You're Living a Lie, You Just Can't Hide From Me

“You’re kind of amazing.” Garrett spoke as Natalie rose to her feet.“What are you doing?”

“Come, dance with me.”

“I-I’m not a very good dancer.” He hesitated, as she took him by the hand.

“Its okay, I’ll lead.” She smiled, leading him to the dance floor and put his arms on her waist.

He held her awkwardly, unsure whether to take a firmer grasp on her or to keep his hold gentle. Natalie almost giggled as she pulled him closer. She was a small girl, so his arms wrapped tightly around her and pulled their bodies impossibly close together. It was only then that she put her arms around his neck.

Garrett grinned, taking in the scent of her hair as her head remained under his nose due to their height difference. She smelt of something heavenly, he couldn’t tell whether it was her perfume or her shampoo. Something about the girl was so addictive to him and he didn’t know if he could let her go now that she was so close.

She made him feel all sorts of things that he’d forgotten about. Just as he’d tried to forget Rachael and along with that everything he’d felt for her, Natalie brought all of these emotion back to him. He couldn’t remember if these were the same emotions or these were something totally new, but either way, he couldn’t deny them.

She made him feel like they were the only ones who mattered. No one had ever made him forget everything around him. Natalie made everything else disappear.

“You’re not so bad.” Natalie giggled. “But I don’t think you’ll ever be a ballroom champion.”

He chuckled. “I’m sorry, pageant queen.”

“Its okay, zombie killing machine.”

Garrett grinned.

She smiled, pressing her face against his chest and inhaling.

She couldn’t decide what he smelt like, how faint the detergent was, what type of soap he used, and cologne. All she knew was he had the smell of boy that was so addictive. Plus, whatever he (probably his mother) washed with seemed to make the cotton of his shirt even softer. Natalie grinned, burying her blushing cheeks against him.

All she could do was hope that all of the thoughts going through her head were normal. All she could do was try to contain herself. It wasn’t like her to want to act on her feels, but these feelings had only been for him for so long.

It was odd to be so close to the boy she’d crushed on from afar now. They were slightly older, only still just as stupid and confused. But this time, she wasn't going to mess up.

“Do you wanna get some dinner and watch Rosemary’s Baby?” Natalie smiled. “I know, not a zombie movie, but cult horror.”

Garrett chuckled. “You’ve won me over.”

“Alright.”

“Chinese?”

“Chinese.” She smiled. “But we should stop at 7/11 because I want some Watermelon Sour Patch Kids.”

“You get better the more time we spend together.”

Natalie smiled, emerging from the bathroom to where Garrett was already settled.

Her hair still styled perfectly, but she was dressed down in a pair of booty shorts and an old Kerosene Kids shirt. Of course, she’d just picked out a shirt, not even realizing that it was of Garrett and Pat’s old band. It was just something she’d packed, and then found in her closet. The band hadn’t even been all that great, but their merch guy was cute. Natalie really just threw it on, and pat down her curls, with no thought.

Garrett chuckled upon seeing the shirt. It was a shock it was that she even bought some of their crappy merch from Pat’s older brother, Tim. He was pretty embarrassed that she’d seen him in such a crappy band before he and Pat had founded the Maine.

“Soon enough, it’ll be worth something.” Natalie grinned, sitting beside him and grabbing the Lo Mein container.

“You went to Kerosene Kids shows, you know that’s false.”

She smiled. “I think the Maine is a much better fit for you and Pat anyway… this new CD is gonna be awesome.”

“You’ve barely heard anything, how do you know that?”

“I have a feeling.”

“I appreciate that, but I think you’re full of shit.”

Natalie giggled, placing the container down and leaning forward to grab the Sour Patch Kids.

Garrett chuckled, taking in the feeling of her body pressed against him as she leaned forward. The shirt was slightly big on her form, but he could feel just how small she actually was. He liked how she felt against him. The way all of her clothes smelt of her detergent and her perfume. The fabric of the cotton was worn and thin, but soft against his fingers.

He couldn’t help the thoughts that went through his head whenever she was around. Natalie wasn’t like other girls; he felt like they were old friends. Sure, there was sexual tension between them that neither spoke of, but it was also comfortable. She made him nervous, but not overwhelmingly so. She also made him comfortable.

She smiled, taking a handful of the watermelon candy, placing one on her tongue, savoring the flavor.

Garrett stole two, plopping them in his mouth and grinning.

“Hey!” She giggled, smacking his hand playfully.

He smiled playfully, taking in the bit of sugar from the candy that held residue on her lips. He just wanted to lick it off. She licked it off herself, something he found terribly arousing.

“Hey, you said that you wanted to play me that Ryan Adams vinyl.”

“Patience, young grasshopper. Let’s enjoy one thing at a time.”

“Alright.” He sighed dramatically.

“Prepare to be amazed.” Natalie smiled, sitting Garrett on her bed.

He smiled softly, letting go of her hands and watching as she made her way over to her record player.

She smiled, delicately placing the record onto the player, turning it on, and placing the needle onto the record.

Garrett smiled softly as she made her way over to him; the only sounds were of the record beginning to spin.

She sighed, sitting back beside Garrett as “Political Scientists” played.

She loved Ryan Adams, but her favorite CD of his was definitely “Love Is Hell.” There was something so delicate about it, and it was a step forward from his other work. It wasn’t quite as country tinged as his other material. But she was anxious for his newest release with the Cardinals that was coming out in November.

Natalie smiled, closing her eyes and taking in the lyrics.

She hoped that this would mean something to Garrett as it did to her. “Love Is Hell” had only been pressed on vinyl for 300 copies and she was lucky to get one of them. It was special, not only because it was so limited edition, but also because the music meant so much to her.

Nothing had ever given her chills the way that his music did.

Natalie didn’t know why it mattered so much to her that Garrett could fall in love with Ryan Adams music as she was. Perhaps it was because he’d been so stuck on his own music. Or perhaps, because she was pretty sure that she really wanted him to fall in love with her. This was just one thing that mattered to her.

He is drinking water from the faucet from the river
From the tributary it comes through rusted pipes
Outside his window he sees the water that's supposed to be clean
By the chemicals polluted by the candy factory lines

Someplace on the edge of town
Someplace on the edge of town
Is where they live --
Political scientists

He hadn’t heard anything quite like it before. Ryan Adams’ voice wasn’t aesthetically attractive, but it had delicateness and a roughness to it. His lyrics were amazing though.

Garrett had never heard anything like this before. Natalie had been totally right about this changing his life. But, of course, he would have probably been drawn to anything she supported.

Looking over at Natalie, he smiled at the way she listened. Her eyes were closed and she let out a sigh of bliss. The way that she took in the words as the genius they were.

All she wanted was for Garrett to appreciate this as much as she did. Ryan Adams had changed her life, so maybe he could help Garrett. It was all she wanted.

Garrett smiled softly, as Natalie placed her head on his shoulder. He stroked her hair gently, humming along with the song because he didn’t know the words. She hadn’t decided if it was too forward to touch him so, but he didn’t seem to mind.

“So you like it?”

“I love it.” He spoke, glancing at her.

“Glad to hear that.”

So now she is crawling on her hands and her knees
She is dirtying her jeans choking on her own perfume
With a pen she writes below the sink in someone's restaurant
This place is inconvenient for my name

She forgets to write it anyway
She forgets to write it anyway
The government supplies the cocaine
Political scientists

There's no guarantees
There's no guarantees
There's no guarantees