Second Chances, Bad Habits

When my tears finally dried up, and I managed to calm myself enough to just sniveling, I sat up from Ashley and crossed my legs. I was waiting for the minute that he’d make an excuse, and make a run for it. I mean who sticks around for a girl who’s sobbing over something as stupid as this.

“Deli, I’m so sorry. It’s not that I didn’t trust you or something like that it was… well… because I was afraid that if I told you just exactly who I am that you’d never want to go out with me; or that you’d just want to sponge off my fame.” Ashley said, brushing hair out of my face. Why was he being so sweet to me? He doesn’t even know me that well, and he’s here, next to me kneeling, apologising to me for something that’s my fault.

“I’d never sponge off you or say no.” I said, still sniffling. Why would I sponge off him? That’s cruel, and selfish. As far as I’m concerned, if I want something, I have to get it by myself, not by stepping on other people.

“I didn’t think you would but so many girls have done it to all of us that it’s hard to not think that.” He spoke softly. I still didn’t get why he cared so much. We only met a few days ago. I mean I like him a lot, I have to admit, but I don’t get why he likes me.

“I-I’m sorry.” I wasn’t just apologising for causing this situation, I was saying sorry for hurting him, for not trusting him, for not being there for him.

“You have nothing to be sorry about Deli. I-I really do care about you. I just didn’t want something like my fans, my fame, my band, or touring to make you not feel the same way back.” Call me prejudice, but from the stories I’ve heard of rock stars, they ain’t all that into spilling their emotions like this. He must really mean it. I wanted to tell him how much he meant to me. In just a few days I’d gone from being slightly scared of him to finding it difficult to not at least say hi to him everyday.

Staring at him in shock from what he’d just said, I saw the panic flash across his face. No, he thinks I don’t like him back. Tell him Deli, you’ve got to tell him now. It’s not that hard, you’ve got the words in your head, come on. Just say it!

“I-I really care about you too.” I managed to get out. 10 points for Deli for actually working her mouth. Relief swept over me, I hope I don’t lose him now.

I was too busy calming down from thinking that I’d lost him to notice at first what Ashley was doing. He put his hands on either side of my face and pressed his lips to mine. As soon as his lips touched mine, the butterflies exploded, my mind went wild, my heart raced. I couldn’t think, but somehow I was kissing back. I couldn’t explain the way I was feeling. It felt like everything was exploding in happiness all at once.

I closed my eyes, as he deepened the kiss, before eventually pulling away. Opening my eyes, I guess Ash must have felt something too because he just looked at me in shock. But I knew it was a happy shock in a way. Catching my breath, I smiled at Ash, which he was quick to return.

“You haven’t kissed a lot of guys before have you?” He said still smiling goofily. It made my heart skip to know that kissing me made him so happy.

“Not really.” I said giggling like a loon.

I don’t know what came over us but we just sat there smiling at each other and having little giggles. Nothing else mattered at the moment. It was just us. Just me and him. I didn’t want this feeling to go away. Not ever.

“Hey, do you wanna go grab something to eat or whatever?” Ash asked nervously, running his hands through his hair.

“Yeah, I’d like that.” I replied smiling, trying my best to hide the tint that was trying desperately to paint my cheeks.

Ash stood up, before holding his hand out to help me up. Lifting myself off the floor, I fell straight into Ash’s arms, all but screaming in pain. I’d completely forgotten about my ribs and bruise. I hadn’t taken any pain killers for at least 4 hours now, but I also hadn’t told Ash. Which would explain the look of worry on his face.

The pain was getting worse, but I couldn’t cry or scream for some reason. Instead I just had a vice hold onto Ash, burying my head into his chest. I could feel him stroking my hair, and in the distance asking what was wrong. But I couldn’t concentrate, the pain was getting unbearable. Why did it hurt this much? It hadn’t been this bad before. I tried to calm myself down, but in doing so, everything just disappeared. All I could see was Ash’s mouth moving, but no sound, and Ruth running towards us. That’s when everything went dark.