Don't Want to Start a Fight

[Jack]

I was woken up by the sound of my phone buzzing. You may be thinking, surely you can ignore a buzzing phone?, but no. My cellphone buzzing is brutal. Like a chainsaw. So with a groan, I grabbed it and flipped it open to shut it up. There, much better.

“Mm, go back to sleep,” Alex grumbled, squeezing his arms tighter around my waist, his bare chest pressing against my bare back.

No, we didn’t do anything. I just like to cuddle when I sleep and Alex stayed over last night – and both of us only sleep in boxers. Huh…that might look odd from the outside…but I swear it’s nothing. We’re cuddlers!

“I should probably check it. No-one would text me before midday if it wasn’t important,” I yawned, moving my phone closer to my face.

“Well roll on your back so I can read too!” Alex pouted, nipping the back of my neck.

Nosy shit. But I did it anyway. The text it from Pat. Hmm.

John and Kyle broke up. Badly. Shit just got real.

“What the fuck?!” I gasped.

“Oh my god. Oh my fucking god! Shit, I didn’t think he’d actually listen to me!” Alex groaned, letting go of me as he ran his hands through his bed hair.

As Alex checked his phone – he had the text too – my jaw dropped slightly. What did Alex do?!

“W-What?” I whimpered, rolling on my side so I could face him.

Alex smiled sheepishly at me, propping his head up with his hand.

“I went to see Kyle yesterday, to talk to him about how badly he treated you at the party,”

Alex paused as my eyes pricked with tears, and raised his hand to cup my face, stroking his thumb across my cheek gently. If Alex and I weren’t as close as we are, he probably would be my perfect boyfriend. But, we’re way too much like brothers to ever date. Anyway.

“I told him how disgusted we all are with his actions, and that he’s pretty much lost us. Ah, don’t protest, you know it’s true. As much as we hate to lose anyone, we would lose Kyle over this because using you like that is not right. And I told him that he needed to tell John. Then Kyle said if he broke up with John, would we still speak to him. I said that I wasn’t telling him to break up with John, because it’s his own life. He had to make his own choice, and just follow his heart. I guess his heart said that being with John wasn’t what he wanted any more,” Alex finished.

“Y-You told him he’d lose all his friends? Y-You know I w-would never abandon him! You kn-know that!” I choked, my eyes wide in shock.

How could Alex say that to Kyle? I would never leave Kyle alone! Never!

“I was angry about what he did, Jack! As are Rian, Caleb and Zack. Pat’s really upset about the whole thing, so he would’ve stayed neutral, but I know that a single word from you would’ve made Rian, Caleb and Zack easily block out Kyle. You know how protective those guys are. And you’re my best friend, Jack. How could I ever let you be hurt like that?” Alex said seriously.

My bottom lip trembled, threatening an outbreak of tears, which made Alex sigh softly and capture my lips with his in a gentle kiss. When I had calmed down enough, Alex pulled away, smiling reassuringly. I smiled back tentatively, making him laugh and roll out of my bed. Only Alex can calm me down with a friendly kiss like that. I bet Kyle could too.

“Well don’t just lie there – come on!” Alex urged, pulling on his jeans from yesterday.

“Where are we going?” I frowned, but sat up.

“To Pat’s. Duh,” Alex shrugged.

I bit my bottom lip as Alex rooted around in my t-shirt drawer for something to wear. Was I ready to see Kyle after only two days since the…incident? Would I really be able to forgive him so easily? Would I really be able to look at his face without crying too? Of course you would, dumbass. Alex pulled on an old Blink 182 shirt, and sighed when he noticed I still hadn’t moved.

“Jack, come on. You know you want to see him again. You know that the only way the two of you will heal is by talking it over. Take the first step, Jacky,” Alex said softly.

“I-I don’t know if I can,” I whispered.

“You won’t know until you try,” Alex replied simply.

*

“Well I wasn’t expecting you to be here too,” Pat commented, opening the door to Alex and I.

“I’m not really sure if I can be here,” I said softly, stuffing my hands into my pockets.

Pat sighed, but nodded his understanding, and lead us up to his bedroom.

“He’s in here with Rian. I picked him up from John’s yesterday afternoon when John texted Tim a vague unhelpful text, and he pretty much slept right through until an hour before I texted you guys. When he woke up I got Rian to come over, and as soon as he saw Rian he started crying and mumbling about us not talking to him again and stuff like that. When we finally got it out of him what really happened in the break-up, Kyle went hysterical. We haven’t been able to get him to calm down at all,” Pat explained sadly.

“Then I really don’t think me being here will help,” I muttered.

“Right now, I’m willing to try anything,” Pat said with a weak smile.

Alex sent me a firm glare, to which I sighed and nodded. The thought of Kyle being hysterically upset makes me upset, even after what he did to me. So I guess I should try to help, right? I inhaled sharply as Pat slowly opened his bedroom door, Alex and I walking in before he shut it again. The first thing that hit me was the sound of Kyle’s broken sobbing. Tears stung in my eyes as I saw Rian sitting upright on Pat’s bed, Kyle curled up like a kitten in his arms. Rian was rocking them back and forth, but Kyle wasn’t calming down. At all.

“Kyle, ssh. Alex and Jack are here,” Pat said softly.

Kyle’s head shot up, his eyes wide and blood-shot, making me wince.

“J-Jack?” Kyle whimpered.

I swallowed heavily before looking at him.

“Hey,” I said hesitantly, forcing a weak smile.

I froze as Kyle wormed his way out of Rian’s arms and ran over to me, but opened my arms regardless as he jumped. Kyle automatically wrapped his legs round my waist and arms round my neck, sobbing all over again as he buried his face against my throat. I hesitantly wrapped my arms around him, which only made Kyle whimper and hold me tighter.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry,”

Kyle repeated this over and over and over, only making tears fall down my cheeks too. As I sat Kyle and I down on the floor, Alex, Pat and Rian sat down on Pat’s bed, making me roll my eyes slightly but raise my hand to stroke Kyle’s hair…then I froze.

“Why the fuck is there a massive lump on the back on your head?” I hissed.

“J-John di…”

Kyle couldn’t finish the sentence, resuming his sobbing, but I’d heard all I needed to know. John fucking hurt him! How dare he hurt Kyle! Pat, Alex and Rian sent each other shocked glances at my anger, before Pat cleared his throat.

“When Kyle told John what the two of you did…John pushed Kyle and Kyle stumbled backwards and hit his head on John’s desk,” Pat explained softly.

“I’m going to fucking kill him,” I growled, holding Kyle tighter.

No-one hurts my Kyle.

“Don’t. John already got hysterical when Tim and I got to his, and Tim even punched him in the jaw for pushing Kyle. Sure, Tim apologized and gave him a man-hug straight after, but it’s been dealt with,” Pat reassured me.

“Still doesn’t change the fact he shouldn’t have hurt Kyle,” I muttered.

Everyone fell silent, allowing me to close my eyes and focus on calming Kyle down, holding him tightly and whispering reassuring words. It took about half an hour to get Kyle to stop sobbing, and then another twenty minutes to get Kyle to stop crying. When he’d finally composed himself, Kyle lifted his head and looked up at me shyly, nervously almost.

“You’re such an idiot, Kyle,” I sighed, pushing his fringe out of his eyes.

“I know,” Kyle said sadly, his bottom lip starting to tremble again.

“Hey, ssh, calm down. No more tears…you promised!” I cooed, brushing my thumb over his lip.

I was surprised when Kyle pressed the tiniest of kisses to my thumb, but didn’t let it show on my face. Those three don’t need to know that happened.

“I can’t bear the thought of you hating me, Jack. I-I shouldn’t have used you at the party, and I-I wish you would forgive me,” Kyle whispered, his hands moving to clutch at my t-shirt.

“I could never hate you Kyle. Never,” I mumbled with a weak smile.

“S-So you’re not going to leave me? You’re going to st-stay?” Kyle choked, his eyes wide with hope.

I smiled and nodded, making Kyle bury his face in my neck once more.

“I’m not going anywhere,” I said softly.

*

It’s been about another half an hour since Kyle had calmed down. Zack and Caleb got here not long after that and we were all still in Pat’s room. Kyle was still sitting in my lap on the floor, but he was facing the rest of our friends now, even though his hands were still bunched in my t-shirt and his head was leaning in the crook of my neck. Caleb was in the bathroom down the hall right now and the rest of us were talking. Well, Kyle and I stayed pretty much silent, my fingers tracing patterns into Kyle’s hips, but it was nice. Just…peaceful, like everything used to be.

Then my phone buzzed, and I flipped it open to see a text from Caleb. What the fuck?

Come out into the corridor, I need to talk to you.

What the hell does he want? I guess I should go see really. With a sigh I started to get up, only for Kyle to look up at me in panic.

“W-Where are you going?” he demanded, making everyone laugh.

Bless him.

“Relax, I’m just going to the bathroom. I’ll be back, Kyle,” I chuckled.

“B-But…”

“I need to piss. I will be back. Go sit on Rian or something,” I interrupted.

Kyle pouted and made grabby hands at me as I moved him off my lap and onto the floor beside me, chuckling as I walked out of the room. Kyle would last for a few minutes, I’m sure of that.

“Caleb?” I hissed, not wanting anyone else to hear.

Caleb poked his head out of the bathroom door, and beckoned me towards him. With an amused expression on my face I walked into the bathroom, shutting the door behind me.

“So…what’s up?” I asked, sitting down on the edge of the bath.

“I need to tell you why Kyle did what he did,” Caleb said urgently

“What do you mean? He was just horny,” I frowned.

“No, he wasn’t. Fuck, I shouldn’t be telling you this, but you need to know why he reacted so freaked out afterwards too,” Caleb insisted.

Uh, okay? I nodded hesitantly, so Caleb sat down next to me, wringing his hands together.

“About two years ago I was sleeping over Kyle’s and we got really drunk. I mentioned your name, just mid-sentence, and he suddenly spilled all these gut-wrenching feelings about you. When I confronted him the next morning about it, he burst into tears and begged me not to tell anyone. He pretty much loves you, Jack. John was only a guy to get over you, and I thought it had worked because Kyle loved him, but I guess John wasn’t enough. He fucking loves you. That’s why he freaked out – because he acted on something he’s kept secret for so long,” Caleb rambled.

I felt like my world had stopped moving as I heard Caleb’s words. Kyle….l-loves me? But that can’t be true! It can’t! Caleb saw my distress and ran his fingers through his hair before looking at me again.

“Look, I only told you because I felt you needed to know. Kyle’s liked you ever since he first saw you in Freshman year, so don’t crush him even more than he already is. Without you he’s lost. I don’t care if you don’t ever act on his feelings, but don’t hurt him. Please,” Caleb begged.

I choked a laugh, sniffing back tears I didn’t know were there.

“I could never hurt him. I fell in love with him about a year ago, only realizing that the happy butterflies in my stomach that I got whenever Kyle smiled at me or hugged me or kissed my cheek were because I liked him. Alex is the only one that knows and that was only recently. Pretty ironic that I was psyching myself up to tell him how I felt the week he and John got to together, huh?”

“You like him too?” Caleb asked excitedly.

“No,” I muttered, making Caleb’s face fall, “I love him too,”

Caleb grinned but I quickly shook my head to get rid of any of his stupid ideas.

“But why won’t you say anything? This is perfect! John’s out the way now and you two can finally be happy!” Caleb exasperated.

“Because Kyle freaked out about…what we did, so he’s obviously not ready for anything between us. Besides, he’s only just broken up with John, he needs time to get over that,” I said softly.

“Fuck, you’re too good, Jack. Anyone else would just jump right in there,” Caleb chuckled.

“Good thing I’m not anyone else then, huh?” I said with a weak smile.

We fell into silence for a few seconds, just thinking over the revelations that have come out all of a sudden. I can’t believe I told Caleb how I feel for Kyle. I’ve done so well keeping it a secret! Now both Alex and Caleb know! I just hope that Caleb keeps his gossip mouth shut. He can barely keep a secret quiet normally, but I’m hoping he’ll keep silent about this like he has about Kyle. Well, until now anyway. But that’s not the point.

“Just promise me that you’ll think about being with him? I can’t stand seeing both of you as hurt as you have been over the last few days,” Caleb said seriously.

“Yeah, I’ll think about it. Fuck, I never thought he’d actually like me back,” I sighed, rubbing the back of my neck awkwardly.

“Please don’t act any differently around him now you know? You were the only one to stop him being hysterical and I know he’d go off again if you acted weird,” Caleb pleaded.

“I promise, as long as you promise not to tell anyone either,” I said firmly.

Caleb bit his bottom lip but nodded. I breathed a sigh of relief and stood up, Caleb doing the same, and the two of us returned to Pat’s bedroom. I smiled at the sight of Kyle on Rian’s lap, laughing as he made grabby hands at me again. Fuck, what Caleb just told me makes all the difference, it really does. I sat down on the floor and patted my lap, Kyle immediately leaving Rian and sitting on me instead.

“Oh sure, leave me for the lanky one,” Rian playfully grumbled.

“He smells better than you,” Kyle retorted, poking his tongue out.

Everyone laughed at the banter, ecstatic that Kyle was returning to his old self so quickly.

“Where were you two then?” Zack asked Caleb and I curiously.

“Damn, he caught us Jack,” Caleb said dramatically, holding his hand to his heart.

“I told you we should’ve waited for our bathroom rendezvous,” I mockingly sighed.

“But hot passionate butt-fucking isn’t fun at our houses,” Caleb pouted.

Caleb and I looked at each other, before bursting into laughter along with Zack, Pat, Rian and Alex. Caleb and Rian are the only two straight guys in the group, so obviously this was all a lie. But Kyle tugged at my t-shirt, looking up at me with a frown on his face.

“Y-You weren’t really fucking Caleb, were you?” he whispered.

I bit my lip at his worry to hide my smile, and shook my head.

“I would never fuck Caleb. One, because he’s straight. And two…because I like someone else,” I whispered back.

I felt my heart rapidly speed up as those words left my lips, but I couldn’t take them back now. Hopefully Kyle won’t figure out that I meant him.

“O-Okay,” Kyle replied softly, returning to face the rest of our friends.

I should’ve known this was the start of all the chaos.