Leave Me Alone (I'm Lonely)

I was out of the house quicker than I had imaged. All I had packed with me was my essentials stuffed into my duffle bag. By the time that I had packed everything, Dave had stopped banging against the door and retreated somewhere alone. At that point, I was just thankful that he had disappeared.

My car was already packed with my essentials from my earlier attempts to leave, but never actually had the guts to actually go through with my plans. Now I had a record deal with a musician and a bank account that I was actually in control of, I was confident that I could actually survive. Knowing I would miss the room that I had spent a large portion of my life in, I had to shove it all behind me and lock it away.

The only place that I could think of going to was Charlie's, since I practically didn't have anywhere else to go. I considered going to Slash's, but that would have been extremely weird since his wife and I had never really formally met. That option was soon crossed out of my mind and I drove myself to Charlie's.

I buzzed Charlie's apartment number as I pulled up to the car park gates. A very tired voice spoke through the intercom, saying, "Hello?"

"Hey, Charlie," I said with a sigh. "It's me."

"Kassie? Is that you?"

"Who the fuck do you think it is?" I retorted, tired as anything.

"Well you didn't have to be so rude about it. Besides, it could've been pizza."

"Trust you to think of your stomach at this hour," I said. "Now just let me the fuck in."

There was a beeping noise as the gates opened to the car park.

"I have a park at the end. You can take it since I practically never use it.

I drifted into the car park without another word. The only other park was at the end of the car park, anyway, so it wasn't like it was hard to find. I shut off the car and grabbed something to change into along with my make-up case. It wasn't long before I made my way out of the car park, into the lift and at Charlie's open door.

I found Charlie leaning against the door with a bowl of cereal in his hands, eating it casually. He nodded at me as I approached the door. I took his spoon and eating the food upon it. That was actually starting to become a habit of mine. Eating other people's food, I mean. I had to learn how to control myself before it went out of control.

I moved into Charlie's apartment where he lived with his girlfriend, Annabelle. She was used to me floating around and appearing at random times, so it wasn't surprising when she greeted me with a hug and motioned towards an already set up couch bed.

I thanked her graciously and threw my things on there, stripping off my jacket. Charlie closed the door behind him with his foot and sat on the edge of the couch bed with crossed legs. Annabelle took the bowl of cereal from Charlie and walked to the kitchen.

"Hey!" Charlie exclaimed. "I was eating that!"

"That's enough food for you today, young man," Annabelle said, washing the bowl out. "Time for you to go to bed since Kassie is now here." Charlie tried to say something but Annabelle only interrupted him. "And no but's."

I smiled at their bickering as I got my things and went to the bathroom to get changed. As I shut the door, setting my mobile phone on the bench and stripping off my clothes until I was down to my underwear, I saw an unknown caller appear on my screen.

I picked up the phone and answered it, saying, "Hello, this is Kassie."

"Hey Kassie, it's Adam."

I was frozen, looking at my almost naked body in the mirror. I could visibly see all the goosebumps appearing all over my body and certain parts reacting I really wished they wouldn't. I looked away from the mirror and made a weird moaning noise.

"What was that?"

"I'm sorry," I stuttered. "I just stubbed my toe."

"Certainly didn't sound like it."

"How did you get my number?" I asked, trying to change the topic of conversation.

"I called around, and eventually I managed to get it."

"At this hour?" I said, shocked.

"It's surprising what a few phone calls can do, isn't it?"

"You have no idea," I said as I attempted to find my pyjama shorts and slipped them on, almost falling over. "What's up?"

"Nothing, really, in the little while I saw you."

"At least you have had a little more peace than I've had," I said as I managed to find my singlet top and slip it over my head without dropping my phone.

"What do you mean?"

"Better if I said it in person," I commented, spinning around and looking at myself in the mirror, making faces.

"Breakfast?"

"Be better than what I'll be eating in the morning," I commented as I began to remove all the make-up from my face.

"I heard that!" Annabelle said from the other side of the bathroom door. "And get off the phone, we have curfew's here."

"Stop listening in on my conversations!" I exclaimed as the lights turned off on the other side of the door.

"Who was that? Certainly didn't sound like Dave."

"That's what I wanted to talk to you about over breakfast tomorrow," I commented, studying myself in the mirror and happy with what I saw.

"I'll ask my questions then."

"Safely said."

"Talk soon?"

"You betcha," I said, hanging up the phone and moving from the bathroom.

________________________________________________________________________________________________________________

It was probably a good and a bad thing that I was seeing Adam everyday since I had first met him. Although there were always the tabloids wanting to always know what was going on between us, his presence helped me get through some of the hardest times, even though I'd like not to admit it.

I meeting him at a nice cafe by the beach and found a table by the water. I looked out at some surfers catching the waves that appeared to them. I let myself float away with the soft breeze and let my eyes float with the waves. I was so carried away I almost didn't notice Adam take a seat next to me.

I jumped out of my skin when I saw him there, gripping on to my seat. He laughed to himself and settled himself down. I calmed myself and said, "You scared the shit out of me. Seriously, don't do that again."

I fully took notice of Adam at this point, noticing that he had little to absolutely no make-up on at all. He was very natural and it was very rare that I had seen him like this, especially in his pictures. He was always done up when he was going out but I liked this look, although his make-up did make him look sexier.

"Hungry?" Adam asked as a waiter approached us, looking at us expectantly.

I nodded and looked up at the waiter, saying, "Can I just get scrambled eggs on toast with a few rashes of bacon, spinach and mushrooms?"

"A drink, madame?"

"Banana smoothie, thanks," I replied as the waiter turned to Adam.

"Can I get the same with a coffee, thanks," Adam said.

The waiter nodded and left our table. Adam turned to me, studying me as I did to him. The morning light caught his black hair and amazing eyes that always seemed to mesmerise me, no matter what.

Before I could control what came out of my mouth, I said, "You have very beautiful eyes."

The instant I realised I had said that, I clasped my hands to my mouth and blushed in shame. Adam laughed out loud and pried my hands from my mouth. We struggled against each other for a second before I dropped my hands and let him hold it. His fingers ran over mine before firmly taking hold of my small hands.

"And you have very rough hands," Adam said with a smile. "See, now we're even."

"But that was nothing compared to what I said," I whined.

"Nothing compared to what I took from you last night?" Adam said and his eyes widened instantly. "Let me rephrase. What virginity...no, that didn't sound right either. Ugh."

I smiled to myself and squeezed his hand. It felt right in his that I didn't let go and just let our hands hang between us. I watched Adam's face, seeing it blush underneath the soft light of the sun. It was a nice moment between us but it obviously had to be broken.

The waiter, who returned with our drinks, ruining it for us. He placed our two drinks on the table in front of us and in that moment, our hands disconnected. With out hands falling apart, I felt as if a part of me was being disconnected, a part of my heart sinking. I sighed as the waiter finally left us and distracted myself from Adam by taking a long sip of my drink. My brain froze up and I gripped it.

"Brain freeze," I gasped as it finally disappeared.

"That's what you get for drinking it too fast," Adam commented. "Now, what did you want to talk to me about?"

"More like, what information can you get out of me about last night," I said, rephrasing his question.

"What did you want to talk to me about?" Adam said.

"It's personal."

"So, you dragged me out here at eight o'clock in the morning to tell me it's personal?" Adam scoffed. "Sounds like a lousy plan to me."

"I left home," I said, glancing over at Adam. "The only person I could think of going to was my best friend, Charlie's." Adam's face fell. "He has a girlfriend so it's safe."

"What made you say the last part?" Adam questioned.

"You're expression," I said, studying him. "I can tell your beginning to feel something for me."

"A friendship, a fondness," Adam said. "Have you heard of it?"

"A liking, something more than the friendship that we agreed upon last night," I said, reaching out to Adam's hand and taking it firmly. "Do you remember?"

"How could I forget?" Adam said, his thumb stroking my hand. "But we're not here to dwell in the past. We're here to talk about something more important."

"Like the photograph that you posted of my daughter on the internet."