit, I would be sucking down a whole pack right now. Wow, I’m really stressed out huh? But before I could freak out anymore, Todd wrapped his warm arms around my waist from behind. Have I ever mentioned that I love this man?
“You’re not going to have a panic attack on me are you?” he asked with a smile in his voice.
“No… I don’t think… yet anyway,” I teased while smiling up at him.
“You worry me sometimes,” he softly said while resting his chin on my shoulder.
“Why?” I asked with my forehead wrinkled up in confusion.
“I don’t know. I just feel like you hold stuff in until it really bothers you and it’s like ten times worse than what it really is… and the only person that can get it out of you is me,” he replied; his voice growing softer towards the end.
Slowly, I turned around to look up at him. I didn’t want to admit, but… he was right… I just didn’t want to admit it at all.
“I’m not saying it’s a bad thing… I love being around you… obviously,” he smiled his full bright grin that always makes me weak at the knees.
“You’re amazing, Toddie,” I sighed joyously with a smile and rested my head on his chest.
“I know,” he smirked.Cocky butthead.
He got a kiss out of it though… a yummy one too. Well, yummy for me. I can only assume that it was yummy for him… Anyway, he took my hand and walked around the hospital.
I felt better just holding Todd’s hand… and being out of that stupid waiting room. But I do hope Kirstie’s fine… and her JG. I hate to think this, but… I couldn’t imagine how Josh would react if something serious happened to Kirstie. But it will be ok…or so I keep telling myself.