Leave Me Alone (I'm Lonely)

I took my time getting out of the car. Tommy knew of how much it made me nervous of meeting his parents, not sure how I should act because of the unloving relationship that I had with my father and the love that was cut off from my mother when I was fifteen or so. As we walked up the pathway to the middle-class house that he grew up in, he slid his arm around my waist and held me tight as we walked towards the aged but still beautiful woman standing at the door. I could see some of Tommy in her, the eyes and her smallness. I never payed out Tommy for how short he was, mainly because of how it made me look like less of a midget. Especially when we stood next to someone like Adam, we both looked puny next to him.

Tommy's mother extended her hands towards us, first embracing Tommy, saying, "Always nice to see you, Tommy, and on Easter weekend too."

"Oh, you know I don't believe in that stuff, mum," Tommy said as he pulled away from her, motioning for me to come forward.

"You could at least respect her views for it," I said as I moved to Tommy's side and she smiled at me.

"I like this girl," she said, pointing towards me while her eyes were still upon Tommy. "Who is she?"

"Kassandra McDonald," I said, extending my hand towards her. "His fiance."

Her hands went to her mouth, gasping. Tommy blushed, looking down at his feet as his mother squealed. She motioned for me to come to her and in doing so, she gave embraced me warmly. After a few moments, I tried moving away from her but she held on tight. I could see where Tommy got his hugging abilities from, making me chuckle. She pulled away from me and kissed me on both cheeks before studying my face. Her lips formed a wide smile as she took my hand and studied the ring upon my finger, her hand going to her heart as tears form at her eyes. She looked back to me with a proud expression upon her face.

"He fashioned it upon my own," she said as she dropped my hand and showed me her own ring that was plain and simple like my own.

"It just looks like a gold ring to me," I said, motioning towards my ring.

"What you don't see, if you don't study it enough, is the flecks of silver amongst the gold," she said, moving her own ring in the light and I caught a faint flicker of silver amongst the gold.

"I never noticed it before," I said as I looked to Tommy. "I guess Tommy has an eye for the finer things that I never really noticed before."

"A keen eye as well as ear my baby has," she said, kissing Tommy on his forehead.

I heard Tommy whine as we were ushered into the house that smelled of a strong perfume and wafting smell of meat floating through the hallways to the front door. I paused a moment, taking a deep breath of the smells that were around me. I had never really had this homely feel when I was growing up, or any of these smells either, so I was starting to feel myself relaxing as soon as I stepped through the front door. I let Tommy and his mother walk in front of me, leading me towards the smell that was completely intoxicating. We walked into the dining room where we found Tommy's father pouring himself a glass of red wine. Tommy's mother kissed her husband on the cheek as she motioned towards Tommy and I as we entered the room. His father greeted Tommy kindly and when his eyes rested on me, he almost knocked over the glass he was filling. Tommy's mother clicked her tongue as she took the bottle of wine off my future father-in-law and set it down.

"'Rolling Stone' and 'Vogue' girl," he said as I waved at him politely. "I thought you guys were just doing it for kicks."

"Tommy sent us a copy of the magazines," his mother explained as Tommy and I took a seat on the opposite side of the table. "You're not Kassandra McDonald to Anthony."

"Well, just to let you know, we are together and will be forever," I said, realising the way I worded it might not have been the best and blushed.

Tommy's mother, who I soon found out was 'Mary' with a little help from Tommy, noticed me blushing and said, "Nothing to be embarrassed about, honey. We already knew but just needed to hear it from you guys."

"I just thought it was for kicks," Anthony continued as we sat down at the table.

I saw Tommy reaching over the table to take a piece of lamb, Mary knocked his hand away and glared at him. He rolled his eyes and took my hand roughly. I cringed when he did so and tried to shift my hand out of his grasp but failed to do so. We connected hands around the table and said grace over the food. It was then that Tommy was able to take the piece of lamb that he had been eyeing without the threat of Mary's hand there to slap it away.

"Would you like a glass of wine, Miss?" Anthony said, picking up the bottle again.

"Kassie is fine," I said.

"Just as long as you call me dad," Anthony said, taking my glass from me.

"I think that will take some getting used to," I said as he gave me back my glass. "Besides, we all just met."

"That doesn't mean that you aren't part of our family," Mary said, offering me some lamb.

"That's not what you said to me when you found out I didn't believe in the things you believed in," Tommy said, taking a bite of his food.

"We didn't disown you, Tommy," Mary said with an expression that meant business. "You're still as much apart of this family as Kassie is."

"But I'm your biological son!" Tommy exclaimed as he dropped his cutlery to the table with a clatter. "I can understand that you are just saying that because you want to be nice to her since you all have just met but I have been apart of this family for near thirty years! The least you could do would be to accept me for me for who I am not just your only son that you like to ignore because you don't share the same values."

"Supporting Proposition 8, having relations with another of the same sex and involving yourself in those kinds of witchcraft is nothing something I would like my son to have values in!" Mary argued.

Seriously, this was intense. If I knew that Tommy's relationship with his parents was as bad as this, I would have really fought against coming. This was a really bad vibe to be around and I don't think that I would even like Mary to be my maid of honour. Imagine the kind of talking I would get before the wedding, what I would have to go through in the lead up. There bickering, though, didn't want to make me marry Tommy less or love him less. He was my fiance and going to be my husband making me want to support him even further in all the things that he did. They continued to fight as Anthony and I kept to our food, eating silently. I glanced to Anthony a few times, seeing him sigh. When he looked to me, he set down his cutlery and motioned for me to follow him.

We both got up from the table in sync, Tommy and Mary practically not noticing us leave. Anthony lead me out into the backyard where he switched on the porch lights and sat down on a porch swing with a sigh. I sat down beside him, studying his distant expression out into the darkening backyard. I could tell that he was intensely thinking about something that had a lot to do with what was going on inside. I looked from him to try an give him some privacy as he thought. I relaxed into the seat as it moved slightly as I moved.

"It all started with Tommy came back from that Catholic boarding school we sent him to," Anthony said, my attentions turning back to him. "He told me at first, not knowing what his mother would say."

"You were more open to what he believed in than Mary was?" I said and seeing Anthony nod.

"It was always like that," Anthony said with a sigh. "She kind of forced it on him, which made him rebel against and dislike it even more. I could understand it but I remained in my beliefs in our Lord and Saviour. Mary noticed soon enough, though, especially after Mary's brother, Joe, gave Tommy his first guitar."

"Tommy's never really told me much of his past," I said. "He's always demanding to know of mine so he can look after me properly, which is understandable, but I was always curious of his."

"He made a good move by bringing you here, then," Anthony said with a slightly smile and I could see where Tommy got a lot of his looks from, embedded in his father's features. "Even if you have to excuse the bickering at the table. That happens more often than not so it's not something you can't control."

"Mary seemed so nice when I first saw her," I said, thinking back to when Tommy and I first arrived.

"She was like that when I met her as well," Anthony said. "I grew to love her through all the years that we have been together but our love only bore us one son, which I was happy with anyway. If we had more children like Tommy, I don't think the fighting would ever end."

"If you ever need a break from Mary, there are plenty of rooms at my house on the other side of town where you can take refuge," I said. "And you will be near you son and grandchildren."

This caught Anthony's attention as he looked to me with a shocked expression, saying, "Grandchildren?"

"That was the one thing that they didn't print in either of the magazine's Tommy sent you," I said. "Although there has been some complications, Tommy and I are having children."

It wasn't the whole truth, but I was pregnant nonetheless. I didn't exactly want to tell Anthony that there was a possibility that the child couldn't be his but he could have already gathered that from the opening section on the 'Vogue' article. His expression was priceless and warmed my heart that he was excited about the possibility of me having children as Tommy was. At that moment, the door opened behind us and making Anthony and I looked to see Mary walk through it. He expression showed her shock and tears streaming down her cheeks.

"So the magazine was right?" Mary said as she stopped halfway between where Anthony and I sat an the door. "You're with child?"

"It is true," I said, confirming her suspicions.

"How could this happen?" she exclaimed and her proclamation hurt me right to the soul. "How could someone like my son impregnate another outside of marriage and especially to a woman whom I refuse to give my consent to marry! Someone like you doesn't deserve to have a child, especially with someone like the bastard of a child my son has become. You both are a disgrace to my family!"

"You are a disgrace to this family!" I said, standing from the seat to face her. "How dare you go around thinking that you know everything, pushing your beliefs onto someone that clearly doesn't want it? Tommy can make that decision for himself, Mary Ratliff, and if you don't like it, I guess it's just another problem that you have to deal with."

"How dare you speak to me like that, Kassandra McDonald," Mary spat, looking me up and down. "That is one of the most disrespectful things that I have heard to me in along time, apart from Tommy's 'loving'. Speaking of love, loving Tommy is a challenge enough, isn't it? I seriously don't know how you could do it."

"Loving you is a challenge," Anthony said from behind me and getting up from the swing to join me. "I don't know how I did it for all these years."

"That's because we are a good match, Anthony," Mary retorted, trying to regain a loosing battle. "Same views and values. We love each other, too, which is a plus."

"The thing is, Mary," Anthony said, placing a hand upon my shoulder. "Tommy and Kassandra's visit today has really shown me what true love is. I came out here to think of what our relationship has become and since we got married all those years ago, as well has having Tommy, I think our love has become more of a ritual than anything else. Our love is lost all its lustre and kindness."

"You don't know what you're talking about," Mary said, cocking her head harshly to the side. "I still love you."

"But it's not real love," Anthony said, glancing towards me. "Kassandra's love for our son is more love and devotion than you have ever given me. They are the perfect couple, the epitome of what we could've and should've experienced but never did. That is why I am leaving you, Mary. Consider this as the last day you and I are husband and wife."