Time to Change

”I just missed your voice.”

Alex played with the ring on his finger, halfway paying attention. He would love to admit that he felt the same way but he was still a little bitter about their last encounter. And, okay, maybe he shouldn't have been acting like a twelve year old but...but he was anyway. “Yeah?”

”Yeah,” Eli said, her voice soft. She sighed on the other end of the line and he knew. He just knew.

“What's wrong, Eli?” And it was one of those situations where he forgot all about why he was upset—his main focus was Eli.

”James...”

“Did he hit you?!” Alex yelled before he could stop himself. “Because I'll fucking kill him if he touched you!”

”He didn't hit me, Alex.”

Alex frowned. He still didn't feel reassured. “Are you sure?”

”No. Of course, maybe he slipped me a date rape drug or something,” she muttered sarcastically.

His frown deepened. “People get roofied all of the time, Eli. It's a very serious matter. Did he hit you, Eli?”

Eli sighed and he knew she was rolling her eyes. ”No.”

“Are you sure? Because I know a guy who can make it look like an accident, you know? Or Zack could do it—he's strong. Or all of us could take him down—“

”Alex—“

“I mean, four against one are pretty even odds. Especially if—“

”Alex—“

“Because, I mean, what kind of douche fuck actually hits a girl? I swear, he should watch his—“

”Gaskarth!”

Alex paused when Eli raised her voice. “Yeah?”

”He didn't hit me. And, yes, I'm sure. Very sure. Because I would've kicked his ass myself.”

“So...what did he do?” And, yes, he'd admit that he felt a lot better with her reassurance. But he was still on edge and beyond prepared to use Zack for his strength to take James out when they were in town for her graduation.

”Well, he's a lawyer, right?”

“Sure,” Alex agreed, nodding though she couldn't see him do so.

”Well, he's a defense attorney for the county and he's...defending my father.”

Alex blanched. “Are you kidding me?!”

”No. We got into a huge fight. It was so bad, Alex,” she whispered.

“But he didn't hit you, right?”

Eli laughed. ”No, he did not. We just yelled until I cried and walked away.”

“He made you cry?!” Alex shrieked.

“Dude, what the hell is going on?” Jack asked, walking into the lounge on the bus. “Is someone getting killed?”

“Go away, Jack,” Alex said, rolling his eyes and motioning for him to leave.

Jack scoffed. “Whatever, bro. If someone's dying, don't ask me for my super sweet ninja skills to help you fight them off,” he told him before walking back towards his bunk.

”It was...just a really bad fight, Lex,” Eli told him.

Alex sighed, feeling completely hopeless when he heard her sniffle. And all he wanted was to be able to hold her and tell her it would be okay. “I just don't understand why he would take the case after all that asshole of a non-father did to you and your family,” he explained. And he didn't get it because, if he was in James' shoes, he would've dropped the case in an instant.

”He said he doesn't control the cases he gets and I understand that, I do. But he threw it back in my face, like, how was he supposed to know when I didn't tell him about it,” she told him.

“Piss poor excuse,” Alex said without hesitating. “Even without knowing the details, he shouldn't have taken the case. It's a conflict of interest, isn't it?”

”I don't know. But he said he's not dropping it.”

Alex sighed before giving in and asking the first question that had initially come to mind. “What did he do?”

Eli paused. ”Domestic violence. But I know there's more because he was very adamant that it wasn't important.”

Alex frowned, shaking his head. “He should drop the case. And you know he would if he actually cared about you,” he said. And he meant it.

”Alex...”

“No. You know I'm right, Eli. This is just more proof—he doesn't care about you or your feelings. There's a reason I don't like him, Eli. It's because he's not right for you. He doesn't want to date you because you're an amazing and beautiful woman—he wants to date you because you model in L.A. He wants a model girlfriend, that's all. You know I'm right, too.”

Eli sighed.

“I know you don't want to admit it, but. I am right.”

”I know you are, Alex. You're right.”

And Alex knew that for Eli to say those two words was very hard. He had never considered her a pushover and, maybe in another life, he would've liked James. And maybe his dislike was primarily based on the fact that he thought no one was good enough for Eli.

”I hate it when you're right, Alex,” she told him softly.

“Get used to it,” Alex joked—or, well, attempted.

Eli remained silent.

Alex sighed. “Believe it or not, Eli, I didn't want to be right this time. You know that I would be wrong for the rest of my life if it meant you never got hurt.”

”I know, Alex. I just don't know why I couldn't see it. He always seemed so genuine. I don't want to believe that he never meant it, you know?”

“Well, maybe he did mean it,” Alex said. “Just not in the way you wanted him to.”

Eli sighed. ”Yeah, it never seems to work out the way I want it to.”

Alex frowned. He really wished he wasn't miles away so he could hug her and make her feel better.

”I'm just going to... I don't know. Go do something productive.”

“Eli—“

”No, it's okay. I have a couple of calls to make before graduation. I'll talk to you later, Lex.”

She had hung up before Alex could even say goodbye.

+

That night, Eli decided it was a good idea to turn in early...like seven o'clock early. Crying really did wear her out. But she wasn't as upset as she had been before—talking about it with Alex had seemed beneficial, even if she didn't want to admit it in the first place.

She had never been so stubborn that she refused to admit when she was wrong—no, that was always Alex's role. (Of course, with him, even when he was wrong, he wasn't wrong.) But the words were still a little salty. She never wanted Alex to be right about James but only for the reason that she didn't want to believe that she had fallen for his sweet words that had been lies.

She didn't want to be that girl who fell all over herself for the first guy who called her pretty. But she had been and she hated it.

But one thing Alex had said really upset her—about James just wanting to have a model girlfriend. She could ignore the fact that she would never consider herself a model but she couldn't get over the fact that someone would use her for her looks.

Curled up in bed, she had wrapped herself in one of Alex's hoodies. It reminded her of home, Baltimore, the place she ran away from as soon as she could, and the place she really missed sometimes. She was dozing in and out of consciousness when there was a knock on her door.

She sat up quickly—she hadn't been expecting anyone. She glanced at the clock to see that it was twenty after eight. She got out of bed, zipping up Alex's hoodie, and walking out to the door. She glanced out of the peephole and rolled her eyes.

At that point, she wasn't sure if her life could have been more of a cliché soap opera than it was at that time. She could only be thankful that James didn't appear to be intoxicated.

“What do you want, James?” Eli asked, her voice soft. She refused to cause a scene and upset her neighbors—that was too tacky.

“Can we talk?”

She sighed. “What do you think we're doing now?” she asked tersely.

“Without a door between us?”

She shook her head—at least he had the decency to sound remorseful. “Are you dropping the case?” she asked. Although it really didn't matter to her anymore—it wouldn't change the fact that it hadn't been his initial reaction in the first place.

“I can't do that, Eli,” James told her with a sigh.

“Then I can't be with you anymore,” she told him calmly.

“Eli, don't do this, please.”

Eli rolled her eyes. “I'm sure you'll move on to your next model girlfriend in no time.”

“Is that what this is about?”

“Is it a lie?”

“Why would you even say something like that? That's something Alex would say.”

Eli paused; he could say many things about her but he had no right to drag Alex into it. She threw open the door and James took a step back; maybe she was intimidating when she was furious. “Listen to me, you stupid piece of shit. You will not bring Alex into this conversation. He has nothing to do with it. Believe it or not, I'm mad at you all on my own. Alex is not a determining factor in this. I'm breaking up with you because you hurt my feelings, you upset me, and you don't respect me.”

“I respect you just fine, Eli, I just—“

“Shut up,” Eli snapped. “If you did respect me, or even care about me like you claim to, you would've dropped the case the second I asked,” she told him. “So don't try to play the whole 'oh, poor me, my girlfriend is breaking up with me and I'm sad' card, because I no longer give a shit.”

James frowned and remained silent; he really had no idea what to say. He never would have expected to have Eli yell at him at any point—he always thought she seemed so demure.

“Now, I will give you thirty seconds to remove yourself from my doorway, and my life, before I force you out. And don't think I won't try it,” Eli said.

James stood there for a couple of seconds. “You know, I guess there was a part of me that thought I could change your mind.”

Eli frowned, her eyebrows furrowing. “Change my mind about what?” she asked.

James shrugged. “I guess it would be a waste, though. You'll always be in love with Alex.”

And with that, he turned and walked down the hallway. And while Eli was still furious he would bring her best friend into the argument, she was also supremely confused.

Why was everyone questioning her feelings towards Alex now when they never had before?