Bitter Sweet Symphony

I can’t change

~~~~~~~~

“So where are you going? All you said was to be dressed very nice”

Brian just smiled at me.

“It’s a surprise”

“I really don’t like surprises. I’ve had bad experiences with surprises”

“Don’t worry. I made sure this was a good surprise”

“Alright”

We walked out the front door of my apartment complex and I stopped short for right there was a stretch white limo. When the driver saw us he opened the door for us. Brian had to pull me forward I was in so much shock. Brian thanked the limo driver and held my hand has I stepped inside and slid across the back seat so Brian could climb in after me. The driver shut the door and went over to the driver’s side. He climbed in and looked back through the partition and asked for everyone to buckle up. I did what I was told just looking around at the amazing limo I was in. Brian was seated on the opposite end of the seat so there was an empty set between us.

“Good surprise so far?”

I looked over at Brian. All I could do was nod my head yes. He smiled at me and reached over to crap a bottle of champagne that was in a bucket of ice on the little make shift bar in the limo.

“First stop Mr. Gates?”

“Yes please”

The limo started and Brian popped the top off the champagne. He poured some into two classes and held one out to me. I took it and just stared at him. This was all so new to me.

“Will you tell me where we’re going now?”

“Nope still a surprise”

“You suck”

Brian just smiled at me.

“At least I’m not an ass hole”

I just rolled my eyes and took a sip of my champagne.

“Don’t be trying to get me drunk Syn”

“I wouldn’t do that.”

“Good”

I just took another sip of my champagne and we rode in silence for a few minutes.

“So…how’s Brianna?”

“She’s good. Happy that I agreed to go on a date with you. Everyone is.”

“They just want you happy”

“I am happy…for the most part…”

Brian reached over and took my hand making me look over at him. He had the most serious look on his face has I had ever seen.

“You’ve done a great job with Brianna. She’s so well behaved and so smart.”

“She’s also sneaky and loves music”

“She has more of your personality though”

“You think?”

“Oh yeah. She’s not afraid to tell it like it is. I’m surprised she hasn’t called me an ass hole yet”

I couldn’t help but laugh.

“Well she’s not allowed to use bad words until she’s at least a teenager when she’ll be calling me that”

“Nah. You two will be tight”

“I hope so”

Brian rubbed his thumb along my hand.

“I’m not trying to change anything between you two”

“I know. It’s just hard not being the only one in her life. I was the only parent for almost 6 years. It’s just a little hard at the moment.”

“I know but I stand by what I’ve said. I wouldn’t dare take her away from you.”

“I know. Besides its Jimmy I’m worried about. I can see him running off with her any second.”

Now it was Brian’s turn to laugh.

“I know right. He’s such a kid himself”

We rode the rest of the way to stop one in silence. When the limo stopped I leaned forward to try to lean out a window to see but Brian pulled me back.

“Surprise remember?’

I just crossed my arms and grumbled, “I hate surprises”

He just laughed and took my now empty champagne glass from me and set it with his own on the bar. He opened the door and climbed out holding his hand out to help me out. I slid over and took his hand climbing out of the limo. I looked around and gasped.

“Are we going a play?”

“Yes, I heard you’re a big Wicked fan. They were performing here so I figured why not bring you for the first part of our date. I was lucky that they were having an early showing today so we can eat afterwards.”

“Wow…this is amazing Brian. I’ve never been to a play on Broadway before”

“I know. Julianna told me”

Brian linked my arm in his again and led me over to the entrance after giving instructions to the driver who nodded and went to park the limo somewhere else for the time being. We walked into the performance theater and Brian handed our tickets to be checked. An usher led us up a level or two and into a booth with a perfect view of the stage. I couldn’t help but gasp.

“Brian…this is amazing…”

“I was hoping you’d like it”

“Like it…I love it”

We sat down and waited for the show to start.

The play was wonderful and I loved every bit of it. It was amazing just being here and seeing it. I couldn’t believe it.

During intermission an usher brought us some champagne that I didn’t really drink too much of. I didn’t feel like getting very drunk tonight. Brian and I engaged in some polite conversation while we waited for the play to begin again. Mainly we were talking about Brianna. I think we were both too nervous to talk about us at the current moment in time.

When the play was over we walked out our arms linked and down a block or two to where the limo was waiting for us. Brian let me get in first and I slid over for him to come in after me. There was still a space between us be I was turned toward him this time. I was letting my guard down. I was opening myself up to loving Brain again.

I was letting my heart free.

“Second stop Mr. Gates?”

“Yes please”

“Second? Is there going to be a third?”

“Maybe. I haven’t decided yet”

“Oh…okay”

We continued talking about random things while the limo drove off. I didn’t even bother to worry about where we were going next. I was trusting Brian to not take me somewhere unsafe. He had done great with Brianna so far so I trusted him with myself.

It wasn’t long after we were stopping. Brian climbed out and helped me out of the limo once again. We were at one of the most high end restaurants in New York City. I had always dreamed of eating here.

“Wow Brian…I’ve always wanted to eat here”

“I know.”

I looked at him with a puzzled expression on my face.

“Julianna told me. She helped me plan this entire night”

“Of course she did. She’s sneaky that way”

“She’s awesome and Johnny really loves her.”

“I know he does or he wouldn’t have kept my secret for so long. He was only doing it because Julianna said for him too”

“Wow…she has him whipped”

I laughed.

“It would seem that way huh?”

Brian laughed and we walked into the restaurant. Brian walked up to the hostess stand.

“Reservation for two name Gates”

“Ah yes Mr. Gates your table is ready if you would follow me please”

Brian held out his hand for me and I took it. We followed the hostess to our table. It was a table on the second floor right along the window looking out over the city.

“This is amazing Brian”

“I was hoping you’d like it. I’m I doing well so far?”

I smiled at him, “You’re dong amazing so far”

Brian blushed a little bit and picked up the wine list and looked it over. He asked me what kind of wine I liked and we decided on one we would like together after a little bickering about tastes in wine.

What can I say I like my wine the way I like it.

The wine was brought to us and our waiter poured it into our glasses and took our appetizer order. He also filled up our water glasses.

We continued talking about nothing in particular while we waited. Once our appetizer arrived we ordered. We ate in silence.

It appears we had run out of things to talk about that didn’t concern how we were now.

Our dinner came not that much later and we started to eat when I couldn’t stand the awkward silence anymore.

“Okay the silence is killing me right now. And I’m drinking the crap out of this wine so that I’m doing something”

“Thank God it’s killing me too”

“So what do we talk about?”

“Well we’ve talked about Bree, your job, meeting bands, everyone concerned with Avenged Sevenfold, your family, everything but any details on us.”

“That’s what I thought. So…”

“So…”

“I haven’t been with anyone since you Brian”

I could see Brian hiding a smirk and looked up at me.

“I haven’t been with anyone sine you Alina”

“You’ve already told me that”

“I know just re-alliterating it. So…where’s Brianna going to school?”

“I’ve enrolled her in a private school. There’s better security for her there and some of her friends from preschool are going to be there. That’s where the majority of my money after bills and such is going. To pay for her school”

“I can help with that if you want”

I looked up at Brian and smiled.

“That would be nice. I think she’d really like that”

“And what would you like?”

“I would like that too. It would be really nice of you. Considering she has to wear a uniform too. And those aren’t cheap”

“I know. So just come up with an estimate on how much everything will cost and I’ll pay half. Sound fair?”

“Sounds perfect”

“I would like Brianna to come out and stay with me in California for a week or two later this summer. If that’s okay with you?”

“We can probably work something out. I know she’d love that. She hasn’t really been many places except a few states up or down on the East coast. She loves the beach too. You live on the beach don’t you? Or right by it?”

“Yeah I’m really close. Not that far away. And you know…you can come too”

“I don’t know. I have work here and everything”

“Why not take a vacation from all of that.”

“I was supposed to be on vacation now but a band wanted me and Roger couldn’t say no so we had to stay. I should be in Paris right now.”

Brian looked down at his plate.

Shit

“Shit I’m sorry Brian I didn’t mean it like that I just…I haven’t had a vacation in a while and I admit I was bitter when I found out I couldn’t go but Roger said I can go after you guys are gone. I’m actually glad I wasn’t able to go. It’s been awesome seeing everyone again”

Brian looked up at me.

“What about me? Are you glad to see me?”

I looked into Brian’s eyes.

“I am now”

Brian smiled and went back to eating his dinner.

We continued to eat out dinner in silence and when the waiter came and asked if we wanted dessert I jumped at the offer and ordered the most chocolate covered one they had.

Brian just laughed at me and ordered something too.

“I can’t believe you gave birth”

“What do you mean?”

“You far too good to have given birth”

“I worked out a lot after I had Bree. I wanted to lose the baby fat so I took her for a walk everyday through the park or just along the streets. I also went to the gym a few times.”

“Wow. You look good Alina. You look amazing.”

“Thank-you Brian. You don’t look so bad yourself”

When dessert came I gave a tiny squeal and started to devour it while Brian looked on laughing.

I couldn’t help it. I loved me some chocolate.

When we were done Brian paid and we walked out to meet the limo. I looked at my phone, it was now 9p.m.

“So where are we going now?”

“I’m still deciding”

“Okay…decided yet?”

Brian just looked at me with an annoyed expression.

“Stop asking me”

When the limo pulled up we climbed in and the driver turned back to Brian.

“Stop 3?”

“Actually just drive around for a little bit.”

“Yes Mr. Gates”

I looked at Brian confused.

“What was stop 3 going to be?”

Brian blushed and looked out the window.

“I admit…it was going to be my hotel. Depending on how things went I thought we could just go there and sit and talk for a while. Maybe talk about us.”

I reached out and took Brian’s hand.

“I don’t want to take things too fast. Not like last time anyway. I want to take things slow.”

Brian looked over at me. He lifted my hand and kissed it.

“So I have a chance”

“I’m strongly considering it”

Brian smiled and leaned over kissing my cheek. He pulled away and reached over to pour us some more champagne. I admit I was starting to get a nice buzz going but I was nowhere near that night 7 years ago. And I was in control.

We talked for a little while longer when I decided to unbuckle and slide over on the seat so that I was in the seat right next to his. I buckled myself up and leaned my head on his shoulder and held his hand. I just stared at the tattoos on his hand when I felt him kiss the top of my head. He laid his head on top of mine and took a deep breath.

I felt him whisper into my hair, “I’m glad you decided to come out with me today”

I smiled against his shoulder.

“I’m glad I did too”

We stayed like that for I don’t know how long before I felt his hand pulling my chin up to look at him. We stared into each other’s eyes for a few minutes before he closed the small distance between us and kissed me.

It was the most gentle, loving kiss I have ever had.

And I couldn’t help but kiss back.