Don't You Ever Fear I'm Always Near

After Kylee left I just laid on my bed and cried for a couple hours until my parents came in.

“Kirstie, Josh is here,” Dad told me.

”Why?” I shot, as I quickly sat up.

“He said his bike is leaking and he needs you to fix it,” Dad went on. “He said he went to your house but you weren’t there so he came here.”

“But I don’t want to see him,” I whined while trying to wipe away the last of my tears.

“Kirstie, I know this is hard for you,” my mom cooed while sitting next to me. “But you still are his mechanic and it’s your job to fix it.”

“I know,” I heavily sighed. “Okay, I’ll be down in a minute.”

They both went back downstairs while I pulled on some jeans and a shirt. I threw my hair up into a messy ponytail and put on some sunglasses to try to hide my puffy red eyes.

“It’s leaking?” I asked as I walked outside and found Josh leaning up against the bike with his eyes focused on his phone that was in his hands.

“Yeah,” He replied without looking at me.

“Okay. I’ll get to work,” I said while sitting down.

Josh waited for the half hour I was working on it, that wasn’t unusual. He always did that, but what was unusual is that not one word passed between us. Before we would always be talking up a storm but now it was as silent as a graveyard. The only sound that could be heard was Josh pressing the buttons on his phone and me working on the bike.

“It’s fixed,” I told him a while later.

He got up and started pushing it toward his truck. I walked near him so I could help load it into his truck because loading a 230 pound bike isn’t exactly the easiest thing in the world.

“I don’t need your help,” He coldly shot at me.

“Fine,” I pushed out before turning and walking away.

I said goodbye to my parents and went back home after that. I just hung around my house but there was something that was eating at me that night. I had to take care of it so I drove to my sisters house. Once I got there I walked around and found her and Tanner sitting on a step on her back porch.

“Hi,” I softly said.

“Hey,” She said back from her spot under Tanners arm.

“I just came to apologize for this morning,” I explained. “I’m sorry I yelled at you. I was just really emotional and hurt, and confused… I still am confused. But I still shouldn’t have gotten so upset at you and I’m sorry,” I said, lowering my gaze to my feet and biting my lower lip.

“It’s okay Kirstie,” Kylee smiled as she got up and gave me a hug.

I relaxed into our embrace and enjoyed our hug. I love my sister. We eventually parted and she took her spot next to tanner again.

“I’m sorry that it didn’t work out, I was only trying to help,” She apologized.

“That’s alright Ky, I know you were,” I replied.

“Yeah, we thought that would help you two express your feelings a little better but I guess it didn’t exactly work out,” Tanner said.

“Have you seen Josh?” Kylee asked me.

“Yes,” I groaned. “His bike was puking radiator fluid and I fixed it.”

“How did it go? Did you guys talk about it?” She prodded.

“No. It was so awkward. We barely said five words to each other,” I sighed with tears building in my eyes.

Kylee gave me a sympathetic look and patted the empty spot next to her. I sat down and she put an arm around me while I rested my head on her shoulder and cried.

“I’m so confused,” I cried. “I really like Josh but now I don’t know if we can even be friends anymore.”

Tanner then reached across Kylee’s lap and slipped his hand into mine and gently caressed it with his thumb. Tanner really is a sweet guy. I’m happy Kylee and him are dating, I think he’s a good guy and a really good guy for her. Just seeing how happy he makes her is enough for me.

“It’ll be okay Kirstie. I know you probably don’t feel like that now but it will,” Tanner tried to reassure me.

“Yeah, it will. And if it’s not we’ll make sure it is,” Kylee said while giving me a little squeeze.

I gave them a weak smile and tried to wipe away my tears. I know they were only trying to help and I’m not mad I just….wish it ended differently