World So Cold
Wanted
Changing into a panther, I dropped down onto the ground and took off into the woods after Damon. I chased his aura, sensing him. As I caught up to him I launched myself into the air and jumped at his back. As he went down I tried to bite his throat.
He recovered quickly though and rolled over, throwing me off him. I snarled baring my teeth and lunged for him again. It was harder now that he knew it was coming and he merely grabbed me in mid-air and threw me into a tree.
Changing back into a vampire I went at him again, blind with rage. This time he grabbed me and held me against a tree. I struggled to get out his grasp and I could tell he was holding me down with some effort.
My fangs were extended as I tried to bite him and my hands had become claws, desperately trying to tear skin. “Enough,” said Damon, picking me up and slamming me into the tree. I stopped struggling but I still snarled at him. “What are you doing here?” he asked.
I was going to find you, I sent telepathically, to enraged to speak. I managed to get a hand free and swung at him. But Damon caught it before I could make contact and forced it back down to my side.
“You need to stop,” he growled.
You fed from her, I accused. You took her blood.
“Yes, I did,” he said simply. The casualness with which he said it enraged me further. So much that I felt like I was going to explode. I was like an animal trying to claw him, bite him, anything to cause damage.
“Stop it,” he said angrily tightening his hold on me. If I had been human I wouldn’t be able to breathe. I stopped my struggles but glared at him with as much hate as I could muster. “Now I’m going to let go of you. Don’t do anything stupid.”
He slowly released his grip from me and took a step away. Immediately, as quick as a snake, I lashed out and managed to strike him across his cheek. His head snapped to the side as I lowered my hand back down. “That was stupid,” he said turning back to look at me. “Incredibly stupid.”
“What are you going to do to me?” I asked practically yelling at him. “Are you going to kill me? You’ve already done that once.” For an instant I saw his façade crumble and I saw him flinch. All the fight and anger just suddenly seemed to drain out of me. I was left feeling tired and weak. “That’s what this is about,” I whispered.
Damon didn’t say anything but simply watched me. An impassive expression on his face. “You still can’t stand the fact that you killed me. Even if you don’t remember, you don’t want it to happen again.” The fact that he didn’t say anything was enough for me. I knew I was right. “Damon, you don’t have to worry about that.”
“Don’t I?” he said raising an eyebrow. “You don’t understand the power you hold. Not just the one running through your veins.” I watched as his eyes traveled to my neck before snapping back to me. “It’s not just your blood I want.”
“Oh,” I said surprised. I couldn’t imagine Damon wanting anything other than that. In my head I still saw Damon as something evil. He was still a monster to me. But slowly that was falling apart. I was seeing a softer Damon. One I hadn’t seen before.
“You don’t understand the amount of control it takes for me to even be near you. I can’t stand it. I can’t stand to be near you.” He looked at me with sad, hungry eyes. He wanted something he was determined not to let himself have. His words from the last night I saw him came back to my mind. What we want and what we deserve are two different things.
“Damon,” I said and reached out to him. He pulled away quickly. I watched with tears in my eyes as Damon moved farther away from me.
“Just stay away,” he said before running off into the woods. I wanted to follow him but I felt too hollow to do so. His face haunted me that whole night. The defeat in his eyes. And it was in that same spot that Stefan found me the next morning.
He recovered quickly though and rolled over, throwing me off him. I snarled baring my teeth and lunged for him again. It was harder now that he knew it was coming and he merely grabbed me in mid-air and threw me into a tree.
Changing back into a vampire I went at him again, blind with rage. This time he grabbed me and held me against a tree. I struggled to get out his grasp and I could tell he was holding me down with some effort.
My fangs were extended as I tried to bite him and my hands had become claws, desperately trying to tear skin. “Enough,” said Damon, picking me up and slamming me into the tree. I stopped struggling but I still snarled at him. “What are you doing here?” he asked.
I was going to find you, I sent telepathically, to enraged to speak. I managed to get a hand free and swung at him. But Damon caught it before I could make contact and forced it back down to my side.
“You need to stop,” he growled.
You fed from her, I accused. You took her blood.
“Yes, I did,” he said simply. The casualness with which he said it enraged me further. So much that I felt like I was going to explode. I was like an animal trying to claw him, bite him, anything to cause damage.
“Stop it,” he said angrily tightening his hold on me. If I had been human I wouldn’t be able to breathe. I stopped my struggles but glared at him with as much hate as I could muster. “Now I’m going to let go of you. Don’t do anything stupid.”
He slowly released his grip from me and took a step away. Immediately, as quick as a snake, I lashed out and managed to strike him across his cheek. His head snapped to the side as I lowered my hand back down. “That was stupid,” he said turning back to look at me. “Incredibly stupid.”
“What are you going to do to me?” I asked practically yelling at him. “Are you going to kill me? You’ve already done that once.” For an instant I saw his façade crumble and I saw him flinch. All the fight and anger just suddenly seemed to drain out of me. I was left feeling tired and weak. “That’s what this is about,” I whispered.
Damon didn’t say anything but simply watched me. An impassive expression on his face. “You still can’t stand the fact that you killed me. Even if you don’t remember, you don’t want it to happen again.” The fact that he didn’t say anything was enough for me. I knew I was right. “Damon, you don’t have to worry about that.”
“Don’t I?” he said raising an eyebrow. “You don’t understand the power you hold. Not just the one running through your veins.” I watched as his eyes traveled to my neck before snapping back to me. “It’s not just your blood I want.”
“Oh,” I said surprised. I couldn’t imagine Damon wanting anything other than that. In my head I still saw Damon as something evil. He was still a monster to me. But slowly that was falling apart. I was seeing a softer Damon. One I hadn’t seen before.
“You don’t understand the amount of control it takes for me to even be near you. I can’t stand it. I can’t stand to be near you.” He looked at me with sad, hungry eyes. He wanted something he was determined not to let himself have. His words from the last night I saw him came back to my mind. What we want and what we deserve are two different things.
“Damon,” I said and reached out to him. He pulled away quickly. I watched with tears in my eyes as Damon moved farther away from me.
“Just stay away,” he said before running off into the woods. I wanted to follow him but I felt too hollow to do so. His face haunted me that whole night. The defeat in his eyes. And it was in that same spot that Stefan found me the next morning.
♠ ♠ ♠
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