Listen to the Thunder

It’s the end of May now. I can’t believe there are only two weeks left until exams start, and then only a week of them until the end of the year. My first year of college, almost finished! What a fucking rollercoaster it’s been though, so many ups and downs that I’m surprised I didn’t go mad and break down. But everything’s worked out for the best, right? I still haven’t made a decision about what to do with Kyle like Matt had told me too, but I’m a little pre-occupied with college right now, okay? I’ll make my decision. At some point.

“Surely we could take a little study break?” Alex purred, nuzzling my neck with his lips.

“Lex, a little study break to you means a three-hour fucking session,” I retorted, rolling my eyes.

“No, three-hours of making love,” Alex corrected, beaming.

“The answer is still no,” I muttered.

I really do have to get this revision memorised, or I’m going to fail.

“What if I take my time with a really good blowjob?” Alex offered.

Blood rushed south at that, but I ignored him. If I ignore him, he’ll stop and we can actually get some work done. Alex seemed to have other plans though, because he noticed the start of a bulge in my crotch and got off the sofa, kneeling between my legs.

“Lex, no! Matt could come back any minute now!” I whined.

Alex just smirked and palmed me through my jeans for a few seconds, waiting until my head tilted backwards to unzip my jeans and pull my dick out. Fuck it. A blowjob can be quick, right? Alex grinned when I put my book to one side, laughing as I threaded my fingers through his hair and guided his face towards my dick.

“You wanted to do this, so fucking do it,” I grumbled.

“You won’t be pissed at me when you come so hard that Evan Kirkendork can hear your screams at the end of the hall,” Alex mused.

Kirkendall but whatever. I tugged his hair a little to encourage him a little more, so Alex quickly took me into his mouth. Fuck, he took the whole of me, I can feel that I’m brushing against the back of his throat. Fuck, he hasn’t deep-throated in a while. I couldn’t help but moan as Alex started bobbing his head, one forearm holding down my hips while his other hand dug into my thigh. He really does give good head.

Then my phone started ringing. Huh. Out of curiosity, I looked at the caller ID. Pat. I cancelled the call. I’ll ring him back later, he’ll understand. Alex pulled off my dick, making me whimper (what? I was enjoying that) and lifted his head to look at me.

“Who was it?” he asked, his hand wrapping round my base and jerking me off slowly.

“Just Pat. I’ll ring him back later,” I moaned.

“He probably just wanted to tell you about something new he and Zack decided to do in bed,” Alex chuckled.

Before I could even reply, Alex had taken me back into his mouth and started bobbing his head once more. Fuck, this feels good. And of course, my phone started ringing again. Pat. Huh.

“It’s Pat again. He wouldn’t be calling straight away again if it wasn’t important,” I frowned.

“Can’t it wait?” Alex grumbled as he pulled off me.

“I don’t think so,” I sighed.

I ignored Alex’s pout as I flipped open my phone.

Jack: Someone’s eager to talk to me.
Pat: Jack! Jack, I’m so sorry if I interrupted something, but I didn’t know what to do, I didn’t know who else to call, I…”
Jack: Woah, calm down, what’s wrong?

Seriously, what’s got him so panicked?

Pat: It’s Kyle.

My blood ran cold. K-Kyle? What’s wrong with Kyle?

Jack: What do you mean it’s Kyle?
Pat: He just texted me saying that he doesn’t have a reason to live anymore.

Oh my God. Oh my fucking God.

Jack: A-Are you serious?
Pat: Yeah, I really fucking am. I tried texting back but he didn’t answer. I tried calling back but he won’t pick up his phone. His dormmate is in a lecture at the moment so he can’t do anything but try to text him too. You’ve got to help, Jack.
Jack: Of course. Of course, I’ll go and find him right now.
Pat: Thank you Jack. Fuck, I don’t know what I’d do if he does something stupid. Please help him.
Jack: I’ll help him, you have my word. I’ll call you back when I know anything.

With that, I snapped my phone shut. Alex frowned at me as I pushed him away and stuffed my deflating dick back into my boxers and stood up.

“What’s going on?” Alex asked, confused.

“Kyle just texted Pat that he doesn’t have a reason to live anymore. I think he’s going to try to kill himself,” I whimpered.

“Fucking hell,” Alex winced.

“I’ve got to go,” I told him, hoping he wouldn’t go mad.

Mad? No, Alex just looked incredibly sad. But I can’t deal with that right now. I have Kyle’s life to worry about.

“Yeah, go. Let me know when you know anything,” Alex nodded quietly.

I pressed a chaste kiss to his lips before grabbing my phone and running out the room. Four door down. Kyle’s dorm. It’s locked. Fuck.

“Hey, you! Yeah, you with the muscles!” I called out, beckoning a random guy over.

I think his name is Jeff Maker. I’m not entirely sure. Either way, he came over, beard, muscles and all.

“There’s something wrong with Kyle but he’s not answering his door. I need you to break it down,” I told him bluntly.

He looked me up and down, obviously checking to see if I was high, before shrugging.

“Sure, but I’m not being held responsible for this,” Jeff nodded.

“I’ll take all the blame,” I promised.

I winced as Jeff squared his shoulders and rammed his body into the door. The lock broke easily. Huh. Cheap manufacture.

“Anything else you need?” Jeff asked.

That didn’t even hurt him? Fuck.

“No, I’m all good. Thank you so much,” I smiled.

“No sweat. I hope Kyle’s okay,” Jeff nodded.

Then he walked away. I quickly entered the room and closed the broken door as best as I could before running over to Kyle’s room.

“KYLE! KYLE, OPEN YOUR FUCKING DOOR!” I yelled, banging harshly.

“No,” replied a quiet voice.

Oh thank fuck, he’s not dead.

“Kyle, Pat rang me and told me what you texted him. About you not having a reason to live anymore. You’re wrong! You have so many reasons to live!” I whimpered.

“No, I don’t,”

“Yes you do! You have your loving parents! You have your adorable little sister! You have a great college course! You have all your friends! You have…me!” I exasperated.

“I don’t have you,” Kyle choked.

Fuck, so this is about me.

“Kyle, please open the door. We can talk about this. You don’t have to hurt yourself,” I begged.

“I’m not going to hurt myself…”

Oh thank fuck.

“…I’m going to kill myself,”

Oh shit! Without thinking, I ran out to the corridor again, looking desperately for Jeff again. Oh thank fuck, he’s still in the corridor, talking to someone.

“JEFF!” I yelled.

Jeff looked over at me, frowning when I desperately beckoned him over, but walked over anyway.

“Yeah?” he asked.

“I need you to break down his bedroom door too,” I whimpered.

“I wouldn’t normally do this, because it’s a little fucking weird, but you look desperate, so sure,” Jeff nodded.

Thank the Lord for Jeff Maker and his unquestioning strength. I led Jeff into the dorm and pointed to Kyle’s door. Jeff rolled his shoulders back and walked over to the door.

“Move away from the door,” he announced.

“W-What?”

Jeff rammed his body into the door, breaking the lock easily. Again, cheap manufacture.

“I’ll leave you to it,” Jeff told me, patting me on the shoulder.

Strange giant of a college student. I waited until Jeff had left the dorm to rush into Kyle’s room, whimpering when I saw Kyle huddled and shaking in the corner. What’s he holding? Is that…holy fuck, where did he get a gun?! Kyle shrieked as I grabbed it out of his hands, but I threw it on the bed away from him. Fuck. Fucking hell.

“Where the fuck did you get a fucking gun?!” I exasperated, walking back over to him.

“My dad gave it to me ages ago. For emergency protection. Emergency protection. I think he’d shit himself if I knew I’m going to use it to kill myself,” Kyle whimpered.

“You’re not going to kill yourself. I got you out of a dangerous situation with Nick for you to live happily and safely, not for you to kill yourself!” I told him.

“But I’m not happy. I’m not even fucking close to being happy. Not without you,” Kyle said sadly.

“You can’t do this. You can’t fucking do this to me,” I choked, sitting down next to him and taking him into my arms.

“I love you so much, Jack. I’m so sorry,” Kyle sobbed, clutching at my t-shirt.

“I’m sorry too,” I whispered, tears filling my eyes.

I paused, chewing my bottom lip. Should I…? Fuck it.

“I love you too,” I added.

Kyle whimpered and buried his face further into my neck, his tears starting to soak through my t-shirt as he shook in my arms.

“Promise me, Kyle. Promise me you won’t kill yourself,” I said firmly, the tears in my eyes on the brink of falling.

Kyle nodded. But that’s not enough.

“I need to hear you say it, Kyle,” I said.

No answer.

“Kyle, baby, please. I need you to say it,” I pleaded.

“I promise I won’t kill myself,” Kyle whispered.

And that’s when the tears fell down my cheeks.

“Thank you. Thank you. Fuck Kyle, don’t scare me like that again,” I groaned, pressing a kiss to the side of his head.

“I’m sorry Jacky. I just didn’t know what else to do,” Kyle said quietly.

“You come to me. That’s what you do. You come to me and we work this out together,” I said firmly.

“Do you really mean that?” Kyle murmured, looking up at me with his beautiful, albeit watery, blue eyes.

“With all my heart,” I nodded.

It was then that I realised I meant what I said. My…my decision was made. But how am I going to tell Alex? Fuck, Alex. What is he going to think of me after this?

“Can you stay for a while?” Kyle asked nervously.

“Of course,” I nodded, no hesitations, “I’ll need to call Pat though,”

Telling Alex can wait until later. Right now, my priority is Kyle like it always has been.