She Used to Be a Pearl

"Are you sure you want to just pop in like this?" Amanda asked from the driver's seat as we pulled up to the empty venue.

It had been a week since I decided that I needed to get John back. The boys were back in Arizona and Amanda offered to drive me to where they were playing. Unfortunately we got lost along the way and missed the show.

Tonight is going to be perfect. I'm wearing John's favorite dress of mine and the perfume that he loves. I also curled my hair just the way he likes. I spent all day getting ready just for him. I know it will be worth it.

"Absolutely. I need to do this." I nodded.

She unbuckled her seatbelt and walked in after me. I had a good idea of where the boys would be. Kennedy texted Amanda some directions as to where to go.

I slowly opened the door with Amanda behind me.

I walked inside and saw all the boys.

They came up and greeted Amanda and I. I noticed that the boy I needed to see was missing from the pack. I turned my head and my eyes landed on the familiar figure. It was John with a girl on his lap. They were attached at the mouth and he was holding a red cup. After hearing the commotion he pulled away and looked up. His eyes widened when they met mine. It was as if everything was moving in slow motion. I turned away and ran out the door.

"Caty!" He yelled from behind me.

I ran out of the building while he followed behind me.

"Caty please wait! It wasn't what it looked like!"

"You don't have to explain anything to me." I said as I finally turned to face him. His eyes were bloodshot with bags under them.

"Please Caty. You don't understand! I missed you, I really did. Why did you come back for me? Did you come all this way just to go back home? Let's just talk about this." He begged.

"What is there to talk about?" I whispered.

"Our fight, what you saw in there, why you left." He answered. "I didn't mean what I said to you. You were a great girlfriend. You look beautiful tonight."

"I'm sorry for looking through your phone."

"I don't care about that anymore. All I want is you."

"Who was that girl?" I asked.

"She was just some girl. I don't even know her name." He told me.

"Then why were you with her?" I asked.

"To ease the loneliness. It's been really hard without you." He said shyly.

"Was she the first girl?" I asked already knowing the answer.

"Yes." He lied.

I started walking away from him again.

"Wait! What are you doing?" He asked running after me.

"I deserve honesty, John." I told him. "I know about the other girl last week. She answered your phone."

"That doesn't count, I was drunk." He told me seriously.

"It doesn't count because you were drunk?" I screeched. "So, losing my virginity didn't count because I was drugged? Derek raping me didn't count because he was drunk? Him pushing me down the stairs didn't count? Him telling me I was a worthless slut didn't count? All that stuff seemed to count to me! Drinking is no excuse!"

I got into the car and grabbed the spare set of keys in the glove box. I put the key in the ignition and peeled out of the parking lot leaving John standing there with his mouth hanging open.

My phone started to ring and I answered it.

"Hel-lo?" I sobbed.

"Honey, what happened?" Amanda asked.

"I le-eft. I'll come g-get you later. Spend some ti-ime with Kenny." I hiccuped.

"No, I'll just have him take me home later. Go wherever you want, but be careful. I'm sorry this didn't work out." She apologized.

I just hung up and threw my phone on the passenger seat. I found a good spot and pulled over on the side of the road and cried.

---------------------------------------------------

I stood in the parking lot watching the little Pontiac drive away.

It's really over this time.

Why did I say that? Of course I'm responsible for my actions when I'm drunk. She never even liked me drinking in the first place. Why the fuck did I have to say that?

Tour's over in five weeks. I don't have anyone to come home to.

That's when my thoughts were cut off by my phone ringing. It was an unlisted number.

"Hello?" I asked.

"Hey Johnny baby! It's me!"