First You Fall

Toni’s P.O.V

Two Months Later

I swear, Bailey hitting my car months ago was probably the best thing that ever happened to me. Well not the event in particular but Zacky is the best thing that has ever happened to me. Not that I would let his egotistical ass know that. Our relationship was going pretty damn good despite the way it might look to an outsider. We had a ton of trivial fights but never anything huge. I think we just like working each other’s nerves so that we could have angry sex followed by incredible make-up sex. I’ve also come to really love hanging out with the guys. When you put that whole intimidating, and dangerous look aside, they were a lot of fun to be around. Johnny and Val had become my closest friends. Val and I were especially close. There were times when I felt a little left out from everyone else, like when they would go on ‘jobs’. They wouldn’t come back until very late and no one would ever tell me what was going on. I mean I knew that it was probably generally bad mob business type things but that wasn’t enough to satisfy my curiosity. Val always helped me get over that despite the fact that she was a part of it. Sometimes she would stay behind with me instead of going with the guys on their ‘job’ but for the most part I just tried to keep busy so I wouldn’t feel left alone. A couple weeks after Zacky and I got together I finally got a job. Not just any job, but the same job I’d had before. I’d gone back to Rory and begged for my job as a bartender back and she finally gave in. This fueled a couple of arguments between Zacky and I.

Flashback

“Hell fucking no! You’re not working there.” Zacky said harshly, looking up from the papers he had been inspecting.

“Why not?” I asked, crossing my arms over my chest.

“Because I said so.”

“I’m sure you don’t think that bullshit is going to work.” I replied turning to leave his office. “I’ll do what I want.”

“No you won’t.” Zacky said, standing up and blocking my way out.

“Zacky it took me forever get this job back and I’m not quitting it just to make you happy.”

“Why do you need to work anyway? You’ve got me.”

“Are you trying to make me out to be some fucking slut using you to pay her bills?” I pushed Zacky’s hands off my wrists.

“Why the fuck do you always have to misinterpret what I say. You fucking know that’s not what I meant.” Zacky said, clenching his fist.

I sighed and wrapped my arms around his neck.

“Look I need a job. I can’t keep borrowing money from you to-”

“It’s not borrowing. I’m giving it to you because I want to.” Zacky said, cutting me off.

“Well I won’t keep taking money from you. I need a job, Zacky. Besides I like working there. It keeps me busy and entertained when you guys always disappear and leave me out of shit.”

“Fine.” Zacky sighed. “But I swear to fucking God if I see any guy at that bar so much as look at you the wrong way I’ll start breaking body parts.”

“Deal.” I smiled.

“Good because it wasn’t up for negotiation.” Zacky wrapped his arms around my waist and pushed me backwards. A few steps later I could feel his office desk pressing into my back. Zacky pushed me down onto the table and climbed on top of me. I slid my hands down his torso and to his belt. Seconds later I had his pants down and my legs wrapped around his hips.

“I want you now. And it’s not up for negotiation.” I whispered in his ear, slipping my tongue out to lick along his neck.

“Fair enough.” Zacky replied before pressing his lips to mine.

I slid a drink down the bar before turning to mix another one. When I spun back around I saw Val sitting on a stool in front of me.

“Hey.” I said putting the drink down in front of the young blonde that had ordered it.

“Zacky asked me to pick you up because he couldn’t get here in time. You almost ready to go?” Val asked.

“Actually my shift was over 10 minutes ago so we can just head out now.” I said walking over to Rory.

I told Rory I was leaving and headed back to the staff room to grab my stuff. I pulled out a duffle bag and slung it over my shoulder.

“You spending the night at the house again?” Val asked, referring to Zacky’s place where pretty much all the guys spent their days and nights despite the fact that they all had their own places.

“Yeah. My cable got cut again and I’m starting to miss late night television.”

“I don’t get it. Why don’t you just let Zacky pay the bill?” Val asked and we walked out the back door and towards the street.

“Because he doesn’t know it got cut off and I’m not going to tell him. I don’t want him paying my bills like some goddamn sugar daddy.”

“But you let him buy you clothes and things.”

“It’s just different.” I said, climbing into the car. “The occasional dress or jeans here and there isn’t the same thing as letting him pay my bills. It’s the principle of the matter.” I shrugged.

“Well then why don’t you just move in with him? You spend so much time there anyway, you might as well be living there permanently.”

“We’ve never talked about it. And I’ve actually never thought about it.” I said looking out the window as Val drove.

“Well it’s a damn good idea. Anyways do you think there’s a place where we could grab a late meal. The guys just got back from a job and I don’t think they’ve eaten yet.”

“Yeah we could probably go to that Chinese place and pick stuff up.” I said, only slightly wondering what job had kept them so busy this time.

Almost an hour later we were parked in Zacky’s driveway and carrying bags of Chinese up the stairs. When we finally got inside, I dropped the bags on the table in the lounge where I knew the guys would all gather to eat.

“Where are they?”

“Not sure.” Val replied as she began taking cartons out of the bags.

I left the lounge and headed down the hall to Zacky’s office. He would always complain when I barged in there unannounced but I did it all the time anyway. I wrapped my hand around the brass knob and swung the door open. At the exact moment the door opened a shot was fired. On the floor of Zacky’s office lay a man with blood pouring from a hole in his head. The guys all stood around the office and Zacky stood in front of the dead man with a gun in his hand. I froze.

Zacky looked up and saw me in the door way. He put the gun down on the desk and walked towards me. When he reached me he pushed my stiff body out of the door and shut it behind me.

“I told you to stop barging in there like that.” Zacky said calmly, wrapping his arms around my waist. “When did you get here?” He asked.

I couldn’t bring myself to respond. I just stood there in his arms, frozen. And then suddenly I wasn’t. I don’t know what came over me. I pushed his arms off of me and ran. I ran to the front door and grabbed Val’s keys off the table. I flung the door open and ran down to the driveway. I could hear Zacky running after me and Val yelling but I didn’t stop. I jumped into the car and I was speeding off before I even had the door fully closed. I wasn’t sure why I was running or where I was running too. But all I could see was Zacky shooting that guy. The image ran through my head. Over and Over. Guns, blood, dead, Zacky. Suddenly I wasn't so anxious to know what went down at 'jobs'.