Spinning Insanity

Im always afraid that I'm the friend everyone secretly hates.

I dont know what happens but I suddenly just am starting to slip away.

They tell me they love me.

I can only be sure that Holly and maybe AJ actually mean it.

The others I always lose topics to talk about.

The boy.
Oh god that boy.

His names Kyle.
We could talk for hours about music.

It was hard to keep a conversation if it wasn't about music.

But that's getting easier after he and his friend Mike asked me to sit with them at lunch.

I like him.

He probably doesn't like me.

But I can't always be sure. Sometimes there's things he says.

One time we entered a contest together.
I asked him what he would do if we won.

He said he would kiss me.

Thats the first time anybody has ever even just said they wanted to kiss me.
The first time anyone admitted they could possibly act as more than a friend.

The fact that he could see himself so easily kissing me makes my stomach fly.

I've never had a boyfriend if you couldn't tell.

He wants to also be in a band and live in London.

I might ask him to come with me when we turn 18.