Memories That Vanished

Matt left soon after he kissed me, this time with a smile on his face. And I went back inside just to see Vladimir and Landon sitting on the hard floor in front of the door with their little arms crossed.
"What is wrong with Daddy?" Vlad demanded, getting to his feet and marching over to me.
I sighed and picked Landon up from the floor, ignoring my oldest son as he yelled for me not to walk away from him.
"Vlad, honey, Daddy is sick. I told you that," I murmured, taking a seat on the living room couch with Landon sitting in my lap, a serious look on his little face.
"But what kind of sick?" Vlad questioned, pulling himself up onto the couch next to us as I flicked the t.v onto some kids show on Disney. Landon poked me to get my attention and then pointed to his older brother.
"Daddy has amnesia," I told him calmly, just to receive a confused look.
"What's that, Mommy?" Landon asked, tilting his head to the side in confusion like I had seen his father do so many times before.
I sighed and answered their questions, "It means that he can't remember some things, guys,"
"Like us," Vladimir concluded, hopping down from the couch that Matt had bought way before the six year old was born. Vlad walked over near the front door, where we kept all our shoes, and pulled his little velcro converse onto his feet before he pulled the front door open and turned to look at me.
"Come on, Momma," He groaned, pointing outside into the fading sunlight.
"Where are you going?" I asked, standing up and cradling Landon to my side. I walked over to Vlad and he put my shoes down by my feet.
"Where are you going?" I repeated, pushing the shoes away with my left foot.
Vladimir sighed and turned to face me, placing the shoes back in front of me. "I am going to tell Daddy all about what he can't remember,"
"No you aren't," I told him, pulling him away from the open door and kicking it shut as he struggled against my grasp.
"Why not?" He asked impatiently, finally pulling away from me and standing there with his arms crossed.
I set Landon down, who ran back into the living room to watch t.v, and kneeled down in front of Vladimir.
I placed my hands on his shoulders, making sure he was listening, "Because Daddy can't handle all the new information. He'll figure it out soon," I soothed, running my fingers through his shaggy blonde hair.
"I just want to tell him, Momma, I miss my Daddy. He has to come home now," Vlad murmured, pulling himself away from my grasp stubbornly.
I sighed and reached out for him again, "I know you miss him. I miss him too, Vlad. I love your Daddy and I want him home but not if it means risking his health,"
My eldest son latched himself to me in a hug, his head buried in the crook of my neck as he whimpered. I wrapped my arms under his knees and picked him up. I walked up over to the couch and we sat down against next to a grinning Landon. Landon crawled onto his big brothers back and wrapped his arms around Vlad's neck from behind.
"I love Daddy, I love you, Mommy. I love you, Brothy," Landon said, his dimples showing. I kissed Vlad's forehead and murmured,
"I love you guys and I love Daddy, I always will,"
Landon climbed off of his brother and sat to the left of me as Vlad sat to the right. We watched 'Ben 10' for awhile before I decided that it was time to toss both boys into a bath before I put the little one to sleep at seven-thirty.

"Momma! Stop it!" Vlad shouted as I blew bubbles at him as the two of them sat in the master bath, covered with water and bubbles.
"Never!" I grinned, sticking my tongue out at Landon as he giggled, smashing bubbles into his older brothers hair.
"Landie!" Vladimir whined, "I've told you before! You're on my side!"
Landon shook his head and stuck his tongue out, "No! Mommy's!"
I calmed both of them down and started rinsing the conditioner through their hair, washing it out with a cup of water from the tub. When I had finished I wrapped each of them in a blue towel and carried them out of the bathroom, one in each arm. Usually Matt would carry one son and I would carry the other and we'd get them dresser and put Landon to sleep together before we hung out in Vlad's room with him for the next hour before he fell asleep. But tonight I was doing in on my own as Matt sat at his parent's house alone and confused.
I sighed as I put Vlad down on the rocking chair, still wrapped in his towel so I could dress Landon in his favorite spiderman pajamas, the ones that look like a spiderman suit.
"Goodnight, Baby," I soothed and laid him down in his wooden crib, his hazel eyes already closing.
"Daddy can't sing to me?" Landon asked quietly, looking up at me with squinting eyes.
I shook my head, "Not tonight, sweetie," I sighed, kissing his forehead as he shut his eyes and rolled around, trying to get comfortable.
I picked Vladimir up from the rocking chair, "Come on," I whispered.
I carried Vlad into his own bedroom and laid him on his little bed.
"Sing to me, Momma," Vladimir pleaded, resting his head on his doggy pillow as I shuffled through his dresser, trying to find some pajama's for him to wear.
"That's your Daddy's expertise, baby," I murmured, pulling out a pair of blue stripped pants and a plain blue t'shirt.
"But you can sing, Momma," He said, "Just for me,"
I motioned for him to walk to the end of his bed and he did. I pulled his clothing on him and tossed the towel into the hallway.
I laid on the bed with him and he rested his damp head on my chest, looking up at me.
"What song?" I asked, running my fingers through his hair,
"One of Daddy's," He whispered as I pulled the red blankets up around us. He curled into me as I began singing one of my favorite songs from Avenged Sevenfold;

"Your hazel green tint eyes watching every move I make.
And that feeling of doubt, it's erased.
I'll never feel alone again with you by my side.
You're the one, and in you I confide..."

The words to that song had thoughts swimming in my head as my oldest son wrapped his arms around me, and drifted off to sleep as I continued to sing the song that reminded me of Matt every time. Not only because of the fact that he sings it but because of the words.

"I give my heart to you,
I give my heart, cause nothing can compare in this world to you..."

I finished and closed my eyes, resting my head against Vlad's pillow as eight o'clock rolled around lazily. I don't know how long I laid there thinking about the love of my life but when I woke up next it was because Vladimir was yelling that Uncle Zacky was here to take us out for lunch.