You Just Do

I'm a coward, a horrible fucking coward. I’m a fucking awful person. Those were my thoughts in the elevator after my physical therapy, just before the worst possible thing happened. Olivier had one of his asthma attacks and passed out. Max who was still steaming after he thought his brother sexually attacked me, fell to his knees and tried to shake Olivier conscience. I just stood on a crutch and watch the horrible scene unfold. I felt helpless and I was.

Everything else was a blur. I don’t remember how we ended up in a hospital or how Olivier woke up. The next thing I remember was being left in a small hospital room with Olivier glaring at me like I was a murderer. And I almost was. I tried giving him a sympathetic look, but he just kept glaring. While Max was out of the room I even tried grabbing his hand, but he snatched it away. I felt my heart break. This hurt more than not being on the ice.

“Olivier?” I spoke quietly. He slightly turned to face me. “I sorry. I should said something to Max. Please just talk to me.” Olivier’s gaze soften a little bit and I went to grab his hand. Again he tried to snatch it away but I held fast and brought it to my thoroughly chewed lips down to kiss it. I then brought my lips up to meet his in an unexpected kiss. At first he didn’t kiss back, but the urgency of my kiss jump started his lips to slowly move against mine in a loving embrace. I broke apart to state how sorry I really was. “When I saw that hurt in your eyes, it hurt so much. You are just so cute and sweet and a boy, that I don’t know what to do. Growing up in Russia,” I pause trying my best to speak in perfect English so he can understand what I am feeling. “There wasn’t any gays. No one talked about how a man could feel what I feel right now for another man. The same thing for women. I was taught growing up to look for a wife to have children with and start a perfect family,” I pause and laugh, smiling up at the beautiful boy. “Oh how wrong I was. When I found you that whole idea was wiped clean”

For the first time since he has awoken, he smiled towards me. “Just because you are adorable doesn’t mean I’m still not mad.”

I slightly frowned, “I understand. You can be mad. You really do. But I will make it up to you, I swear. You know what? I take you out on a proper date and we can get to know each other. How about dinner tonight?

Olivier breaks out into a genuine smile which causes me to grin like a love struck teen. But then his smile quickly fades. “What’s wrong?” I asked, my hopes of us making up falling.

“What do I say to Max? ‘e is still mad. ‘e won’t let me out of the house. ‘ow will we be together?” Olivier asked like a lost child trying to find his way.

I thought about for a moment before I got a brilliant idea. “I have an idea.”

*******

“You are a genius, Evgeni!” Olivier exclaimed, throwing his arms around my neck and bringing me down in a kiss. I have never been kissed so much in my life. Not breaking the kiss, I gently lead him over to the dining room table with platters of food atop. I pulled out his chair, like a gentleman, and then sat in my own chair.

It was my idea to bring dinner to Olivier since Max would know if he went out of the house by the tracking on his cell phone. I learned how to cook from my mother, so I really hoped he liked Russian food.

He didn’t like it, he loved it. We quickly finished dinner and it was followed by cuddling up on the couch watching the hockey game. I was absentmindedly playing with his hair and he would giggle every time I twirled it a certain way. I was happily content and so was he. It was perfect after all of the drama of the day. This boy is certainly special.