Kiss My Ass

Alex was not his usual talkative self, and it was clear why. It didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out that he was feeling just as uncomfortable as Lyle—or, well, as uncomfortable as he hoped she was feeling, too. He couldn’t read her anymore, not the same way that he used to, and he couldn’t help but feel annoyed by that.

He watched her at the sound board, following Matt’s instructions and throwing in a few ideas of her own (because that’s just the way she was). He watched as she joked around with Zack over the mic, sending some suggestions for improvement and general compliments. And when she smiled, he couldn’t help but feel a little bit angry. She seemed to be getting along with everyone else just fine.

Except for him.

She was talking with Zack like nothing ever happened. Hell, she had even hugged Erika. And, well, Jack was Jack and he seemed to be severely unaffected by everything. She was even still buddy-buddy with Rian, briefly talking about old times and old jokes when it was appropriate.

But not with Alex.

And part of him could understand why. If he thought about it, and he did often, it was all him. Jack had never done anything, and neither had Erika; they were the two that wanted to give her a shot. Alex didn’t. Rian was the one who wanted her to explain herself because he was never the type to blindly believe rumors. Alex had been; he blindly believed t and that caused the most important relationship he had ever had to fall apart. And Zack? Well, Zack went to an entirely different school; two months after the first rumor, even everyone at Towson knew what was going on. And Alex was loathe to admit that, okay, that might’ve been his fault.

Looking back, he had been nothing but an angry teenager who thought his best friend was lying to him. And, really, what proof did he have? The word of a football player that everyone held in such high esteem? It was immediately after graduation that he felt sick to his stomach. It had been his fault that Lyle lost all of her friends and decided to move to California for school.

“You okay?” Rian asked, elbowing his friend in the side.

Alex shook his head, snapping out of his pseudo-daydream, and turned to face his friend. “What?”

Rian smiled softly. “Are you okay?”

“Yeah,” he said quietly, his eyes falling on the back of Lyle’s head.

“She looks good, yeah?” Rian said, still looking at Alex through his peripheral vision.

Alex bit the inside of his cheek and looked back at his notebook. He hadn’t even written anything; he had simply been doodling around the edges of the page. “I don’t know what you’re talking about,” he mumbled.

Rian laughed.

“All right, Zack, you’re good to go,” Matt said over the mic. “You can come out and we’ll take a break.”

Zack walked out of the recording booth and high-fived Lyle.

“Great job, bro,” Lyle said, standing up to give him a quick hug.

“Take thirty, get a bite to eat, chill and catch up,” Matt said with a shrug. “I gotta call the old lady.”

“Young lady,” Lyle corrected. “Your wife is beautiful and young. You remind her of that. And tell her you love her.”

Matt nodded, muttering a yeah, yeah under his breath as he stood up and walked out of the room, cell phone in hand.

Lyle felt her stomach drop when she saw Matt leave the room. It was official: there was no buffer between Lyle and the people who had made the end of her senior year horrible. She could say that she had forgiven them as much as she wanted because, even though it was true, there was still a part of her that felt bitter and resentful. But she kept reminding herself that it was in the past, exactly where she wanted to keep it, but she wasn’t so sure of their intentions.

It was one of those awkward silences that everyone could feel and that no one was sure how to break without sounding like an idiot.

“How’s life been treating you, Lyle?” Zack asked, picking up a bottle of water and taking a long drink.

“Good,” she told him.

“Just good?”

Lyle nodded. “Just good.”

“Did anything interesting happen in the last four years?” Rian asked.

Lyle sat back down in her chair and turning so she could face all of them (and desperately trying to not make eye contact with Alex). “Not really. School, homework, papers, internship,” she said with a shrug.

“When did you graduate?”

“I haven’t yet; I will in May.”

“Do you even know what you’re doing?” Alex asked.

Jack cleared his throat. “Bad move, bro,” he whispered, covering it up with a cough.

Lyle met his eyes and, okay, she told herself not to get sucked in. After all, it was easy to see why so many teenage girls claimed to be in love with him. He had grown up since high school and, okay, he looked really good. But he still had the same arrogant attitude that made her slap him across the face in high school. And she told herself that she wasn’t going to do that again…unless she was provoked, of course. “Yes. I do know what I’m doing, Alex,” she said, her tone even.

Alex scoffed. “How long have you been an intern here?”

“Alex—“ Rian said, his tone a warning.

“Shut up, Rian, let her answer the question,” Alex said.

“Two days,” Lyle said, her tone mocking as she rolled her eyes.

“Alex—“

Alex frowned. “That’s not funny, Carlyle.”

“I’m not trying to be funny, Alex, but I don’t have to justify my credentials to you,” Lyle told him.

“Considering that this is my band, yes, you actually do.”

“Your band? I was under the impression that you aren’t the only member,” Lyle said, crossing her arms over her chest.

“You know what I mean,” Alex snapped.

Lyle’s eyebrows rose. “Do I?”

“How long have you been interning?” he asked again.

“Three months,” she told him. “And before you say I’m under-qualified, I will have you know that I’m the first intern in well over five years that they’ve hired while I’m still in school. The rest of the interns have graduated, some a few years ago. And I’ll also point out that I’m the only intern that is paid to work here and not the other way around. So, yes, I do know what I’m doing, and yes I’m qualified,” she explained.

“If you fuck up this album—“ Alex said, his voice low.

“Shut up, Alex,” Rian snapped, punching his shoulder.

Alex turned to face the drummer, rubbing his arm. “What the fuck was that for?!” he asked.

“Leave her alone,” Rian said.

“Thank you, Rian, but I can defend myself,” Lyle said evenly before standing up.

“Where are you going?” Alex asked.

Lyle paused and turned to look at him. She didn’t even have anything to say, she just laughed slightly and shook her head, before walking out of the room.

“You’re a fucking idiot, Alex,” Zack said, shaking his head.

“Shut the fuck up, Zack,” Alex snapped.

“Why don’t you make me,” Zack told him.

“Go check on Lyle, Erika,” Alex said.

Erika rolled her eyes. “I’m not your bitch.”

“Jack, tell your woman to go talk to Lyle,” Alex said evenly.

Jack looked between Erika and Alex. “I’d rather not take sides.”

Erika rolled her eyes. “I’ll go check on her, but not for you, Alex,” she said.

“I don’t care. Just do it,” Alex snapped.

+

Lyle heard the door of the bathroom open while she was washing her hands, and she knew it was Erika. “What do you want?” she asked before reaching for a small stack of paper towels to dry her hands.

Erika walked over and leaned against the sink. “I—“

“Are you going to imply that I’m not qualified, either? Because if so, I’m not in the mood,” she told her before tossing her paper towels in the trash.

“Alex is an asshole,” Erika said.

“Yeah.”

“That much hasn’t changed since high school.”

Lyle felt the corner of her lips twitch because, yeah, that was definitely the truth.

“I’m sorry…for him, you know?” Erika said.

Lyle shrugged. “Alex has had people apologizing for him for years. It’s gotta stop at some point, yeah?”

“Yeah,” Erika said with a laugh. “People tend to get sucked into the whole…Gaskarth-ness of it all,” she said with a shrug. “That hasn’t changed either.”

“That’s not surprising,” Lyle commented.

Erika nodded and paused, her eyes meeting Lyle’s in the mirror. “I’ve missed you, Lyle.”

Lyle looked away, her eyebrows rising then falling as a soft scoff fell from her lips.

“We all have.”

“That’s interesting, considering you guys are the reason I left Baltimore,” she said, trying to keep her tone light but she failed.

“Lyle, I’m sorry,” Erika said. “We were in high school and so stupid. I should have never let something like that get in the way of our friendship. I don’t care if you slept with him—“

“You sure cared a lot then, Erika,” Lyle said.

“Because you never told me—“

“Because I never slept with him,” Lyle snapped, “and you were too wrapped up in high school rumors and Alex telling you what to do what you didn’t fucking care.”

“But you said—“

“I never said I did, Erika,” Lyle said, turning to look at her. “I asked you what you thought. You assumed.”

Erika bit her lip. “I’m sorry I didn’t believe you.”

“It wasn’t even about that, Erika, it was about the fact that you never even gave me a chance,” Lyle said. “You walked into school on Monday and just…believed everyone else. You all did. None of you gave me a chance.”

“Lyle, it was years ago—“

Lyle scoffed. “I’m well aware of that, Erika,” she told her.

“Can we…move on?”

“I moved on when I came to California. I forgave all of you a long time ago,” Lyle said.

Erika smiled softly.

“But that doesn’t mean we’re friends.”

Erika frowned. “But…” she trailed off, shaking her head. “If you just talk to Alex and tell him what you told me—“

“No,” Lyle snapped. “I shouldn’t have to defend myself four years later. Let him believe whatever the hell he wants. I’m not here to rekindle some long lost friendship. I’m here to do my job. Because, let’s face it, once they’re done recording, I’ll never see any of you again. And I’m actually looking forward to that.”

Erika nodded slowly before giving up and walking out of the bathroom. Her vain attempt to apologize and get on Lyle’s good side had failed. As she walked back into the room, Jack immediately picked up on her mood change.

“Are you okay, babe?” Jack asked, wrapping his arm around her waist.

Erika shrugged. “She hates us,” she said quietly.

“But—“ Rian interrupted.

“She hates me, and she definitely hates Alex,” Erika said with a shrug. “The rest of you, I don’t know about. But she made it clear that she is not our friend.”

“No shit, Sherlock,” Alex snapped. “We haven’t been friends for years.”

“And we never will be again, thanks to you, Alex,” Erika said.

Alex scoffed. “How is this my fault?!”

Erika just stared at him for a minute. “You’re a fucking idiot, Gaskarth.”

Alex frowned. He wasn’t an idiot; he knew what Erika was implying. He just didn’t want to admit that she was right.