Watch You Cry
O 1 1
Maybe it's selfish. Maybe it's inconsiderate.
It's like the question of hurting someone you don't know in order to save the ones you love.
The immensity of love I have for my mother is immeasurable. I want her to be happy. I need it.
To see her as a shell of a person is the most devestating thing to witness and the realization that maybe she's just a mirror-image of myself makes my stomach drop into depths of hurt.
I am being selfish.
Why should I waste her happiness? I'm still here. She can still be happy, and then maybe she can stay happy.
Hurting people is a fear among no other. My senses shudder at the reality of my situation. I don't want people to remember me. I wish there was no burden of Declan Slade.
For now, it's happiness.
Not mine, of course.
Never mine.
It's like the question of hurting someone you don't know in order to save the ones you love.
The immensity of love I have for my mother is immeasurable. I want her to be happy. I need it.
To see her as a shell of a person is the most devestating thing to witness and the realization that maybe she's just a mirror-image of myself makes my stomach drop into depths of hurt.
I am being selfish.
Why should I waste her happiness? I'm still here. She can still be happy, and then maybe she can stay happy.
Hurting people is a fear among no other. My senses shudder at the reality of my situation. I don't want people to remember me. I wish there was no burden of Declan Slade.
For now, it's happiness.
Not mine, of course.
Never mine.
♠ ♠ ♠
It's sooo rough. I'm not sure if I approached this chapter well. I have the next one written up so maybe I'll post it in an hour or so. The excuse for my absence is sadly a mixture of school, my social life and work. Apparently when you enter your final years of school, you only have time for so much.