Always Something More

“Did I tell you how beautiful you look?” Andy said to me as he grabbed my hand from across the dinner table. We went to an Olive Garden for a nice dinner date.

After an awkward lunch with John, we drove back to my house and relaxed for a few hours. Andy went to his room to take a nap and I called Kennedy to tell him about lunch. All he said to me about the whole situation was “Maybe Johns looking out for you, and just trying to make sure that Andy is right for you.” He said as if he agreed with what John said.

“Yeah I don't think he cares, I think hes just a jerk and has to be rude all the time.”

“Rae, you and John have been in each others lives like forever, so he does care and doesn't want to see you get hurt.”

“Yeah I guess but he doesn't have to be a jerk.”

“I think him being a jerk means that hes looking out for you.” I couldn't help but to think that maybe Kennedy was right. Maybe John was just being an older brother and looking after me. But he didn't have to, I know Andy wouldn't hurt me, like how I hurt so many people. But why did John care so much, what would it matter? It made me mad to think about so I got ready for our date. I went to my closet and pull out a cute top and black fitted jeans. I had just bought a new pair of heels and wanted to wear them and thought this was a perfect opportunity.

As I was in the bathroom putting on my makeup and doing my hair, I heard foot steps coming closer to the room. I turned and saw Andy just outside the door frame looking at me with a wide smile.

“What?” The way he looked at me gave me butterflies in my stomach.

“You just look-” he walked in more and looked at me straight in the eyes. “smokin hot!” I started to laugh and nudged him in the shoulder.

“Oh shut up and go get ready.” I ordered him, he turned around and I playfully slapped his butt. He let out a little yelp and yelled out that he'd get me back.

We left the house around 6 and drove to the near by Olive Garden. We asked for a table and they told us we had to wait a little but Olive Garden was a place you waited for, the never ending bread sticks and salad was all worth it. We got a table shortly after and we ordered some drinks and waited.

I looked at Andy and gave him a bright smile, “Actually this is the first time you told me how beautiful I look, all the other times were either hot, sexy, and the weirdest one foxy, but I appreciate the compliments. I gotta say you look pretty smokin hott also.” I said with a smile and a small wink.

The waitress came back to the table with our drinks and some bread and salad to start off, I felt like I was in heaven. We nibbled on the food and made small talk, I think we were to hungry to focus on conversation.

“I talked to Kennedy today and he said he might come over tomorrow, I'll tell him to bring his guitar so you guys can do a little session.” Once Andy heard the word guitar his full attention was on me, he nodded his head and had a big smile on.

“Dude that's be awesome. He such a good guitarist. But if I could jam out with Jared then my life would be complete.” he was showing his fan boy side, knowing all about The Maine. “He seriously is a guitar god, he has magical fingers that slide up and down...” I couldn't help but to choke on the piece of bread I was swallowing I was laughing so hard. What he just said sounded so wrong especially coming out of his mouth.

“Shut up, you didn't let me finish. I was saying how his fingers...they...well they... the way he plays the guitar is amazing okay, gosh.” he started to get all flustered and it was so adorable. But I still couldn't help but to laugh.

“I'm sorry, I know what you mean, he is a guitar god. He knows how to use those fingers.” He started to agree until he heard the end of the sentence and sent me a glare. But then a moment later he couldn't help but to laugh.

“Are you guys ready to order?” Said our waitress, she stopped in between me and Andy and leaned more on her left leg, she was holding her note pad in her left hand and a pencil in her right and looked between me and Andy with a forced smile on.

Andy nodded at me, telling me to order first.

“Can I just have the cheese raviolis please” the waitress nodded her head as she wrote down the order. She looked back at Andy and waited for him give his order.

“Oh um I'll have the fettuccine alfredo.” he looked up at her and gave her a simple thank you before she took our menus and left us.

“I'm so hungry.” I said as I leaned down to take a sip of my ice tea.

“Same here. So John seems pretty cool.” This wasn't the topic I would prefer to talk about at a nice dinner. I nodded my head.

“Yeah, that's why everyone loves him.”

“Is it awkward to be around him?” He asked curiously.

Since the day I got back to Arizona, I never felt awkward or uncomfortable around John. I'd rather not be around him because every time I am around him the butterflies in my stomach came back and I can't help but to really look at him. And every time I was around him he knew how to make me upset. He knew that what exactly to say or do to make me hate his guts. But I never felt uncomfortable around him because of what had happened.

“John has always been my best friend, and once I got back here he told me that he's not mad at me and is over the whole thing. I mean I guess when I first saw him I was worried he'd be mad at me but I don't think it's ever been awkward.” I remember the first night I got back home there he was standing in my kitchen and his eyes were burning into mine and all I could think about was how I wish I could jump in his arms and tell him how I'm happy I was to see him.

“Well that's good that you still have a good relationship.” If only he knew that me and John didn't really have that relationship anymore. I think if I stayed with in Arizona me and John would have been completely different. The way he acts around me now just makes it seem like if I stayed him and I would act different.

I nodded my head and gave him a smile. I didn't want to talk about John anymore, I wanted this night to be about me and Andy. The food came shortly after and we ate our food rather quickly. We didn't talk as much as I would of liked but at least we were occupied with food. I looked around the restaurant and saw other couples together, it made me wonder if me and Andy would ever get to that point. I mean I had strong feels for him but now that he's here there was something that was making me pull away.

I watched one couple, they sat across from each other and you could see the way they looked at each other that they were meant to be. The way their eyes would lock and you could see a little blush creep over the girls cheeks and she'd look away embarrassed that she started to blush. But her boyfriend just kept staring, not in a creepy way but in a way that says 'you're the most beautiful person in the world and I love when you blush.' I turned my head and looked at Andy who was already looking at me. I looked at him back and gave him a shy smile, I thought to myself if anyone was watching me and Andy and thinking how cute we were. I couldn't help but to look away and smile. I couldn't get the way his eyes looked out of my head. I was so glad he was here and all I wanted was to be with him.

“Are you ready to go?” I heard Andy say.

I looked back at him and gave him a smile and a nod. We found our waitress and got the check. Andy paid for both of us, like a gentlemen would do. We got to the car and Andy opened my door for me and made sure I got in safely. As we drove home, our hands were laced together and he rubbed his thumb over my hand. Through the whole ride I couldn't help but to smile. I was just so happy.

“Do you want to watch a movie?” I asked as we got inside of the house and took off our shoes.

“I'm pretty tired, I was thinking about heading up to bed.” I tried not to show my disappointment, I just wanted to cuddle with Andy on the couch and feel his touch.

“Oh yeah that's fine.” I walked over to give him a small peck on the lips. “Good night.” I gave him a smile, and he turned around to go up the stairs but then turned back around.

“If you want to come and cuddle in my bed, you can.” he said and then turned back around, he probably already knew the answer.

“Let me get ready and I'll be in a few.” I yelled out to him as he was mid way up the stairs.

I went to my purse to grab my phone, I turned it off through dinner so there wouldn't be any distractions. I saw I had one new message, I opened it up and was taken back by what it had said and who it was from.

JohnO 8:45 p.m.
“I need to talk to you.”

I walked up the stairs thinking about what he wanted to talk to me and what I should reply with. As I got to the last stair and started to walk to my room and replied.

“I'll meet you at the pond at 11.” I typed out quickly and threw my phone on my bed. Should I even be doing this, I should be going to see John? I knew it was wrong but I wanted to hear what he wanted to talk about.

I got dress in some P.J shorts and a v-neck comfy shirt. I knocked softly on the door and started to open it up. I saw that he was on his bed on his lap top. When he saw me and shut it close and gave me a smile.

“I didn't think you were coming, it took you a while.”

“Oh Kennedy text ed me I had to reply. Sorry. But I'm here now.” I walked over to him and got on the bed right in front of him.

He leaned in a little bit and whispered, “You look adorable right now.” You never really hear guys tell you how you look adorable, so it was nice to hear something different. After he told me that he leaned in more and started to kiss me softly, and once I reacted the kissed got more headed. I pushed him back, so he was laying on his back and I was straddling his hips. I felt his arms roam around my body, he finally went up my shirt and his hands were on my lower. I let out a small groan from his cold hands touching my skin, and I instantly got goosebumps all over my skin. I pulled away from his lips and started to kiss and nibble on his neck. As I was focusing on his neck his hands started to move high up my body. I didn't mind when they got to my breast, it felt good. He squeezed this softly through my bra, and a moment later he moved my bra up and grabbed my breast. I let out a moan, and leaned my head in the crease of his neck and head and let him keep touching me. He removed his hands and went to the bottom of my shirt and lifted it up, which I let him take off. He went behind me was about to snap of my bra when I realized what was happening and I didn't want it.

I lifted up and got off of him and sat down next to him.

“I'm sorry I just got into the moment.” I put my shirt back on and nodded my head slowly.

“It's fine, I'm just not ready for that yet.”

“Why not?” he asked as he pulled him self up and leaned his back against the head board. I turned my head to look at him and gave him a small glare and a confused look.

“What?” I snapped back.

“I'm just saying, I like you, a lot, you like me. Why aren't you ready?” He said like it was no big deal.

I started to get off the bed and pulled down my shirt and shorts. “I can't believe you're actually saying this Andy. We're not even girlfriend boyfriend yet. I'm not just going to sleep around with anyone.” I shook my head and started to walk back to the door.

“Right, you only making John sleep with you.” I said harshly. I stopped in my tracks and was shocked that out of all the people to say this, it was coming from him, from the boy I trust the most.

“Really you're going to play that game just because you're not getting any tonight.” I just shook my head and walked out of his room and closed his door. I walked to my room, put on some jeans and walked out, I saw Andy walking closer to me, with an apologetic expression. I looked passed it and didn't want to hear what he was about to say.
“I'm so sorry Rae. I didn't mean it. Please for-” I cut him off and walked passed him.

“Save it Andy. I don't want to hear it.” I lifted my hand telling him to stop talking. I walked passed him and went down the stairs thinking about calling John and telling to meet me at the pond.

“Where are you going?” Andy yelled out to me.

“I'm going on a walk, I need some fresh air.” I yelled back.

“Do you want to talk and have company?” he asked

I turned around and glared at him. “No.” I spat out and walked out the door.

I called John quickly and waited for him to pick up the phone.

“Hello?” he said sounding like I just woke him up.

“Hey, its Rae. Were you sleeping?”

“Oh hey, yeah but its cool. Whats up?”

“I'm walking to the pond now, if you wanna meet now.”

“I'll meet you on the side walk by my apartment. And we can walk down together.” As he said the last part I couldn't help but to smile, I think my feeling towards John will never go away.

“Okay see you in a few.” he said our goodbyes and hung up the phone. I was scared, nervous, excited I was feeling everything right now. I knew this was a bad decision but I wanted those butterflies in my stomach.

As I got closer to him apartment, I saw him standing there smoking a cigarette. Which was a huge turn on to me. I gave him a small wave and he returned it. He flicked the end of the cigarette out and walked a few steps closer to me.

“Hey.” He said softly.

I looked up at him and couldn't help but to smile. “Hey.”

that was all we had to say to each other, and I felt like we were best friends again. I was so mad at him earlier today, for being so rude and just embarrassing me in front of Andy, but I now realized that what he did was because he was protecting me, and he did care about me.

We started to walk towards the pond and I felt his hand grab a hold of mine, I was taken back and looked up at him but he was still looking forward, like it was no big deal. I did the same, I looked forward but my smile grew even wider and the blush might of crept more over my cheeks.

For some reason this just felt right.