Between a Little Piece of Heaven and the Danger Line

I sat in the rain on my front lawn, drinking the beautiful liquid that is Jack Daniels. I stared at my driveway, watching the pretty sparkling drops falling. I could still see Jimmy pulling up into it with a huge smile on his face, ready to hang out with me for the day. I never got sick of that fantastic man. He was the best friend anyone could have in the whole entire world. He was just so... awesome... And now he was gone. He’d never pull up into my driveway again. I started crying again and quickly drunk more in a lame attempt to stop myself from crying. I had to man up. Jimmy wouldn’t want me pissing around crying. God Jimmy, just come back... Please... I miss you so much...

A car pulled into my driveway. That’s trippy... I blinked a few times to check if I was imagining things. No, there was definitely a car there... Someone came running around the side of it and I squinted, trying to work out who it was as they approached me.

“Brian! What are you doing?” a voice called to me and I frowned. I looked down at myself to see I was completely drenched. Oh jeez... I looked back up to the person and realised it was Zacky.

“I... dunno...” I managed to say before taking another large gulp of the sweet alcohol that numbed the pain. I felt hands on me and my head spun as I was pulled up, then dragged inside my house. I felt a cold lino floor beneath me not too long after I heard the front door slamming shut. Gosh that was cold... I felt so uncomfortable. Who the hell got me wet? I didn’t want to be wet...

“What have you done to yourself Bri?” Zacky said from... somewhere... What did he mean by that?

“I miss Jimmy...” I mumbled while trying to sit up. My head was spinning too much, so I just laid back down on the cold floor. I felt the bottle being taken away from me and I started whingeing. That was the only thing that was making my life bearable.

“Look man, we’re all having trouble with moving on. We’re all as depressed as you are,” Zacky explained and I looked around the room for him. I noticed we were in my kitchen and he was leaning casually against the bench. He looked so cute with the raindrops still on his face. I smiled up at him uncontrollably as I got the typical butterfly feeling in my stomach. I just wanted to reach up and kiss him, but I couldn’t. I could barely move.

“I... I...” I attempted to tell him I loved him, but I was getting too dizzy. The nice feeling of love had been replaced by the uneasy feeling I always got before I puked up all of the contents of my stomach. I can’t throw up in front of Zacky... He’ll be repulsed from me... It’s totally not attractive...

“When you’re sober tomorrow, you have to come back to Matt’s place. It’ll help us all to see you again,” Zacky ordered me. Gosh, no need to be bossy about it Z... I dunno if I’ll be sober though... I love Jack too...

“I’ve got a new song!” I blubbered excitedly, suddenly remembering what I was doing before I found Jack.

“I know, Bri. Come on, let’s get you out of those clothes. You’re drenched,” I heard him say sadly before I was lifted off the ground again. The sudden lift of my head made my world turn nearly all black. I felt like shit. My mind wouldn’t stop spinning and it was going to make me chuck any minute... Before I knew it, I wasn’t wet anymore and I was lying tucked up in my warm bed. I could vaguely see Zacky putting something on the bedside table. He was so cute... And he had no idea I liked him that much. Jimmy had passed knowing I loved him to death, as my best friend, of course. But Zacky might die not knowing how I love him. I groaned as my head started throbbing from all the thinking I had been doing. I had to say something. I couldn’t let that happen.

“Zack...” I said while letting out a sigh at the same time.

“Yeah?”

“I love you, man,” I said with a small smile. Then, my head’s dizziness overwhelmed me and I slipped into the darkness...

The next morning, I woke up with a massive headache. Moaning with annoyance, I rolled over and pulled the blankets up further. Oh shit, I was naked too. What the fuck happened to me last night? It was then that I saw the glass of water and packet of painkillers on my bedside table. Well that was thoughtful of me... No, I didn’t do that... Someone was here last night with me... Who was it...? Zacky! Zacky was here, and he was being kind to me by knowing I’d have a hangover today and being prepared. I quickly took the medication and moved back into the middle of my bed. So why the hell was I naked? After my head cleared, I tried thinking hard back to last night. I barely remembered Zacky being here. God, I’d have to ask him. I reached for my cell phone and saw it already had a text from Zacky on it.

‘Come to Matt’s sometime today. You promised me last night. Michelle won’t be there’ it read. I sighed. I really wasn’t in the mood for talking to Matt. But if Zacky says I promised him, I’d better do it so he doesn’t get angry with me... And at least Michelle won’t be there. I told her to fuck off the day after Jimmy passed. I wanted to be alone. Me, my guitars, and Jack. That’s all I was surviving off. I got up, showered and dressed in simple dark grey jeans and a plain white t-shirt. I grabbed a leather jacket and a bottle of Jack Daniels and then headed out, miraculously feeling well enough to drive. I parked in Matt’s driveway behind Johnny’s car and walked up to the front door, feeling nervous. I hadn’t spoken to anyone for what seemed like a hell of a long time. I didn’t know how they’d react. Taking a quick gulp of my drink, I mustered up enough confidence to walk in. The first person I saw was the handsome Zacky Vengeance sitting on the couch, also looking nervous. Oh God... What did happen last night?