She Was The Challenge He'd Been Waiting For.

“Honey, what’s on your mind?” Mrs. Randall asked as the two sat beside each other, getting their nails prepared for color.

Isabella just stared at the woman filing her nails, trying to think past the guilt that she’d put upon herself after Alex left. He was right. This is what couples do, and she should be reciprocating. But she wasn’t sure she could.

She hadn’t even kissed anyone until him, how could she ever do anything like that? She cared about him a lot, and she wanted him to be happy. She was a bit confused about the whole thing. She wasn’t sure if she could do the things that Alex expected. She just wanted to hold hands and kiss, why did it have to be so complicated?

“Honey?”

Isabella sighed, looking over at her mom with a guilty expression as if she’d gotten caught doing something dirty.

“Thinking about Alex?” She smiled, knowingly. “He’s a nice boy, Izy. He seems to really care about you.”

“Yeah.” She spoke quietly, unsure of what to say.

Mrs. Randall didn’t know what was up with her daughter. Isabella was usually so happy, and so excitable. She and Alex were basically attached to the hip, so something must have happened between them. She’d been reluctant to see him, and then when he did come over, she didn’t seem thrilled about it.

She and her husband were so protective over Isabella, especially since they’d lost Travis. Alex knew better than to break her heart. He was a nice boy, and both she and Isabella’s father had approved of him. He wouldn’t hurt Isabella, so what happened?

“Did something happen, sweetie?”

Isabella sighed. “Mom, I just don’t want to talk about Alex right now, okay?”

Her daughter didn’t snap. She didn’t talk back to her mother. It really caught Mrs. Randall off guard, but if Isabella didn’t want to discuss Alex, then they didn’t have to. She had to respect that she couldn’t shelter her daughter from the world any longer. But the truth was that she did have her concerns about Alex.

From their sessions, she knew a bit about him, and it didn’t seem like the type of boy who should be with her baby. But she was giving him the benefit of the doubt. He knew that Isabella was different. That she was a special case unlike any other girl. He wasn’t stupid enough to try anything.

“So what color are you going to go with?” Her mother pressed.

“I… I was thinking purple.”

“Purple?” Mrs. Randall asked quietly, looking over at the dark shade of violet that her daughter had picked out.

That wasn’t her Isabella. Isabella always chose crazy colors, happy ones and sparkly ones that were outlandish. Yellow, in fact, was her favorite color because it was so happy, and sunny. Even if she’d chosen a bright purple, it’d be fine, but the shade she chose wasn’t far from black, it was so dark. Perhaps she was reading too much into a simple style choice. She was a psychologist, and while her daughter was a patient, maybe now wasn’t the time to psychoanalyze her every move.

Isabella picked at her lunch, seeming to be too caught up in her thoughts to entertain her mother in conversation.

She figured that maybe she should discuss her reluctance to engage in the acts that Alex had put before her. She cared about him; she liked him a lot, but he seemed to expect things from her. She couldn’t help but be a little uncomfortable with what he’d offered.

All Isabella wanted was a nice boy to listen to her, and hold her. She didn’t seem to understand that Alex would tire of that. That plenty of girls would jump at the chance to be on their knees before him. Or in bed with him.

But Isabella wasn’t like other girls. She didn’t seem to understand that, but her mother had told Alex specifically that her Isabella wasn’t like other girls her age. He had to know better than to toy with her as he was.

“Is this about Travis?” Her mother spoke quietly.

Mentioning her brother caused Isabella’s eyes to begin to water.

“Honey, you haven’t been the same since-“

She wiped her tears before they could spill.

Isabella had done enough crying over her brother. She didn’t need to be reminded any further. How would her mother assume that her relationship with Alex had anything to do with her deceased brother?

“Are you trying to fill his void by having Alex in your life?” Her mother went into psychologist mode.

Isabella hated that more than anything. Her mother couldn’t just be a mother and let her daughter sort things out herself. She had to meddle in Isabella’s life. She had to fix her daughter; had to control her more than ever.

The truth was that Isabella didn’t need to be controlled. She needed to be reminded to do simple things, and to have things placed before her, but she didn’t need her mother making assumptions like that.

She missed Travis terribly, but that had nothing to do with Alex. They had both lost a sibling, and that had brought them together. He wasn’t filling the massive void that Travis had left, because no one ever could.

Her brother had been her best friend and her hero; no one could be that for her. Just as Alex missed Daniel terribly, and still had a bit of troubling coping, so was Isabella. They had gotten together in hopes of helping one another. But her mother didn’t seem to know that.

Not everything broken could be fixed. Isabella didn’t feel broken, as she continued to live, but her heart was fragmented. All she wanted was to find someone who made her hurt less noticeable. Alex allowed her to feel something other than loss. He made her happy most of the time. He made her feel all sorts of things that she’d never felt before.

“Mom,” Isabella spoke quietly. “It isn’t about Travis.”

The older woman nodded slowly, not totally sure if that was the truth, but if Isabella said so, she wouldn’t push any further.

The blonde didn’t think she could tell her mother what the problem actually was.

Her mother was a proper woman and would be disappointed in her daughter. She’d make a big deal about Isabella no longer being clean or being a lady because of what she’d allowed Alex to do. The girl hadn’t really known any better.

She’d never been given any form of sex talk. All she’d learned was through books, so she imagined the subject was rather taboo. It was not something a mother and daughter spoke of.

“You can tell me.” Mrs. Randall spoke, taking a sip of her coffee.

“I think I’m going to ask Kara over… if that’s alright.”

“Sure, honey. I think it’s so nice that you have a girlfriend like Kara. She’s a really sweet girl.”

Isabella nodded.

“So explain this to me. Alex goes down on you, makes you feel amazing and now you’re confused about whether its right or not.” The brunette asked, confused as ever.

“Its not… so simple.”

Kara smiled softly, folding her legs beneath her.

She didn’t understand Isabella’s concern and reluctance, but she was going to be as understanding as she could. Not that she wanted Alex, because she was perfectly happy with Rian, but she’d heard about Alex’s “talents.”

How could Isabella not be totally ecstatic about the whole thing? If Alex was so eager and willing, why wouldn’t she be as well? But Kara did have her concerns about Alex’s intentions with Isabella.

She was so sensitive, and innocent. Isabella was the type of girl Alex would want to ruin. He’d take everything from her… but he wouldn’t really do that, right? He wasn’t cruel. He was one of the best people she knew… wasn’t he? Kara didn’t want to think any less of him, but she did have her concerns. Isabella was one of the sweetest, kindhearted girls she’d ever met.

“Izy, what are you so afraid of?”

“Afraid of?” She asked.

Kara nodded slowly.

Isabella didn’t know how to answer.

It wasn’t necessarily a fear. Asperger’s meant that Isabella wasn’t good at interpreting relationships. She had a great example of a couple in her parents, but she didn’t seem to understand.

Her relationship with Alex wasn’t something that she could empathize with or value. She cared about him greatly, but couldn’t identify with it. She didn’t understand what was expected of her in this relationship. So perhaps that was why she didn’t understand the way he was so quick to want her.

“I’m not afraid… I-I just I don’t know how to be a girlfriend… I don’t know if Alex expects me to just… give into him.”

This seemed to be something Kara could handle. She adored Isabella, and she understood her concern. But there wasn’t much to it. Still, the childlike quality that she so much loved about Isabella was also the handicap.

“Izy, just play it by ear. You and Alex are friends… You could tell him you aren’t ready for that yet.”

“But won’t that upset him?” She looked up at her with sad, doe eyes.

“Alex would want you to be comfortable…“

“I don’t want to disappoint him, Kara. I just… I didn’t know that he would… do that.”

The other girl smiled. “I think you’re still so in shock. Alex made you feel good. Don’t you want to feel that way again?”

Isabella sighed, nodding. “I really care about him, but I don’t know the first thing about making him feel good.”

“You can tell him to slow down, Bells. Alex probably didn’t even consider that it’d be so much… harder for you. He was trying to make you happy. Don’t you know that?”

“I guess.”

“I just think you should tell him how you feel.”

“I tried. He said I shouldn’t be embarrassed…”

“And you shouldn’t. But if you don’t want to do anything sexual with him yet, that’s fine. Just tell him.”

“Okay.”