God Bless the Broken Road

It has been a couple days since Eric kissed me in the field and I still don’t know how I feel. I liked him that I knew, but move in with him? I just got settled here and started to make myself a life here. Did I want to move in with him? Being away from my father sounded amazing and yes, I was going to miss Eric but I was also going to miss Marc, Jordan, and Jared. I sighed and looked out the window, remembering the way I felt the other night.

“Mackenzie?” He said my name so quietly I wasn’t even sure he really said it, but I had to look at him. When I turned around I didn’t get a chance to say anything to him because his lips where on mine and at that moment I don’t think I would have even been able to form a coherent sentence. I found myself kissing him back. When we broke apart I just sat there staring at him. “Please say something.” He pleaded after a few moments of silence.

“Why did you do that?” I asked quietly. Because at the moment that was the only thing that was running through my head. Why had he kissed me? Just to get me to move to Carolina with him?

“I’ve wanted to do that for a while now.” He admitted. “Mackenzie, I like you. I have since the night we ran into you.”

“Is that why you want me to move to Carolina with you?” Duh, Kenzie, of course that’s why he wants you to move with him. I thought to myself as I looked into his eyes.

He nodded his head and sighed. “Yes, that and because you are going to be lonely here when we leave. It would be just you and my parents because this season Heather is going with Jordan.”

I sighed and ran my hand through my hair. “Eric, can you give me some time to think about this please? Because this is all very sudden, I mean you said it yourself, we’ve only know each other for a little more than a month.”

He nodded and placed a kiss on my forehead. “Take all the time you need. I don’t leave until the end of next month.”

After that conversation we went back to the house and things felt a little awkward. I almost felt like everyone could tell that Eric kissed me out there. I excused myself from the room and went up to mine and got ready for bed even though it was only nine.

There was a knock at my door that caused me to jump because I was so caught up in my thoughts. “Come in.” I called, sitting up.

Jordan peeked his head in and smiled at me. “Hey are you okay?” He asked, taking a seat at the foot of my bed.

“Yeah Jord, I’m fine. Why would you ask?”

“Because you’ve seemed a little out of it for the past few days. What’s bothering you?”

I couldn’t help but smile. These boys have all became the big brothers I’ve always wanted and even after a month together they can tell when something in wrong with me. I scooted closer to the blond and rested my head on his shoulder and looked up at him. From this angle he looked so much larger than me, it made me feel safe.

“I’ve just been lost in thoughts lately.” I told him which wasn’t a lie.

“About what? Your dad? Because, Mackenzie, he’s not going to be bothering you again.”

I shook my head. “No, not my dad. Just about how much I’m going to miss you all when you leave next month. We have gotten so close in the time we have been together, I just don’t want to lose you.”

Jordan kissed my forehead. “Kenzie, you’re not going to lose us. We are family now, we will always be together.” He gave me a hug and that signature Staal smile. “We will miss you too, but you will see us. We are all going to want you to come to games and all that. You will become very good at traveling.” He laughed.

I hugged him back. “That sounds like a wonderful plan.” And it did. I wouldn’t mind traveling the states to see my boys play. “Thanks Jordan, I’m glad I can talk to you about these things.”

“Any time, you are like my sister now. If you ever need anything and I’m not around do not hesitate to call me. I will always be here for you. We all will. Now, we are going to lunch and you are coming with us.” He said, pulling me to my feet. “You have five minutes to get ready or we are leaving without you.”

I laughed and pushed him out of my room and pulled out my sundress. Fifteen minutes later I was squished in the back seat of the SUV along with Eric, Heather, and Jared. Lunch was a normal even with all the kids, Marc and Jared tried to start a food fight, Jordan and I had a staring contest, and Eric just sat there laughing at us all. Nothing was awkward today Eric between and I which was nice because I liked the way things were. But maybe I could like things a different way if it wasn’t awkward. Once we finished lunch, we decided to go get some ice cream.

“Mackenzie!” Marc yelled from down the table at the ice cream parlor. It was any wonder we didn’t get kicked out of places.

“Marc!” I answered back with a laugh.

“You’re coming to New York with me right?” He asked and I chocked on the spoonful of ice cream I had just eaten. Oh God, not this again. I sneaked a look at Eric and I saw him glaring at Marc, but Marc didn’t notice. Heather did though.

“Um, I don’t know.” I answered quietly. “Why would I go there with you?” I asked, trying to lighten a what now seemed tense mood.

“To live with me, duh.” He rolled his eyes like it was obvious.

I groaned, why did they have to do this to me? Why were they going to make me chose between them? “Um, I don’t know Marc. Give me some time to think about it, kay?”

He nodded and went back to his sundae and talking to Jared. I looked around the table and noticed someone was missing. Eric. I looked around and saw him standing outside, leaning against the wall.

“I’ll be right back guys.” I said before getting up. I walked outside and over to Eric. I placed a hand on his arm.

“Do you know how badly I wanted to punch him right then?” He said quietly without even looking at me.

My heart was pounding in my chest and I was pretty sure Eric could hear it. “Eric.” I said, stepping in front of him. “What was I supposed to say? It’s not like I told you yes.”

He didn’t say anything, we just stood there staring at each other. “I want you to say yes.” He whispered as he took a step closer to me. I tried to look away from him, but he placed his hand on my cheek making me look at him. “I want you to come live with me.” He said right before he kissed me.

I didn’t fight him or myself. I knew I wanted this, to kiss him again. I stood up on my tip toes and wrapped my arms around his neck and deepened the kiss. Eric responded by pulling me closer to him as his tongue begged for entrance, which I granted. Finally we broke apart, both of us breathing heavily.

“Please say yes?” He asked quietly.

I closed my eyes and sighed. I suddenly felt the urge to cry. “I don’t know Eric, please I need more time. Especially now that Marc asked me.”

Eric growled. “Forget Marc.”

“No, he’s my friend too. He asked, I have to at least think about it. Who knows, Jordan could ask me tomorrow.”

“He wouldn’t, Heather is going with him.”

“And what I couldn’t go then? It’s not like Heather and I hate each other.”

Eric sighed. “Just think about it?” He asked before placing another kiss to my lips and turning to go back inside the ice cream parlor, leaving me alone outside. With a loud sigh I slid to the ground and leaned against the wall.

What was I going to do? Both Eric and Marc wanted me to move with them. Eric had feelings for me. Marc and I got along really well, that relationship was totally brother/sister. I was so confused, I didn’t know what to do. I wrapped my hands around my locket and looked up to the sky with tears in my eyes.

“Mom, if I ever needed you more than ever, it’s now. I need help.” I said.

I made way back inside and sat down next to Heather. “Are you okay?” She whispered.

“Yeah I’m fine. Just needed sometime to think.”

“Come over tonight. I think you need a girls’ night.”

I smiled, that was exactly what I needed. “That sounds great.”

When we got back to the farm, we decided to have a shootout contest and the winner got to pick the movie we would watch. Jared ended up winning and picked Saving Private Ryan much to Eric and Jordan’s excitement. Before the movie started I ran upstairs to change out of my dress and put some shorts and a shirt on. When I came back down, Henry and Linda had joined us and the only spot that was open was between Marc and Eric. Without thinking about it, I jumped in between them and settled to watch the movie.

Throughout the movie, Eric would place his hand on my leg and Marc had his arm around my shoulders. God, I really hope they both didn’t have feelings for more. It was hard enough with just Eric. I decided that I wasn’t going to worry about it too much, I just wanted to have a good time.

Later that night Heather and I went to her place and had our girls’ night.

“So spill. What the hell is going on with all of this?” She said when we were laying in her bed.

I sighed and sat up, crossing my legs and she followed. “I don’t what’s going on. The other night when Eric took me out to dinner he kissed me and asked me to move to Carolina with him. Then today Marc asked me to move to New York with him.” I sighed, the urge to cry back. “Heather, what am I supposed to do? I don’t want to hurt them.”

“Well this is a bit of a problem. First off, do you like Eric?”

I bit my lip and nodded. “I do and that makes me want to go with him, but I want to stay here as well.”

“Here’s what you can do. Tell both of them that you are just going to stay here for the time being. You like it here and want to stay and help out Henry and Linda. They will start traveling to watch the boys play and I know the boys are going to fly you out to them, so you’ll see them.”

“Heather, that actually sounds like a good idea. How come I didn’t think of that?” I asked, dumbstruck.

“Because you are too caught up in the emotions. You just needed to take a step back and observe from a different point of view.” She paused. “Speaking of observing from different points of view.” I could hear the smile in her voice. “That was some kiss you and Eric shared outside of the ice cream parlor today.”

I blushed and covered my face. “Oh God, you saw that?”

“I did, but only because I was looking for you because your cell phone had gone off. I must say, you guys will make a very cute couple.”

“I really do like him. I think out of all the boys, I’m going to miss him the most.”

“Totally understandable.”

“Thanks for helping me understand what’s going on with everything.”

“No problem, I’m just glad I can help.”

We continued to talk and have a great time before we both fell asleep. Before going to sleep I sent a text to both Eric and Marc.

I have an answer for you. I’ll tell ya tomorrow

I turned my phone off before I could get a response and fell asleep. Tomorrow was probably going to be a hard day.