Unsaid Things

“Harold Mark Christopher Judd.” My tone was rather strong, but the look on my face was evidence enough that I was just fooling around. My voice squeaked a little as he shot me a glare at the use of his middle names. “Can I trust you?” I asked him, holding Lilly in my arms tightly. He had only met her a few hours before and I was really hoping she’ll be okay. Don’t get me wrong, Tom was going to watch over her too; but somehow, I trusted Tom more than him. He rolled his eyes.
“Tom will be here too. She will be fine.” Harry muttered, rolling his eyes dramatically. I turned I placed Lilly on the ground and crouched down, smiling softly at her.
“Be good, princess. Mummy is just going out for a little while. I’ll be home before you know it. Listen to Uncle Tom and Uncle Harry. Okay sweetie?” I whispered, kissing her cheek. She grinned in happiness before hobbling over to Tom and wrapping her arms around his leg. He let out a large laugh and I smiled softly.
“Now go have fun. You need a baby free night.” Harry muttered, pushing me out the door behind Rachel, Dougie, and Danny. I turned and raised an eyebrow. “I promise she will be fine. If anything goes wrong, I’ll call you ASAP.” He reasoned, closing the door behind me. I turned to the group and raised an eyebrow. They had offered to take me out to clubs as a welcome back party. I’m pretty sure Rachel mentioned it because she knew that I have been tied to my baby ever since she was born.
“Are you sure it wont be awkward with Danny there?” she whispered, and I shook my head with a smile.
“Nah, we talked everything out. I think things should be back to old times.” I nodded, turning to Danny as he sent me a soft smile. Dougie ran toward the car, bouncing up and down as if he were on something. I let out a laugh as I unlocked the doors. Somehow, I agreed on driving since I told them I wasn’t having anything to drink. Rachel got in beside me and the two boys got in the back, sitting on either side of the baby seat. The ride to Marc Anthony Bar wasn’t very eventful; Rachel and Dougie just shared a conversation over the music.
“I love this place.” Dougie breathed, pulling Rachel into the small pub. I followed with a laugh, Danny right ahead of me as we walked in between everyone. We made a human snake so we wouldn’t get pulled apart, and I stayed hold of Danny’s hood with all of my might. The VIP section was empty, and so we took advantage. I sat on the end beside Rachel, who had Dougie beside her, and then Danny on the end opposite of the table as me. We each told Danny what we wanted to drink and he disappeared in the crowd again.
“Lilly seems like a mommy’s girl.” Rachel muttered, making small talk. I nodded slowly, shaking my head with a laugh.
“She doesn’t like Damien very much, for some reason.” I nodded, and she let out a laugh with a roll of her eyes. It was hard to hear over the sound of the pub, so I leaned closer as I knew that Rachel was going to say something back.
“That makes the two of us.” I glared at her lightly and sighed. Ever since I had gotten here a few hours before, she kept making remarks about Damien; how much she didn’t like him. I scoffed lightly.
“Rachel, stop. I know you don’t like him, but we’re getting married. You have to warm up to him eventually.” I muttered, looking down at the engagement ring on my finger. Right as I had said we were getting married, Danny had shown back up again and had taken a seat. He handed me my water with a raise of an eyebrow.
“Married? Who?” Danny asked in mere wonder. Rachel laughed and took her drink, smiling at Dougie as he clanked their glasses together.
“Damien and I.” I nodded, and Danny looked rather confused. I don’t really remember if I had actually told him that it was the person who raped me’s name, but I could tell it clicked as his eyes grew wide. I had run right out of his life one year ago to be with the man that hurt me the most. His eyes flashed with anger for just one second, before he smiled sincerely.
“Oh, good for you.” He nodded, before taking a large swig of his beer. Rachel leaned on the table and turned to me with a sigh.
“Niccy. He’s no good for you. I know I sound like a broken record, but I’m serious. He hurt you. Bad. How could you just walk back into his life and figure everything was going to be okay?” she asked, and I rolled my eyes before turning to the large crowd on the dance floor. “You gave up your happiness here to be across the country and live with that asshole who fucked you over. I know that Lilly is your new found happiness, but do you remember before her? You could be raising her with us, and you could be in a relationship with someone else. Someone better.” I turned as she flickered her eyes toward Danny and that made a tear escape my watery eyes.
“Damien and I are meant to be. He told me so. I’m sick of you talking shit about him all of the time! I love him, and he loves me.” I shouted, though it was barely above talking noise because of how loud this club was getting. I stood up from the table.
“Niccy, sit down. I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to freak. Just…let’s have fun. Forget I ever said anything.” And she was right, I did have fun. A few hours flew by like a blink of an eye and I was far over drunk; Rachel and Dougie too. Danny had only a half of a beer considering right after me and Rachel’s argument, I ordered a set of shots. I was far over drunk and everyone knew it.
“I love you, Rachy-poo!” I cooed, leaning on Rachel with a grin. I hopped out of my seat as my favorite song came on. Danny laughed loudly and shook his head at me. Suddenly a guy appeared beside me and I smiled flirty at him. “Why hello there.” I muttered, and he smiled at me with a wink. Danny got up at that moment and told the guy to leave, causing me to look at him dumbfound. “What the hell, Daniel! I was talkin’ to that guyyy!” I sputtered, letting out a loud laugh afterwards.
“Yeah, you are also getting married.” He added, and I scowled at him, crossing my arms over my chest. He pulled me out of the pub, Rachel and Dougie behind us as we made our way down the street.
“Lets get some popcorn!” Dougie exclaimed, holding Rachel’s hand as he pulled her down the sidewalk.
“Dougs! Its 2 am, where are you going to find popcorn?” Danny called after him, but they were already too far gone to have even heard him. He turned to me as I leaned on the brick wall, taking a deep breath as I tried to clear my head. I giggled at him and he just laughed. “You alright?”
“I love you.” I slurred, leaning my head to the side as I let out another laugh. His eyes grew wide, and I just threw my arm at him, laughing loudly again. “You are my b-best friend.” I nodded, and his eyes slowly went back to normal size. He nodded slowly. Dougie appeared back beside us with Rachel on his hip and popcorn in his hand. My eyes felt like they were going to bug out of my eyes as I stared at it. “Where in the fuck did you get thattt! Gimme!” I shouted, taking a handful.
“It tastes great with beer!” Dougie exclaimed, taking a large gulp out of the deer in his hands before popping popcorn in his mouth.
“Oh! Lets go to the park!” Rachel exclaimed, hugging me as she tried to walk in the opposite direction. Danny guided us the other way and we made out way, Dougie trailing behind as he drank. “We can play on the swings, and play tag, oh and slide down the slide!” Rachel explained to me, and I nodded with a grin. My drunken mind was only hearing ‘blah blah blah’ but I nodded for her sake.
We made it to the park and I felt as if I had sobered up a bit, but that didn’t stop Rachel from pulling me toward the large slide. I followed in toe, watching her slide down on her stomach. I jumped down it when she reached the bottom and it caused me to get a little lightheaded. I took a seat beside Danny on the bench as Dougie and Rachel ran around like children during recess.
“So…you’re marrying Damien, huh?” Danny asked, and I turned to him with my eyes blinking every few sentence. I giggled, before nodding. I’m never usually drunk, but when I am, I’m hard to handle.
“Yeah! I mean, Rachel keeps…keeps telling me that…he’s no good to me. But he gave me Lilly!” I exclaimed, clapping my hands excitedly.
“But…Niccy…he raped you and…got you pregnant. I know you love Lilly with all of your heart, but he hurt you and you just went crawling back to him.” Danny whispered, and I looked down slowly. I felt as if I had sobered up but I felt my mind race as I felt anger take over.
“Stop, Danny. I love him and he…he loves me-” he cut me off with a sigh.
“When was the last time he told you he loved you?” he asked, and I was about to answer before he spoke again. “No ‘love you’ shit or anything like that.” I looked down with a sigh as I knew that he only said love you when we were saying goodbye, and not ‘I love you’, just ‘love you’. “Exactly. Why are you doing this to yourself?” he whispered, and I stood from the bench with a grunt.
“Because he is the only guy that I know that won’t sleep with the next girl he sees.” I exclaimed, turning my back to him as I ran over to Rachel. She was playing tag with Dougie, causing me to smile lightly, every angered piece of my body completely vanishing.