Listen To Your Heart.

I didn’t get to see Bee all day, so when I got home I was eager to see what she was up to. She was looking at a pamphlet, she was biting on the bottom of her lip, I started laughing. “You have the cutest look on your face” She scrunched her nose up and chucked the pamphlet at me, it floated to her feet and I continued to laugh. She sighed and rested her head on her desk.

She was looking through a college pamphlet, I didn’t understand. “Bee, why are you looking at Colleges?” She didn’t move, but I stood there silent waiting for her answer. “What am I going to do with my life? Do you know how hard it is to get a job when you haven’t been to college?” I kneeled down next to her. “You don’t have to go to college to sell merch” Bee lifted her head and looked at me, she smiled her breathing taking smile of hers. I don’t think she actually took me seriously though; I wanted Bee to come on tour with us and sell merch. Me and her on the road together, it would be perfect. “I can’t sell merch for the rest of my life though John” I looked down at my hands, I didn’t know how she would react to what I was about to say so my voice was low. “You wouldn’t have to, I could pay for everything” I looked up and straight away met her gaze, “Are you planning on marrying me one day Mr. O’Callaghan?” a smile spread across her face, I could feel my cheeks darken. “I was thinking about is Miss Lewis.”

Still smiling she kissed my cheek and took the pamphlet, “Well, I’d like to keep my options open. For now I guess I’ll just work at Denny’s” I smiled but it wasn’t genuine I kissed her perfect lips before walking out of her room ruffling my hair.

I got half way down the hallway before I realised that I hadn’t told Belle we were going on tour in a couple of weeks. I sighed, I didn’t know how she would react. I wanted her to come and sell merch, the tour lasted 3 months and I knew I couldn’t live without her for that long. I walked back into her room, she wasn’t there so I sat down at her desk. I realised Bee’s phone was next to me, with a picture of her and Alex on the screen. I scrolled down to see the caption, I shut me eyes tight hoping to god it was a lie.
‘I miss you and I know you miss me. That kiss, it left me wanting more. I love you’I rested my head in my hands, I could feel my eyes start to water. My heart broke a little, how could she?!

Her voice came from behind me full of worry. “John what’s wrong?” I kept my eyes close and hoped Alex had lied. “You kissed Alex, how could you?!” Belle instantly looked down, I couldn’t believe she would cheat on me, and with Alex fucking Gaskarth! “John, he grabbed my hand after the concert and kissed me. I pulled away of course; I just didn’t want to hurt you” Then I realised that was the night I told Belle I loved her, I stood up and walked towards her. “He kissed you the night I told you I loved you.” I turned around to try and contain my anger, I wanted to hit that mothafucker. I ran my hands through my hair and picked up Belle’s mirror, I threw it at the wall instantly feeling a bit better. When it smashed Belle gasped and said my name quietly “John” I turned around and looked her in the eyes, I could see her choking on her words. She finally managed to spit out “I love you and I’m sorry” I laughed, how could she cheat on me if she loved me? “You love me, bullshit.”

I pushed pass her and down stairs, she followed me but I needed space. Mom was in the kitchen, Shane and Russ were playing PS3. “John, you know I don’t like Alex. I’m sorry and I know I should have told you.” I turned around, I was so angry. My face was inches away from hers “Leave me the fuck alone, I don’t want to see you.” I walked towards the dining room through to the backyard, I
turned around and chucked the car keys at her before walking into the backyard.

I heard her start to cry but I didn’t feel sorry for her, I hated her. I walked out into the backyard and started kicking anything I could see. I sat down on the grass and just sat with my head in my hands. Garrett texted me ‘Russ said you and Bee had a fight, what’s wrong man?’

I chucked my phone at the fence and it smashed, “Oh fuck” I layed down and closed my eyes, the stars were coming out. I closed my eyes and nodded off to sleep, I woke up to mom’s screaming. I opened my eyes and rushed inside. “Mom, what’s wrong?” She started crying and put the phone back on the hook. “That was the hospital, Belle was in a car accident” my heart stopped.

“It’s my fault”