Holly, Would You Turn Me

I followed her opening her door to see her sat on her bed.

“What have I done?” I asked and she shook her head.

“Holly don’t ignore me, what did I do?” I asked and she got up again trying to walk past me but I stopped her.

Her make up was starting to run leaving black lines down her cheek and she pushed me but I stayed put.

“Holly,” I said but she pushed me again.

“Alex just move,” she said quietly but I stayed still so she smacked my chest.

“Tell me what I did and I’ll move,” I said desperate to know what I’d done to her.

“You want to know what you did?” she shouted at me and I looked at her.

“I’ll tell you Alexander you made my life difficult! Life is hard enough without having to tell lies and live 2 lives constantly, we live in some fantasy world where this is perfect but its not Alex and it never has been and I know it never will be! I did this for you Alex because I knew how much it meant to you but I never once thought I’d end up in this situation,” she shouted and I looked at her shocked.

“What do you mean?” I asked.

“This situation Alex where we both end up heartbroken and it seems to me that we’re breaking each others hearts,” she snapped.

“No we’re not, your over reacting again!” I shouted at her and she shook her head.

“No I’m not you broke up with Jack, the guy you love just because of what he did to me and Zack and I just broke up because I won’t make you date Jack again. For 2 people who are ‘in love’ we seem to be breaking hearts everywhere we go, she snapped and I shook my head.

“Your not breaking my heart, Jack hit you Holly and that was never going to be acceptable from him or anyone else as for Zack that’s your decision if you tried to force me into it I wouldn’t do it. Tell him you tried but I won’t listen if it makes him be with you,” I offered and she shook her head.

It’s not that easy Alex, I’d never sell you out like that to anyone and you know it, I just can’t believe we ended up here. This is a punishment for the lies you know,” she said and I rolled my eyes.

“We’re not being punished for anything, we don’t need them Holz and you know it. We had fun before them and we’ll have fun again so stop crying because to be frank you look a mess with eyeliner running down your face, I said and she smiled.

“It’s a good job your gay really because with lines like that you’d never get a girl, she teased and I nodded.

We sat eating ice cream for the rest of the night before heading off to bed, I woke up the next morning and heard her talking away and I knew she was talking to herself.

She was a pretty girl but whoa was her mind strange, she had her routines and for everything that was unpredictable about her otherwise these weren’t.

She had to do her routine every morning and night and if she did it wrong she would start over, she was obsessive to the point of madness sometimes and it irritated the heck out of me when we were late to go somewhere and she’d be stuck in her own mind but I knew she couldn’t help it.

She told me once it was like she was trapped in her own mind, that even if she tried she couldn’t break it and I never believed her but then that’s easy to say when it’s not your issue.

She’d been like it since she was a teenager, but her mind worked in weird ways like most women’s did in my opinion.

On the outside she was perfectly normal on the inside she was a mess but a quirky mess, not the sort that needed help,no Holly was just a girl with a head full of chaos.

Her mind could be in 5 different places at once; she’d say random things that popped into her head because ‘She’d thought about it so she had to say it’.

She hid it all pretty well and as far as I was aware Zack had never been aware of how extreme she could be, especially when under pressure.

“Come out fighting, show me what we’re worth, I heard her say & smiled at the fact she was writing, Holly had always been good at English.

Give her a book, poem, sonnet etc and she could tell you it’s meaning, the message the writer was trying to convey & at the age of 17 she wrote a poem and it was great, her mind bottled things and writing let her get it all out and she kept it up.

I wanted to be in a band and she wanted to write, so we helped each other get where we wanted to be.

When people saw what she could do they wanted more from her until she made a deal with our record label to be available to write for their bands and every song she wrote they got to listen to before any others.

I wandered downstairs to see she’d made me toast already and I grabbed it as she appeared at the bottom of the stairs.

“Ready, she stated, as there was a knock at the door. I followed her out and we got in the car and left for the interview, we stayed in silence until she groaned.

“What?” I asked.

“Weather, she stated pointing at the window and I saw the black clouds and the rain on the glass.

“Bet not wearing a coat seems stupid now,” I teased and she nodded.

“That whole outfit is stupid,” she snapped and I smiled as I saw that her tanned legs were shivering, she was right.

Outside it was raining and it looked freezing and her outfit of denim cut off shorts, baggy tank and chunk scarf (which I recognized to be the one my gran knitted her last Christmas) wasn’t ideal.

I laughed as she pulled her odd tube socks up so they were peaking out the top of her boots, I placed my hand on her leg and felt how cold she was and I took my jacket and hoodie off giving her my hoodie before pulling my jacket back on.

She pulled my hoodie on as we pulled up at the hotel.

We got out and I pulled her into my body to keep her warm, I heard someone shout my name and saw a group of people smiling at me and I walked over, I had pictures with them and the rain was icy cold on my skin and I looked over at Holly who was stood waiting for me exposed to the cold weather.

I could have stood there all day talking to these people and she’d never complain and be grumpy with me for making her wait in the cold weather.

“I best go guys nice to meet you, I said and I walked back to her.

We got inside and were dragged off to a room where the heating was on full blast that was a pleasant feeling after the rain.

“Sorry about last night, I offered and she smiled.

"Forgiven, sorry I was grumpy,” she stated and I smiled hugging her.

“More than forgiven, just forget what they’re saying and forget them. Holz we never needed them,” I stated kissing the top of her head and she nodded.