Remembering Sunday
We don't have to fight tonight
By the time we got up the next day Lexi had already gone to work and I forced myself to pack even though I really didn’t want to go.
I spent the day packing, cleaning up and attempting to do some writing with Jack but he was that tired he wasn’t making much sense.
I knew full well what I was doing to him; I was driving him to the edge of exhaustion all because I was too scared to let him leave.
If he left Lexi and I were really living together and I wasn’t sure what would happen. We could fall apart again, I could make the wrong move or we could argue and I didn’t want any of that.
I wanted to live with her more than anything but I needed to know we’d be okay on our own and with Jack around we had someone to keep us occupied, to take the pressure of us.
He couldn’t live with us forever but I was doing my best to prolong the time he did spend here even if it did mean making him sick.
I’d never seen Jack this quiet, he had never had the longest attention span but now it was nonexistent. All the nights on the couch had caught up with him, I was sat watching him sleep in the chair as Lexi walked in.
She’d seemed wrong since she walked in and I knew all too well why, she was tired. The couch was comfy and big enough to sleep on but you ask anyone who has spent the night on a couch and they’ll tell you it’s never the best nights sleep.
I almost had to hand feed them they were that tired and they just sat mostly in silence all night.
It was like living with 2 zombies, when they got up they wandered without purpose. Jack seemed incapable of forming words and Lexi just seemed unbothered by anything that was said or done.
Someone could have run in with a gun threatening to kill us all and them 2 wouldn’t have noticed.
I refused to allow Jack have a bath in fear he’d fall asleep and drown so I forced him into the shower instead, he returned to the couch and rested his head on my shoulder as Lexi went for a shower.
She walked out with her hair dripping wet.
“Lexi babe you’ll be ill if you don’t dry your hair,” I warned and she glared at me.
“It Is dry,” she snapped.
“No it’s not! Your leaving puddles where you stand,” I joked.
“Sorry mom” she snapped sitting in the chair opposite us.
“Don’t be grumpy,” I begged.
“I’m not grumpy,” she argued back.
“Yes you are,” I replied and I knew why.
Lexi with lack of sleep meant she was evil and nobody was safe from her outbursts, even the smallest thing would annoy her and I knew if she didn’t get sleep tonight we were heading for an argument.
I nudged Jack and he sat up rubbing his eyes.
“Go to bed,” I stated and he nodded getting up and wandering off.
“And you,” I stated looking at her.
“Your on my bed,” she snapped and I rolled my eyes.
“I’ll sleep here you sleep with Jack” I offered and she shook her head.
“I’ll sleep here,” she stated.
“Lexi come on…” I started.
“Just go!” she shouted and I did as I was told aware that it wasn’t worth the argument.
Once again I discovered Jack had stolen my lounge pants and I had to look for another pair. I remembered I’d washed some today so I wandered through to the kitchen to fetch them.
I spent the day packing, cleaning up and attempting to do some writing with Jack but he was that tired he wasn’t making much sense.
I knew full well what I was doing to him; I was driving him to the edge of exhaustion all because I was too scared to let him leave.
If he left Lexi and I were really living together and I wasn’t sure what would happen. We could fall apart again, I could make the wrong move or we could argue and I didn’t want any of that.
I wanted to live with her more than anything but I needed to know we’d be okay on our own and with Jack around we had someone to keep us occupied, to take the pressure of us.
He couldn’t live with us forever but I was doing my best to prolong the time he did spend here even if it did mean making him sick.
I’d never seen Jack this quiet, he had never had the longest attention span but now it was nonexistent. All the nights on the couch had caught up with him, I was sat watching him sleep in the chair as Lexi walked in.
She’d seemed wrong since she walked in and I knew all too well why, she was tired. The couch was comfy and big enough to sleep on but you ask anyone who has spent the night on a couch and they’ll tell you it’s never the best nights sleep.
I almost had to hand feed them they were that tired and they just sat mostly in silence all night.
It was like living with 2 zombies, when they got up they wandered without purpose. Jack seemed incapable of forming words and Lexi just seemed unbothered by anything that was said or done.
Someone could have run in with a gun threatening to kill us all and them 2 wouldn’t have noticed.
I refused to allow Jack have a bath in fear he’d fall asleep and drown so I forced him into the shower instead, he returned to the couch and rested his head on my shoulder as Lexi went for a shower.
She walked out with her hair dripping wet.
“Lexi babe you’ll be ill if you don’t dry your hair,” I warned and she glared at me.
“It Is dry,” she snapped.
“No it’s not! Your leaving puddles where you stand,” I joked.
“Sorry mom” she snapped sitting in the chair opposite us.
“Don’t be grumpy,” I begged.
“I’m not grumpy,” she argued back.
“Yes you are,” I replied and I knew why.
Lexi with lack of sleep meant she was evil and nobody was safe from her outbursts, even the smallest thing would annoy her and I knew if she didn’t get sleep tonight we were heading for an argument.
I nudged Jack and he sat up rubbing his eyes.
“Go to bed,” I stated and he nodded getting up and wandering off.
“And you,” I stated looking at her.
“Your on my bed,” she snapped and I rolled my eyes.
“I’ll sleep here you sleep with Jack” I offered and she shook her head.
“I’ll sleep here,” she stated.
“Lexi come on…” I started.
“Just go!” she shouted and I did as I was told aware that it wasn’t worth the argument.
Once again I discovered Jack had stolen my lounge pants and I had to look for another pair. I remembered I’d washed some today so I wandered through to the kitchen to fetch them.