First You Fall

Toni’s P.O.V.

I stood frozen outside of Denny’s and quickly contemplated my options. I could run but with the six of them chasing me I doubt I stood a chance. Did I even want to run? I looked over at the guys and Val. Jimmy, Brian and Johnny leaning against a car at one end with their arms crossed over their chests and composed faces. Matt and Val were on the other end, Matt holding the same calm stare that the other guys had but Val looked different. She looked worried, confused and just all around stressed. Sadness hit me like a punch to the stomach when I saw that look on her face because it was perfectly clear that I had caused it. But that pain was nothing compared to when I looked over at Zacky. The slight bags under his eyes and his weary stance made it obvious that he hadn’t slept last night and if he had it wasn’t much of a decent sleep. I knew I was the cause of that too but that wasn’t what caused pain to wash over me. It was the look on his face. It was more than just the calm stares that the other guys had given me and it wasn’t the worried face that Val possessed. And that’s what scared me. His face held a blank stare. There was nothing there at all. It was as if he didn’t care. Zacky just stood there, hands in his pockets and leaning a little to one side. His stance was almost intimidating.

I knew I’d been standing there for about a minute and a half and no one had made a move yet. It was as if they were all waiting for something. Apparently waiting for me to do something. I looked down both sides of the street and weighed my options again. When I turned a little to the left and took a step I saw Jimmy stand up straight and move a little closer to me. A quick hand motion from Zacky had Jimmy stepping back. I looked at Zacky again but the empty stare was still there. I took another side step to the left and waited to see what would happen. When nothing happened I took one more step to the side. Still no reaction from any of them. That’s when I turned fully around and started walking. I walked to the end of the car that Jimmy, Johnny and Brian had been leaning against and paused.

Here’s to taking risks.

Zacky’s P.O.V

I watched as Toni started walking. I had instructed all the guys to not make a single move. This was her decision and I wasn’t going to force her to stay. The way I saw it she was stubborn enough that she’d try to do what she wanted anyway. I turned and watched as she took another step to the side eyes still on me. I knew she was trying to get a read on me, to understand what was going on but I kept a blank stare. As far as I was concerned she didn’t deserve any loving or worried look from me. As much as I wanted to fight it those feelings were there. But she didn’t deserve to see them. She ran out on me. No reason, no explanation, just bolted. I had contemplated shooting her a murderous glare when I saw her but decided against it. I wanted her to make a choice not scare the living shit out of her.

I watched as Toni paused and stood a couple of feet away from Jimmy. Then she turned and shocking us all opened the door and climbed right into Johnny’s car. Johnny looked to me for a response but before I could say anything Toni was speaking.

“Well you’ve interrupted my breakfast, are we going somewhere or not?”

I nodded at Johnny and he climbed into his car as well. I walked over to the car I had come in and got in, followed by Brian. When he was in I started the car up and began driving back to my place knowing Johnny would follow behind me.

“That was” Brian paused “unexpected.”

I responded with just a nod.

“What happens now?” Brian asked.

“I’m not sure.” I replied honestly.

A little while later I pulled into my garage, stopped the car and hopped out. When Johnny’s car pulled up I walked over and opened the door next to Toni.

“Let’s go.” I said, motioning to the house with my head before turning and walking off. I could hear Toni’s footsteps behind me as I headed into the house and up to my room. I opened the door and walked over to the couch, sitting down and looking up at Toni standing in the doorway.

“Do you have a fucking explanation for me?” I said in a harsh tone.

“I don’t owe you a goddamn thing.” Toni snapped, walking in front of me and crossing her arms.

“Was that what you were telling yourself all of last night?” I smirked, leaning back on the couch.

“All of last night I was telling myself that my fucking boyfriend is a goddamn killer!” Toni said, raising her voice and glaring at me.

“Don’t pretend you didn’t know.”

“Don’t pretend you give a shit.” She bit back and that’s when I snapped.

“You think I don’t give a shit?” I shouted, standing up and walking closer to her. “If I didn’t give a fucking shit I wouldn’t have spent all last night driving around this entire fucking city looking for your ass. I wouldn’t have men hanging around every goddamn place I thought you might go. Don’t fucking stand there and tell me I don’t give a shit. And don’t you dare fucking stand there and try to convince yourself you’re right. You and I both know that you wouldn’t be standing here right now if you thought I didn’t care.” I finished, now standing so close to her I could feel her heavy breaths on my skin.

Realizing how close we were, Toni took a couple of steps back.

“I was stunned.” She whispered. “That’s my only fucking excuse.” She looked down.

“Stunned?” I asked.

“Yes stunned!” She snapped, looking up at me again. “Stunned, shocked, caught of guard. You know feelings that might be considered normal when a girl sees her boyfriend shoot a guy in the head!”

“What is with this I killed someone bullshit. Are you trying to tell me you didn’t know all this goddamn time that leading the mob might involve killing people?”

“I knew Zacky, I just didn’t know.”

I paused and just looked at her with one eyebrow raised.

“What I mean is that” Toni paused and looked thoughtful for a moment. “I explained to Johnny already. Knowing that it happens and seeing it happen are different.”

“So now that you’ve seen it you want to leave?” I asked, knowing my anger was clearly showing on my face.

“I didn’t fucking say that!” Toni yelled.

“You didn’t need to. You ran the fuck away.”

“Well I’m fucking here now, aren’t I?” She said lowering her voice.

“Yeah you’re here. So what are you going to do?”

Seconds later I felt Toni jump on me and I instinctively wrapped my arms around her small frame as she wrapped her legs around my waist.

“I’m going to do everything I missed doing last night.” Toni replied before pushing her soft lips onto mine.

Seconds later the kiss became heated and rushed. I walked towards the bed with Toni in my arms, trying to remove my shirt. I dropped her onto the bed and climbed on top of her, losing my shirt along the way. When my face reached hers I pressed my lips to hers for another fiery kiss. Seconds later her clothes were tossed to the floor and I could feel her hands fumbling with my belt. Removing my lips from hers again, I sat up to give her better access. Just as she pushed my pants and boxers down my hips, I grabbed her wrists and held them up above her head. I leaned down closer to her face and looked her in the eye.

“Now you know what you’re getting into. You know who I am, you know what I do. Should I be expecting you to run again?” I murmured.

“The only thing you should be expecting me to do is show you how much I missed you last night.” She pushed her hips up into my erection and I groaned.

“Good because I wasn’t letting you go.” I whispered in her ear as I thrust into her.