Listen To Your Heart.

I closed my eyes and rocked back and forth in my chair, there was a knock at my office door. “Come in” I shouted. I opened my eyes and blink them twice to get the sleep out of them. Nora stuck her head in. “Sorry to bother you Miss Lewis, but you have a call on line 2” I smiled at her, “Thanks Nora” she closed the door. I rubbed my eyes before picking up the phone. “Hello, this is Belle” from the other end came chuckling. “I’d hope so, you are my daughter” I slumped into my chair not really wanting to talk to my father.

“Dad, I’m busy so” he coughed. “I’ll cut to the chase then.” I sighed. “Allie is on a plane as we speak” I sat up quickly lost for words. “Your mother came to her senses and apologised to Allie” I snickered. “Well if that’s all I better go” I slammed the phone back onto the hook and ran my hands through my hair. After everything I didn't even get a goodbye, I muttered a few curse words under my breath. Mr. Bailey walked in holding a newspaper. “I need you to change the ink in the printer in my office please Belle, I still don't know how to do it” he chuckled while I looked at my desk. I had an article I had to finish in 15 minutes and it still had 200 words missing. “Now Belle, don't keep me waiting” I slammed my hand against my desk and stood up.

“I’m sorry, but I you’ll have to find someone else to do your little jobs” I grabbed my bag and the few pieces of papers on my desk. “Is that so” he asked in his boss tone of voice. I smiled at him simply. “Yes, because I quit” I grabbed the rest of my things and walked out of my office smiling. It had been a while since I’d smiled in this office. I skipped to the elevator and pushed the number 1. I watched the people in the office stare at me stunned.

--

I stumble through the door holding a bag of clothes from the thrift store. “John, are you home?” I shouted knowing Danny would be at work. John came walking out of my bedroom shirtless, he yawned whilst looking at the bag of clothes. “Aren’t you suppose to be at work?” he asked pulling me into a hug from behind. I lift a dress out of the bag with a smile on my face. “I quit”. John’s body froze behind me and he let go of me. “Why?” he asked confused. I shrugged “Because I didn’t like it there, it didn't make me happy” John struggled with his words before he muttered. “Well what makes you happy?” I smiled and wrapped my arms around his neck. “Coming home to a shirtless John in my apartment” he chuckled and pecked my lips softly.

Just when I leaned in for another kiss my mobile rang, I answered it and turned back to look through the bag. “Hello” I spoke into the receiver. “Hey Belle, can you call John and see if I left my phone at home.” I chuckled. “I am home, where’d you leave it?” he thought for a moment before speaking. “On the couch. Why are you home?” I didn't want to worry Danny so I told him I wasn’t feeling well and hung up.

“Let’s go out tonight John, I want to dance” I smiled. His eyebrows tilted in “You hate going out yet alone dancing” I danced around him in a circle. “Time for something new” he grabbed my hands. He looked at me worried but shrugged it off.

--

I lead John directly into the middle of the dance floor; I smiled as we danced together. I liked this, I liked how I didn't care how much of an idiot I looked like. John’s hands moved down my torso to my hips where he pulled me against him roughly and leaned down. I hooked me hand at the back of his neck and continued to kiss him. When I pulled away I rested my head on his shoulder, my head was spinning. My smile faded when I saw Danny in the back making out with Anna, he was far beyond drunk. His hands were up the side of her top and hers were tangled in his hair, my heart rate intensified.

I pulled away from John and walked towards the girls bathrooms; John followed me through the crowd. I slammed open the door and rushed to the sink, I turned the faucet on. I looked in the mirror, my lips started to quiver. I was completely alone but the room echoed from the music that rushed through the door. I wet my face and listened to the water, I looked into the mirror and the room was spinning. It was happening. I wet my face again but I lost my footing and slipped onto my back side. I closed my eyes but the room kept spinning, I started to hyperventilate. I called for John but his name got caught in my throat, I shielded my eyes from the lights.

Then when I opened my eyes again a slower song was playing, I knew I had passed out. I hoped it wasn’t for too long, I didn't exactly want to tell John about the anxiety. I stood up and steadied myself, when Anna walked in with a huge smile on her face. I look at her through the mirror in disgust, she stopped. “Oh Belle, I heard you quit” I nodded but didn't speak. “I hope you don’t mind but Danny came by your office today with flowers and I told him that you quit. Hope you don’t mind” I was livid, it was not her right to tell him. “Then he invited me out tonight and well you know, I saw you watching” she giggled and walked to the sink next to me.

My hand shook on the sink and I walked out of the bathroom listening to her humming. I ran out of the doors and started walking home in tears. Danny was not my boyfriend or my property yet when I saw him kissing Anna it broke my heart. I just wanted to leave; I just wanted to run away. That’s all I knew, that’s what I was good at.