Born and Broken Every Single Time.

"How was the party?" Mrs. Way asked, glancing up from her ironing board as we all walked in the door, grumbling at any loud noise we heard. "That good then?"

"Break a few hearts there?" Mr. Way laughed as we all walked into the lounge and slumped on the sofa. Mikey was between Gerard and I and after realising this, he tensed up as if he thought he was going to be sexually attacked by us or something. "But of course not you Mikey, now you’re loved up and all."

"Shit!" Mikey shouted.

"MIKEY!" his mother yelled, making the rest of us laugh to ourselves.

"What time is it?" he asked, looking around frantically. When he was told it was 12.45 he practically leapt up, yelling about how he’d forgotten he was meeting Alicia at 1 in town and would die if he turned up late. He didn’t shower, obviously because he didn’t have the time and just overdosed with the deodorant and body spray before shooting out of the door. I watched out the window as he ran along the street until he was out of sight.

"Crazy that boy is," Mr. Way chuckled to himself. "Don’t get a woman, all they do is make you worry like that."

"Hey!" Mrs. Way grinned, throwing a shirt at her husband. "Ignore him, he’s an idiot. What are you two doing today? I need to know how much to make for dinner."

"Actually, I was thinking of going back to mine for a bit just to see where things lie," I muttered, gaining a surprised look from everyone. "But I’ll be back for dinner, if that’s okay with you?"

"Of course it is!" she grinned. "Gerard can come with you, means we can have some peace for the day."

"Okay," I smiled. Mrs. Way smiled in some sort of thank you to me for taking her son for the day as she turned her attention back to her husband, mocking that men weren’t innocent in causing worry either.

We spent the next hour getting ourselves sorted out. I had a shower, noticing a newly formed bruise on my stomach from where the bottle had smacked me last night. It stung like a bitch but I got over it soon enough. I’d returned to Mikey’s room quickly wrapped in my towel, conscious of being caught on the way. I pulled on some random baggy jeans and a white t-shirt, throwing my black Misfits hoodie on and automatically throwing my hood up. Most people picked up on that, the fact I wore hoods up indoors but I always wore my hood up unless instructed otherwise.

"Ready?" Gerard asked as he walked down the stairs, finding me waiting on the bottom step. I nodded and said my goodbye to his parents before scurrying along the street. We were silent for the first couple of minutes, I’m not sure if it could be described as awkward per se, maybe just a little strange.

I couldn’t help but smile as I thought back to the morning; to the moment I heard what he said to Eva. It was nice to know he felt like that, more than nice. I remember his confusion drain as the smile spread across his face as I told him I’d heard everything, he just pulled me as close to him as he could manage and just whispered to me that he meant every word. I remember just looking up at him with probably the dopiest smile on my face and feeling butterflies in my stomach. It was weird to hear him talk like that when he didn’t know I was around, it was like me hearing what he really thought. I remember that kiss, it wasn’t like the others, it seemed to actually mean something – just that little bit. And now here we were, walking in silence.

"So what spurred this, going home I mean?" he began awkwardly as he shoved his hands in his pockets, shivering from the cold.

"I kind of think I need to do it, they’re my parents," I shrugged. "I can’t stay at yours forever."

"Try telling my parents that," he laughed. "They’d gladly adopt you."

"I could believe that," I smirked as I glanced up at him. I had this urge to put my arm around him as we walked, but I didn’t. I just sighed with a smile as I shook the idea from my mind. The following few minutes were filled of general chat, which grabbed neither of our interest before we reached my house.

I pulled the key out of my pocket and shoved it in the door until I could open it. I walked in cautiously, shutting the door behind us after Gerard walked in. I asked him just to bear with me if anything happened, I appreciated him being here but I didn’t want him to feel obliged to stay.

I walked down the hall slowly, just looking about for some sign of movement. I knew my dad was away on work still and that if anyone was here it would be my mother. I looked in the living room just to find empty bottle after empty bottle on the tables, some having fallen to the ground. My heart sank, this place looked horrid. I walked to the kitchen without a word and headed straight for the drinks cabinet, empty. I hated this feeling, knowing that she was still drinking, that even though I’d moved out just for a break she had made no effort to change. I’d forgotten I wasn’t alone by now, too wrapped up in my sad reflecting. I was reminded of Gerard’s presence as I felt his arms wrap around my waist from behind, pulling me close to him.

"Are you okay?" he whispered. I nodded weakly. I honestly didn’t know if I could talk, this was horrible. All my life I’ve had to put up with her drinking in some way or another, only in recent years it had escalated. For the first time in my life I’d left home for more than a few nights and I honestly believed she’d make an effort, but I was wrong. And it stung, a lot.

"You sure?" he questioned, resulting in me nodding feebly again as I pulled myself from his hold. I dragged myself upstairs and heard Gerard follow casually after me. I walked straight into my room and froze. It wasn’t the same as before, it was worse. Any poster that had been untouched was now destroyed and cast to the floor. My room was truly a shadow of it’s former self, all that remained untouched were my possessions. My guitars sat in the corner on their stands, my photos remained on my bedside table along with the other bits and bobs. It was shattering.

I walked over to my bed, just sitting down cautiously and looking around before burying my head in my hands. I sighed deeply, just trying with all my might not to let this get to me. I’d come here in the hope that something would have changed for the better, sadly there was change – for the worse.

"Want to go home?" Gerard mumbled as he sat down beside me. I felt the bed adjust to his weight as he put his around me reassuringly.

"No," I replied quietly, my voice faltering. "I-I need to wait for her to come home."

"You can’t," Gerard frowned as I looked over at him. He seemed so concerned and I guess that’s what tipped me over the edge as I felt a tear roll down my face. "We can go, just get anything you want and we’ll leave."

I looked at him thoughtfully for a moment as I digested the idea, nodding in acceptance before hugging him in thanks. I honestly never wanted to pull away from the hug. It just felt so safe. Safety was something I could barely remember in this house. My room had been my haven, my escape for the rest of the world where I could just ’be’. It had me on every wall, my personality oozing through the floorboards but now it was nothing. This wasn’t my room, this was just a room that I used to live in and it crushed me.

I forced myself up and pulled a random bag from my cupboard. I threw a few handfuls of clothes in along with my photos that were dotted around the room. If I ever came back to find my photos destroyed, I don’t think I’d get over that with ease. As I knelt down to zip up my bag I heard the front door slam shut and I froze.

I looked up to see Gerard just staring at me through wide eyes. We both sat in silence as we heard footsteps gradually grow closer. It sickened me as a scent of alcohol entered my room and I felt my chest tighten. I honestly felt like crying, surely she couldn’t be…

"What the hell are you doing here?" she slurred as she walked into my room, looking at Gerard before glaring at me.

"He’s just getting some things then coming back to ours," Gerard replied calmly, realising I didn’t want to talk.

"I was talking to my son," she growled. "What the hell is up with you today you fat shit?"

"Don’t talk to him like that," Gerard interrupted, taking me slightly by surprise. "You may think you can treat him like shit when his dad’s around or when no one’s around but you’re not treating him like shit when I’m around."

"Pssh," she grinned. "What are you going to do? Just go home son, enough pretending you actually like this little freak."

"What am I going to do?" he smirked as he walked over to her. "I’m going to walk out of this house and take your son with me. I’m not going to shout and I’m not going to use any violence. Maybe you should use me as a fucking example."

"How dare you!" she frowned, slapping him feebly and making him smirk.

"Leopard, spots," he smiled. "You know your son, your only child over there came here today to talk to you because he thought maybe with him gone you might have changed. Look at him, really look at him – does it make you proud that you make him feel like that?"

"No," she muttered as she glanced over at me. "But who the hell do you think you are to come into my house and talk to me like that?"

"A hell of a bigger person than you will ever be, come on Frank," he said, turning to me. I nodded as I picked up my bag and followed him out of the room. I kept my gaze to the ground as I passed my mother, not wanting to interact with her at all. As I closed the door behind me and scurried to catch up with Gerard I muttered a quiet thank you to him.

"Don’t thank me," he replied calmly. "I will not let anyone treat you like shit, okay? Mother or not."

I nodded to let him know I understood what he was saying and after a few moments of walking in silence he stopped and looked at me for a moment. I looked away awkwardly under his scrutinising gaze before turning back to see him smirking.

"What?" I asked, giggling slightly.

"Nothing," he smiled, sliding his arm gently onto my waist before continuing our walk.