Hold on Tight and Don't Look Back

The sun was shining through my bedroom window as I began to get ready for the first day of the rest of my teenage life. In just an hour the four guys that compose my favorite band will be at my doorstep waiting to pick me up so I can join them on tour. I could hear the timer on my hair straightener buzzing, signifying it was time to fry my hair just a little bit more. I mean, at this point, what difference is it going to make, anyways? I honestly think my hair prevails through more damage than anyone I know. I can’t even remember the last time my hair was its natural color. Pretty bad, I know. Oh well, it’s not like I care. Luckily, it never takes me long to get ready, I can have my hair straight, teased slightly, and ready to go in all of about 15 minutes. Thank, God; I’m not one to get out of bed easily.

I wish I was better at picking out what to wear, it would make mornings so much easier. But no, I have to stand here and stare at my closet for what seems like forever just to decide what to put on for the day. It shouldn’t even matter today, my whole closet is going to be packed up and coming on the road with me; I’m going to end up wearing everything at some point. The little black dress with the front zipper caught my attention from the corner of my eye. You probably wouldn’t know it, but I actually enjoy the whole idea of fashion. Constructing an outfit is like art to me, and there’s no greater feeling than going out on the town knowing you look hot. I decided I was going to go out on a limb and wear the dress. I grabbed some black leggings from the closet, and my favorite black high cut boots.

I could hear the gates leading to my driveway opening. My mom keeps forgetting to call a maintenance person to have the awful squeaking fixed. It’s kind of nice in a way, though, I can always tell when someone is coming. I could see Jenna’s shiny black Escalade coming up the drive. This was it, the moment of truth. The guys had no idea I lived in a huge house on a private drive, with a giant closet that they volunteered to help pack. I feel bad for not telling them all this, but, honestly, I’m not one to brag. It’s nice to have what I have, but it doesn’t define who I am, so why should I go around telling everyone?

The doorbell rang. This was it; there was no turning back now. I could hear my mom opening the door and Jenna introducing her to the guys. It’s kind of weird that she said I could go with them and she hadn’t met them before this moment, but then again, she plans her whole life around what Jenna tells her, so I guess this isn’t any different. I began to descend down the “grand staircase” that takes up most of the entry way. No, it’s nothing like the staircase in Titanic, I simply call it that because it’s huge, made of granite, and gorgeous. I saw a smile flash across Mikey’s face, he was the first one to notice my entrance, and it was obvious he was happy. I stood at the bottom of the staircase staring at the four men who held the key to my future. For the next few months I would have to rely on them alone for my safety and well being. Thank God I trust them, even though I hardly know them.

“Hey, you know, you look really pretty today,” Mikey leaned over and whispered in my ear.

“I need some advice on what to do about these curtains in the kitchen,” my mom said to Jenna.

It was obvious she was only trying to avoid the awkward tension in the room. Jenna and my mother walked away laughing, at least I don’t have to deal with their comments; I’m surprised they hadn’t asked about the dress.

“You know, you could have told us you live in a mansion,” Frank was freaking out.

“Yeah, a forewarning about the private gates would have been nice,” Gerard laughed.

“Sorry, Jenna knows the codes, and I don’t really like to brag. It’s not my style,” I smiled.

“It’d be my style,” Ray said. “I’d let everyone know I had money and I’d be proud of it.”
There was a moment of silence, and the guys began to burst out laughing.

“That was a horrible joke, Ray,” Mikey smiled. “Better luck next time, bud.”

“Come on, let’s go upstairs and start packing. We’ve got a lot to do if you ever want to get out of here” I said as I began to make my way up the stairs.

“Who says we want to leave? We’re moving in!” Frank laughed.

“You probably could, honestly. We have way too much extra room in here,” I laughed. I was being totally honest, I mean, it’s kind of lonely in this big house with just me and my mom, not to mention she’s at work most of the time. The walk up the staircase was slightly awkward because the guys were trying to take in every aspect of the house. I led them through the double doors to my bedroom; it was honestly more like a master suite in my opinion. Ray stood in the open doorway sporting the classic “deer in headlights” look. He was clearly taken aback by the size of my room.

“Where’s your closet?” Mikey looked at me smiling.

I walked over to the rolling door that would unveil my gigantic closet. I was a little nervous about letting them help me pack, there’s a lot of sentimental things in this closet that I get really weird about people touching.

“It’s like your own clothing store,” Frank said.

“Yeah, most of the time I forget what’s in here,” I laughed.

We started taking things off the hangers and placing them into the suitcases and boxes that would be accompanying me on my journey. It was getting to the point where you could see the items that are usually hidden away on the shelves underneath the clothes. Gerard grabbed my favorite floppy teddy bear that was gift from my dad when I was three. It was one the last things I had gotten from him, and I hated when people touched it. I lunged across the room in an effort to save what was left of my memories, tackled Gerard to the ground, and pulled the bear away from him. I started to cry, and I started to hit Gerard. I don’t know what came over me, I usually don’t let myself get this worked up about my dad. Mikey came over and pulled me off of his brother.

“Hey, hey, settle down, he didn’t mean to hurt the bear,” Mikey said, hugging me.

“Gerard, I’m so sorry, I didn’t meant to,” I said, crying. “It’s just, that’s the last thing I got from my dad, and it means a lot to me.”

“It’s okay, don’t worry about it,” he smiled. “I didn’t mean to upset you, It won’t happen again.”

“No, no, it’s not your fault. Here, you can look at it if you want,” I handed him the bear.

“It has your name on it,” He smiled again

“Yeah, my dad had a strange knack for hand stitching, he did it himself,” I smiled back.

“That’s really neat. Are you going to bring it with you?”

“I am, it goes everywhere with me,” I took the bear from Gerard and placed it safely in a box.

“I think we got all of the clothes,” Ray said as he walked over from the corner of the closet.

“Yeah, we did,” I said, “which is great, because I saved the best for last.” I was smiling. I had been waiting all morning to show them this. I opened the hidden door in my closet that led straight into my music room. I spent most of my time in here, playing my instruments made me feel at peace with the world. My music room is home to my two acoustic guitars, two electric guitars, a few amps, my violin, viola, and my electric bass.

“Why do you have so many of these bad boys?” Gerard laughed.

“I just love music. Each of these instruments is special to me. I could never let them go,” I looked down at the ground, trying to hide the fact that my face was red from embarrassment.

“I didn’t know you played the bass!” Mikey exclaimed.

“I don’t,” I said shyly. “I’m just learning.”

“I can teach you! I can teach you!” Mikey was surprisingly happy about discovering my new interest in the bass.

“That’d be so awesome, I’d really appreciate it,” I smiled.

“It’s a deal, then,” he said, motioning his hand for a high five.

“The problem is, I don’t know which ones to pack,” I admitted.

“Oh, that’s easy,” Frank laughed. “One acoustic, one electric, the violin, the viola, and leave the rest behind, we’ve got you covered.”

I picked up my Greg Bennet acoustic from it’s resting place and put it in it’s hard travel case.

“Lexi, why are you bringing that one when there’s a Gibson sitting right next to it?” Gerard asked, confused.

“It’s the first guitar I learned how to play, it was a birthday gift from my grandmother,” I replied.

“Gosh, Gerard, way to be an ass,” Mikey said.

“Sorry..” Gerard seemed a little freaked out by all this.

I packed up the rest of my instruments and their accessories. We were finally getting somewhere in the quest of gathering my belongings. Luckily, I packed most of my personal things last night. Otherwise, we would have been packing for hours on end. The guys and I gathered up the suitcases, boxes, and instruments and carried it all downstairs so we could put everything in the car.

“I left something in the car, let me go grab it, it’ll only take a second,” I said. I can’t believe I almost left without the most important thing, my iPod. I don’t know how I could spend days on end traveling on a bus without it. I honestly think I’d die. I’d die without coffee, too, but I think Gerard and Mikey have that one under control.

“I’ll go with you,” Mikey smiled. I could tell he was eager to get away for a few minutes.

“What’d you forget?” He asked.

“My iPod, the one thing I could not leave here without,” I laughed.

“Oh, gosh. I’d die if I didn’t have mine,” he raised his voice high to sound like a sad child. I’m not sure whether I think it was cute or creepy, but either way, he’s still adorable. We made our way through the kitchen to the garage. My garage is one of those weird garages, where all of them are connected, but you have to go through the doors to get to them, it’s totally strange. I grabbed Mikey’s hand and led him through the first two car garage, and then the second. I opened the hidden door in the second garage and walked through.

“Where are we going?” Mikey asked; he still want used to the size of this place.

“Just here,” I smiled. I walked over to the shiny, black, Dodge Ram Diesel truck that made it’s home in our last garage. I opened the door, and climbed in. Mikey walked around the front of the truck and took a seat on the passenger side.

“Alright, first a Camaro and now this?” He asked, he was clearly a little surprised.

“Yeah,” I smiled. “This is my real baby. I only use the Camaro for driving to school or downtown.” I had never said that out loud before, and I definitely never realized how much of a spoiled brat it made me sound like. Oh well, he’s already seen the house.

“This is so cool. You didn’t strike me as the type of girl that would drive a big truck, but I like it,” he said as he placed his hand on mine. I looked up and began to gaze into his hazel eyes. I never realized how beautiful they were until now. He leaned in closer to me, and kissed me on the cheek.

“You’re beautiful, Lexi,” he told me. “I’ll never let you go.” I couldn’t believe this was actually happening. I mean sure, I’d admired him from the comfort of my bedroom, but this, this is real.

“Come on, we better get going,” he smiled and grabbed my iPod from its holster. I hopped down from the truck, Mikey met me where I was standing, and grabbed my hand. We walked through the garages and made our way back to the entry hallway, hand in hand.

“Whoa now, kids, what’s going on here?” Gerard asked playfully.

“Nothing at all,” Mikey smiled as he dropped my hand. “Just retrieving a lost iPod.”

“Whatever you say, whatever you say,” Ray shook his head.

“I’ll be right back, I need to go say goodbye to my mother,” I said. I left the guys in the entrance hallway, I knew they wouldn’t hurt anything. I returned a few minutes later with Jenna by my side. We loaded up the car, turned around and began to drive towards the road. I turned around to face the house I had always known, the house that had raised me in my darkest hours. It was the house that taught me to be me, and taught me to love music as much as I do today. It was a sobering moment, knowing I would not be returning here for at least a month. I had never been away from my home that long, and, even though it’s huge and empty, it is my protector and my rock. For years its large gates had kept me safe from the cold outside world that I would now be exposed to. It was something I knew would happen eventually, I just wasn’t prepared for it to happen this soon.

Frank reached over and grabbed my iPod out of my lap.

“You know, I was going to listen to that!” I said sarcastically.

“Oh, well then, way to be antisocial Ms. Mikey’s lover,” He joked.

“You don’t know what you’re talking about,” Mikey said as he lightly hit Frank.

Frank turned on my iPod and began to scroll through the list of artists.

“The Used, Iron Maiden, Avenged Sevenfold,..” He named them all out, it was kind of obnoxious, really. “You’ve got good taste in music!”

“Ha, thanks. I get it from my dad,” I smiled as I grabbed my iPod back.

“No wonder you like her, bro,” Gerard laughed. “She’s something special.”

“And that’s why she’s with us,” Ray said as he patted my shoulder.

The rest of the car ride was filled with simple conversations based on whatever random thing one of us decided to bring up. It was relaxing and reassuring. It was nice to know I was in good hands, and the people I was with could truly understand me. It seemed like we had barely been in the car for 10 minutes before we stopped.

“We’re here, we’re here!” Mikey yelled. “Come on, come see the bus!”

He was happy to show me the ropes, and I was happy to be moving on to a new phase in my life.. My journey in life was just beginning, and I was going to spend it with the four most amazing guys on Earth. I can only imagine what the future has in store for me and my new friends. Their fame is increasing every passing day and I am just along for the ride, watching with the eyes of a fly of the wall.

“I’d like to introduce you to your new home,” Mikey smiled as he grabbed my hand and led me into the bus.
I was home, and for once, it felt good.