Killing Loneliness

My eyes were locked on myself in the mirror. Looking back at me was a girl in a beauitful long dress. I looked at the lady who had helped me get dressed.
“You look beautiful miss, really. This dress is perfect for you,”
The dress fit me perfectly, showing each curve that I had. It was an antique ivory colour that had lace all over it. In my mind, I never thought that I'd like something so simple and elegant, but it was really perfect. The train of the dress slinked around my ankles perfectly and as I walked in the room slowly, just to see what it looked like, it moved perfectly with me. This was it. It really was.
I nodded to the girl, letting her know that it was time to go show my mom and Kat. I smield as I walked threw the door. Bam had paid for Kat, my Mom and I all to come to New York for the weekend. He said that I could get my dress at the best wedding dress place in New York and then enjoy some girl time with them, all on him.
Every person that I walked past stopped and looked at me with wide eyes. They each said something but my mind was a blurr. I just nodded and smiled, thanking them along the way. When Kat and my Mom finally came into view my heart started to race. This was it.
I stood up on the plat form and turned to look at them. My mom had tears in her eyes and they were streaming down her cheeks to now. Kat was holding her hand tightly and had the other over her mouth.
“Oh Ashleigh,” My mom's voice croaked threw a tiny sob. The assistant walked up and clipped in a veil into my hair. She pulled in infront of my face. I could feel tears starting to break ground in my own eyes.
“What do you guys think?” I took a kleenex from the table close to me and dabbed at my makeup lightly. They nodded before Kat gently let go of my mom's hand and came closer to me.
“Hun, You look amazing. This has to be it, all the other dresses equal nothing compared to this one,” She took the kleenex from my hand and dabbed away her own tears. I smiled and looked at myself in the mirror one last time before I turned to the sales associate.
“I'll take it,”

---Night before the wedding---

I took a long sip of my campagne. My mom, Kat and I sat in a gorgeous hotel room, curtosy of my wonderful soon to be husband. We were all sitting in thick comfy bathrobs after the spa people left. The massage that I got was the best that I had ever had.
I bit my lip nervously, looking at the tv. We had put on a movie and agreed to keep it simple. They were both looking at the screen intently, while I couldn't take my eyes off of my engagement ring. The rings that we had picked out were beauitful, and the ring I was going to wear was going to match and join in with my engagement ring. In the morning I was going to ahve to give the pastor my ring.
I twisted it around my finger, taking another sip of my champagne. Kat's hand caught mine and I looked up at her. She had a soft look on her face. A second later, my mom was lokoing over to.
“Are you ok?” Kat scooted closer, waiting for my answer.
“Of course I am. I'm marrying the man of my dreams tomorrow!” I laughed nervously and took another sip of my glass.
Kat raised her eye brow and looked back and forth between my mom and I.
“It's ok to be nervous Ashleigh, I was when I got married to your father,” My mom came and sat next to me and patted my leg. I nodded slowly.
“I know, it's natural to be nervous. I'm just more upset that I don't get to be with him tonight,” I frowned a lightly and then looked at them. They both seemed to think that it was hillarious and laughed loudly.
“You to are perfect for eachother Ash,” Kat took a sip of her water before she contiuned to speak. “I know a while ago I wasn't very fair to you and Bam. I wanted to be with him and thought I was in love with him. But now when I look at it, I thought what was our friendhsip love was more. He's such an amazing guy, but he doesn't realize what he's stummbled upon with you,” Kat smiled warmly and then wrapped her arms around me to hug me tightly. I hugged her back and wiped the few tears that were falling down my cheek .
“Kat, I don't know what I'd do without you here. You helped me so much with the Lawrence stuff – and then with loosing the baby, and then with getting back with Bam. I know it was hard on you too, not liking him at times and liking him at others, but I can't believe how much you've done for me,” I picked up a kleenex now , knowing the back of my hand couldn't wipe up all the tears.
“Oh hunny, you're my best friend! Of corse I'm going to do everything I can for you!” Kat had tears running down her own cheeks now. We hugged eachother tightly and stayed like that for a moment before I pulled away and looked at my mom. She had tears running down her cheeks too, which seemed to be something that was constant in the last month.
“You two girls are so sweet together,” She took a kleenex and dabbed her cheeks.
“Ashleigh, I'm so happy for you. Bam is the nicest man that I could have ever hoped that youd find. He's so amazing,” I smiled and nodded. Bam really was amazing.
“Thanks mom,” My mind started to turn a little more now. He was my bestfriend, he was my lover, he was my soon to be husband. There was nothing I could have wanted more then for tomorrow to come faster. So that I could finally call myself Mrs. Bam Margera.