Must Be Dreamin'

Lauren came to me a few days after Kirstie and I got back from tour, asking if I wanted to help in a little party for Kirstie and Josh before their wedding. I thought that was so cute! Of course I said yes. Neither of them knew anything about it either.

That night, I went to Lauren’s to get ready. She looked lovely like always. She evendemanded said that she would do my hair and make up. Have I ever mentioned that I love this chick?

“So… you know Jimmy…” she started while curling my hair.

“Jimmy what?” I shot back, wondering why she brought this up… randomly.

“He uh… I think. I’m not sure. It’s probably nothing. I shouldn’t have brought it up,” she rambled on.

“Lauren, tell me!” I said… a little too loudly.

“I think… he has a girlfriend. I’m not sure though. I’ve just been seeing him around with a girl and… they seem close,” she replied quickly.

I just nodded my head and gazed into the mirror, unblinking. Honestly, I knew this day would come. Jimmy’s a gorgeous guy. He’s bond to find a girl for him… but that doesn’t make it easier.

“Ky, I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said anything…”

“No, it’s fine. Thanks for telling me,” I cut her off.

As she finished my hair, neither of us said anything. I didn’t want it to affect me, but… it did. I loved that guy so much… and now… he’s with someone else.

Oh well. I’m not going to let that ruin my night. It was time to head out and I put a smile on my face. Just because Jimmy has a… ‘girlfriend’ now, doesn’t mean I need to bring everyone else’s night down.I just may have a few drinks…

Lauren drove us to the Deegan household where the party was being held. I was excited now. There were going to be so many people here. I wouldn’t have to see Jimmy…even though I’d like too.

When we walked in after hiding Lauren’s car, everything was just chilling and walking around. Are you kidding me? Kirstie and Josh could have been the one’s walking in! Trust me, Lauren and I gave them an earful before we shooed them to their hiding placing.

So far so good.I haven’t seen Jimmy. Everyone’s pretty quiet… well, as quiet as it can be with the Mulisha boys around. But once they heard a car pull up the long drive, they shut up. I actually wanted to laugh at how quickly it got quiet. But I held it in.

Once Kirstie and Josh walked in, someone flicked on the lights and everyone shouted out surprise. It startled both of them, but they quickly smiled. Kirstie looked around and when her eyes spotted me, she came sprinting over and nearly tackled me into a hug.

“Surprise!” I smiled once my balance was steady again.

“I knew something was up! I knew it!” she said once we parted.

I just laughed and we went about doing our little thing. Of course, her and Josh clung to each other all night. It was cute though. I didn’t tease them. This was all for them. I’m glad they were enjoying it.

As the night went on though, I spotted him… with her. It took me aback at first, but I had a drink in my hand. I was good for now. Kirstie called me over to sit with her and Josh though. When I got over there, Todd was sitting with them too. I smiled at him and took a seat next to him.

“You doing ok?” he asked caringly while slinging an arm around my shoulders.

Todd and I are still friends. We’ve accepted that we shouldn’t be together. We were both content with being good friends. I’m not too sure about his and Jimmy friendship though. I never asked and… kind of don’t want to.

“Yeah,” I sighed.

“Aw, someone needs a hug,” Kirstie cooed from her Joshie boy’s arms.

“Aw, she does,” Todd countered in the same tone as he brought his other arm around me and I gladly clung to his middle,careful not to spill my drink.

We went on to talk while I was still hugging onto his middle. I kind of forgot about Jimmy. But then of course he comes strutting by with that… chick tucked under his arm.That’s my spot!

“I wanted to tell you guys congratulations,” he said with a small on his face, directed to Josh and Kirstie.

It just made me roll my eyes and take a sip of my drink. They went on to talk a little more, but I didn’t pay attention…really. It just sounded like a bunch of sucking up to me. But just when I, for some reason, looked up at him, thosebright, blue, bewitching eyes where staring back at me.

“Can we… talk?” he asked unsure of his own words.

“I rather not,” I mumbled back.

“Jimmy, lets just go,” she piped in, making me aggravated with him already.

“No… I need to talk to Kylee,” he said with a little huff to his voice. “Can we talk… Please, Kylee,” he said, actually saying the other syllable my name. Most people just call me Ky anymore. I know he’s serious when he says the other part.

But that doesn’t change anything. I don’t have anything to say to him… and he shouldn’t have anything to say to me. He’s with this chick. He has nothing to do with me. We shouldn’t even have to talk. I’m driving myself crazy with this!

“Go talk to him,” Todd softly spoke, causing me to shoot him a look.

But he just sent me a look. I knew I probably should…but I can’t get over that there’s a chick still in his arms! I eventually got up and walked to the kitchen where mostly everyone was filtered out of. I sighed and leaned against the counter while crossing my arms, refusing to look up at him. He wanted to talk… He can start this.

“How are you?” he asked quietly. Jimmy usually does talk a little softer than most people, but this was quieter than his usually tone.

“Just fine,” I simply replied.

Out of the corner of my eye, I could see him nodding his head. I still don’t see why he wanted to talk to me. I wanted to walk away from him. Just as I had willed myself too he spoke up.

“Are you and Todd…” he started, but trailed off while bringing his hand to the back of his neck.

“No… we’re friends. Not that it really concerns you or anything,” I couldn’t hold in.

“Actually it does,” he snapped, showing a little wrath in his voice.

“How? You’re my ex. What I do with my life has nothing to do with you, because you’re not in it,” I shot back. “You shouldn’t care anyway… You have someone else that’s apart of yours. Don’t worry about me, Jimmy,” I was able to get out, even through my stinging eyes.

I didn’t stay around to hear his BS of a response. I started walking away. But as I did, his voice traveled through my ears, pulling my tears past my lids.

“But I still care about you.”

That’s a bold face lie straight from the pits of hell. If he cared about me, he wouldn’t have brought that… girl with him and pranced around with her tucked under his arm. He doesn’t see me bringing some random guy with me. Even if I were with someone, I wouldn’t have brought him here out of respect for his feelings.

“Kylee…” Todd said after I had passed through the living room.

I didn’t stop. I bolted straight outside and started for Lauren’s car. I knew she had the keys so I was stuck here, but it was the only place that I could think to go to. As I drew closer to it though, I heard clunky footsteps behind me. I swear to God if that’s Jimmy…

“Are you ok?” the husky voice of Todd spoke while pulling me into a tight hug.

“No,” I cracked out while holding onto him tightly.

As he hugged back, my tears started pouring out. How could he do that to me? Bring some chick to a party and then tell me that he still cares about me. I’m tried of being hurt by him. As of right now, Jimmy Fitzpatrick is… dead to me.