Listen To Your Heart.

I was still sobbing even after the funeral had finished, he replaced me. That’s all I could think of, he replaced me. Their laced hands made their way towards Jenny’s car; John hugged Shane and got into the back seat with Grace. I sent Shane a quick text, I knew he would have his phone on him.

‘Can you please tell your mom that Nick is picking me up and taking me for dinner? Oh and bud, please don’t tell John I’m in town, promise?’

I watched as Shane pulled his phone out of his pocket and looked around confused. My own soon vibrated. ‘Promise, but where are you?’ when I looked up he had managed to find me. I sank even further into the seat. As he got closer I realised his eyes were red and puffy, my heart ached for him. I pulled him into a hug squeezing him as tight as possible.

“Why won’t you come home? John is here, you can see him” Shane whispered. I closed my eyes tight to keep me tears hidden. “I’ll come home when John leaves. I don’t think he wants to see me anymore bud, not when he is with Grace” Shane pulled away and shook his head. “Well I don’t like Grace, her perfume hurts my nose. Please come home” he battered his eye lashes at me; I wasn’t going to give in though. “Everything is complicated at the moment, I’ll come home later I promise” Shane nodded slowly. “Okay” I hugged him once more before he ran back to the car.

By the time Nick came my eyes were completely red, he sighed and hugged me which only made me cry. “He replaced me” I sobbed into his chest. “No he didn’t Bee, it isn’t like that. John will always love you” I shook my head; I didn’t believe he loved me anymore. I felt like an idiot, he had already moved on while I was still going to sleep thinking of him. “Eric wants to see you” Nick mumbled. I nodded and took Nick’s hand while we walked to his car.

The drive was silent, I was tired and broken. I wanted to crawl up in a ball and just cry, I wanted to go to sleep and not wake up until I felt alright again.

It had only taken him 3 weeks to forget everything we went through together, to find someone better. Forever meant nothing anymore, that word meant little to me. I wanted to go home, I wanted to go home to New York and pretend like John wasn’t real. I watched Eric run towards me as I stepped out of Nicks car, he picked me up into his arms.

My eyes were still wet, when Eric put me down he realised this. His hand brushed away my tears, I was thankful I had these boys.

We just hung out at Eric’s house all night, it was nice to not have to worry. My phone vibrated and it was Shane. “John just left, will you come home now?” I smiled, and looked at Nick. “Will you take me home?” Nick nodded and stood up grabbing his keys.

When I got home Shane was in bed, I sat next to him and brushed his hair away from his face. His eyes fluttered open, “I didn’t mean to wake you up” I whispered, he groaned and rolled onto his side so he would face me. “Can you tell me a story?” he muttered. I smiled.

I told him the story about the princess who fell in-love with the handsome prince. I told him about the brave quests the Prince went on to find her the sacred rose that would make her forever happy. Then I told him about how the princess left the prince, at first Shane was confused. I explained that the prince lived in a far away land and he had to leave everything to come and see the princess. The princess felt like the prince was giving up to much for her. Shane asked, “But why did she leave him if they were in-love?” I smiled, my answer was simple. “She loved him too much to watch him walk away from everything”. I kissed his forehead and left Shane to fall asleep.

I climbed into my own bed and closed my eyes. I had far too much on my mind to fall asleep though, instead I thought about happy ways the story I had told Shane may end. I thought about the prince and the princess getting married and living happily ever after. I liked that ending but then again, that was just a story and this is real life. I don’t get to choose my happily ever after, but if I could; it would be me and John, forever.