Always Something More

The stars shined above us there was as light breeze that made the trees and grass around us sway back and forth. We laid on a blanket, cuddling up against each other. I laid on and my side and wrapped my arms around Andy's waist. Andy's arm was wrapped around my shoulders and his other arm was on top of my arm around my waist. Every so often I would feel him kiss the top my head and tell me how beautiful I was.

“I'm always here for you Rae, you know that right?” I hadn't told him about me and my sisters fight but he knew something was up with me.

“I know, I just don't want to talk about it and ruin this perfect night.” I scooted a little so I could look up at him. “I just want to lay here with you.” he said a soft 'alright' and kissed my forehead again, which made me smile.

“I bought you your favorite cookies.”

“Fudge cover oreos?” I jumped out of his arms and sat up. He laughed and nodded head, he reached for his back pack and took out a bag filled with the best cookies in the world. He handed me the bag and I took a few of them out.

“Thank you for all of this.” I said as I crossed my legs under neath each other.

“Your welcome, I felt like we haven’t had so much alone time. And after seeing you so upset when I got home, I knew this was a good idea.” I leaned forward and grabbed his face and pressed my lips to his. As he started to kiss back I couldn't help but to smile. He pulled away and gave me a questioning expression.

“What?” he said in a small laugh.

“Oh nothing, I'm just happy to be here with you.”

He gave me another kiss, “good, I'm glad were here together.” We laid back down and snuggled back into the same positions.

“Are you ready for college?” I heard Andy say a few minutes later.

I nodded my head “Yes, I can't wait. Are you?”

“I am, you wanna know why?” I turned my head so I could see him better, I gave him a soft smile and nodded my head again.

“Because I'll be with you.” After he said that I sat up and laced my fingers with his. I couldn't help but to smile at his words. “ I want you to be mine, Rae.” My smile grew and butterflies were exploding in my stomach.

“Will you be my girlfriend?” My jaw dropped a little and my eyes widened. I suddenly got nervous, of course I wanted to be his girlfriend but I was scared to take this to the next level. I just started at him as he waited for an answer.

“Of course.”
~

“Are you sure you want to go? We could order some take out and rent a movie.” We were on our way to the party that was going on tonight. Andy was driving, our hands were laced and I turned my body so I could look at him better.

“Come on Rae, it'll be fun.” He had no clue what parties were like in Arizona. They were way more crazier than Michigan parties.

“Ha, you don't know what your getting your self into.”

I turned back into my seat and watched as we got closer to the designated party house. We parked not to far away from the house. As we got into the house it was already pact, I grabbed a hold of Andy's hand was we moved our selves around trying to find Kennedy or one of the other boys.

“Rae, Andy” We looked behind us and saw Pat yelling for us. We gave him a smile and moved our selves over to him.

“Hey man.” Andy said as they did their little bro handshake. I said my hello and gave a small wave. I looked around for Kennedy, I needed to talk to him.

“Have you seen Kennedy?” I asked Pat. He too also looked around and shrugged his shoulders.

“Oh he was outside, I'm pretty sure.” I nodded my head.

“I'm going to go find him. Do you want to stay here or come?” I looked at Andy and asked him.

“Oh uh I guess I'll stay here for a bit and come find you.” I gave him a smile and gave him a small kiss on his cheek and gave Pat another wave and left the two in the living room.

I stopped by the kitchen to grab a cup of whatever was out for me to drink. I walked around until I got to the door that led to outside. I stood in the door frame and looked out, looking for Kennedy. I stepped down to the steps to the grass and kept looking around for him. Once I spotted him on the side of the house, I walked over and he caught my eyes and waved me over.

“Hey, I didn't think you were coming.” He said as I walked over and wrapped my arm around his waist and he put his arm across my shoulders and pulled me closer to him.

“Yeah, well Andy wanted to come.” I said in a plain voice.

“Oh right, well I guess we'll have to show him how Arizonians party, huh?” He said and I couldn't help but to laugh.

“Yeah cause us Michiganite don't know how to part-tay!” I said with a shout. We stepped away from the group and were walking back inside of the house.

“So I have good new I guess.” I said in a nervous voice. I looked up at Kennedy and he looked down at me.

“Oh yeah, and whats that?”

“Andy he um, he asked m-me to be his uh girlfriend.” I stumbled over my words, it felt weird to be saying that.

“No way, that's awesome Rae, you guys are good for each other.” I stopped at his words and just looked up at him.

“Are we?” I asked back.

He gave me a confused expression. “Uh yeah, I mean you guys seem to be really into each other.”

“Yeah we are but it still feels wrong.”

“Why does it feel wrong?”

“Because of him.” I gestured out towards John, who was smiling at his friends he was talking to.

“Rae you need to get over him and that whole situation. Andy is the one for you now. John was a could have been but he's not anymore.”

I let out a sigh and nodded my head.

“I don't know, Kennedy. Just looking at him now, I have butterflies in my stomach.” My smile grew when I heard John's laugh. I saw Kennedy shaking his head at me.

“You need to figure out what you want.” I took my eyes off of John and looked up at Kennedy and nodded my head.

“Yeah I know.” I looked back at John who was now looking at me, I looked away but that didn't mean I wasn't smiling back towards him. “Well it looks like my cup is empty, lets go get a refill.” I said as I looked into my cup and wanted more alcohol. We headed back inside and got our selves something to drink.

We were walking around when I stopped in my tracks and my stomach dropped when I saw Andy talking to Carmen, but it was probably the other way around. I bet Carmen spotted him and started up the conversation. I hurried over to him and save him.

“Yeah I’ll take that.” Andy said to Carmen. I was right behind her when she turned around, she jumped a little and let out a small gasp.

“Oh hey Rae, I was just about to get me and Andy something to drink.”

I lifted up the drink I got for Andy, “No need, I brought you something.” I gave him the drink and gave a smile.

“Oh thanks.” he lifted the cup to his lip and he took a drink.

“Awe,” Carmen said with a pout, “we'll I guess we'll have a rain check.” She started to walk away, she gave Andy a smirk and wink and finally walked away.

“Please don't have a rain check with her.” I said with worried eyes.

He let out a laugh. “She's not that bad when shes around me and the other guys. But I wont.”

“She is bad, she's a bitch. Don't trust her at all.”

“Okay baby.” he wrapped his arm around my shoulders and held me close.

That was what is was like for the rest of the night. Andy, Kennedy and I talking, as Andy held me close to him, drawing shapes into my shoulder. Every so often someone would join the group and talk but then travel back to the kitchen and they wouldn't come back. I felt my phone vibrate in my clutch, I pulled it out and got scared when I saw his name across the screen.

”You and Andy look pretty cute together.” I didn't want to smile at Johns words but I couldn't help but to do that. I looked up and searched the room for his green eyes but I didn't see them.

”Where are you?” I typed back. I locked my phone and held it in my hand and waited for a response.

“Who texted you?” I snapped out of my thoughts and looked up at Andy.

“Oh it was just-”I got distracted when he texted back.

”In the basement, wanna come join me?” I felt my face blush. I looked back up at Andy who was staring at me.

“What?” I asked him.

“I just asked who texted you and making you blush?” I felt embarrassed that he noticed, and that made me blush even more.

“I'm not blushing, my dad texted me and it made me mad. It doesn't matter.” Andy nodded his head and let out a small “oh”. I wanted to text John back but I was afraid that Andy would see.

“I'm going to go to the bathroom and get something else to drink.” I leaned up and gave Andy a kiss on the lips and left him. I got into the kitchen and saw Kennedy.

“Hey, friend.” I said sweetly to him.

“What do you need?” He said quickly.

“Can you just go chill with Andy? I'm going to go talk to John.”

“And by talk you mean talk.” he said the second talk slower and he winked his eye. I immediately slapped his arm.

“No I don't mean that. Gosh Kennedy, get your mind out of the gutters.” I said and smiled. “Just go hang out with my boyfriend.” I started to leave Kennedy when he shouted out to me.

“Don't do anything stupid please.” I didn't say anything or turn around because that meant I was promising him I wouldn't. I didn't want to do anything with John but when I was around him, the butterflies in my stomach took over and I couldn't help it.

I opened the door that led to the basement. It was much cooler down here than up stairs, it made the hairs on my arms stick up, and goose bumps were all over me. I looked over and saw John sitting on a stool with an acoustic guitar in his arms. He looked up and gave me a smile. I didn't walk over to him, I just looked over at him as he kept playing his guitar.

“What are you playing?”

“Nothing, just playing random chords.” he looked up again as he put down the guitar and stood up and started to walk over to me. He got closer to me and lightly grabbed my hand.

“Hey,” he lightly said to me and I said it back. I looked at his chest tattoo that was peeking out of his shirt. I reached out and softly traced over the letters of the tattoo. I put my hand back down to my side and looked up at John. I walked away from him and went over to some pictures that were hanging up on the wall.

“Why are you guys dressed up so nicely?” I turned back and John was still over where I left him, but he turned to look at me.

“What?”

“This picture.” I pointed to it. “You and the boys are wearing ties, and vest on a stage.” He let out a laugh and looked to the ground.

“Oh, that was our first show and we wanted to look nice but instead we looked fucking stupid.” He walked closer to me and kept a small laugh going.

“You guys look like babies.” I looked over at him and smiled.

We looked at a few more photos and he told me the story behind them. I didn't realize that his hand was holding on to mine until he started to rub his thumb over my knuckles. He saw that I was looking at our hands, when he put his hand under my chin and lifted it up so he could look into my eyes. He tucked a strand of my hair behind my ear. His head was leaning down to kiss me but I turned around and went to the other wall with more photos.

I felt him come up behind me, he moved my hair from my neck and moved it to the side, over my shoulder. He put light kisses along my neck, I turned my head a little to the side that he was kissing and closed my eyes. I let out a small sigh as his kisses started to get a little more rougher. It felt to good to have his lips on mine.

“M-Me and uh, I-I can't do this John.” I stuttered out. I pulled away from him and turned so I was facing him.

“Then why are you here?” He said a little harshly. I was taken back from his question.

“I uh I-I don't know.” I felt guilty that I was down here. I didn't do anything but the fact that I decided to leave Andy while I was down here with John just felt wrong.

“Andy asked me to be his girlfriend.” I said softly but he still heard me because he automatically looked worried but he didn't want me to know so he stated to laugh.

“You didn't say yes, did you?” He calmed down from his laughing and looked very serious.

“Yeah, I did actually.” I was scared that I was hurting John. He looked hurt.

He turned around and took a few steps forward and ran his hand through his hair and spinned around again and came closer to me.

“Why? What about me Rae?” He said in a stern voice.

“I'm s-sorry John, but you and I will never work out.”

“But why? We don't know that, we've never tried.”

“Really John? You dated my sister, you know how dead I would be if she found out that were dating?”

“So that's the only thing stopping you? Is your sister? Wow Rae, I thought you were stronger than that.”

“She's not the only reason but shes a big part of it. She's my sister, I don't want to lose her any more than I already have.” I remembered our conversation the other night and how she didn't want me as a sister and I didn't want to believe that she really meant that, but if I dated John I knew that she would really feel that way.

He just shook his head and looked at the ground. I didn't know what to say or do now, so I started to walk towards the stairs. I looked back at him and wanted him to say something, to grab my wrist and tell me that I was making the wrong decision, all I wanted was to see how much he wanted me, but he didn't he just stood there. I looked at him for a little bit longer and went back up the stairs to where the party was.

I realized how many people were here, and how the lights were so bright and the air was filled with smoke and the smell of alcohol. I started to feel really hott and light headed. I pushed and rushed my self out side to the fresh air. I sat on one of the steps and watched everyone have a good time.

“What are you doing out here?” I looked up and saw Kennedy standing next to me, looking down at me.

“I uh just needed some fresh air. Wheres Andy?” he shrugged his arms and looked around.

“he said he was going to go look for you and then I don’t know.” I nodded my head and wonder where he would be at. I pulled out my phone and text him but I didn't get a response. I got up from the steps and went inside to look for him. I started in the kitchen and then moved to the dinning room and then to the living room and he wasn't insight. I turned around to Kennedy.

“Where could he be?” I started to worry, sure he was a big boy and he could handle himself but that didn't mean I wasn't worried.

“Um maybe he traveled to another room while we were looking around.”

“Yeah I guess.” I looked around the room and everyone looked the same, it made it hard to focus. But all I was looking for was Andy's red beanie that he was wearing. Everyone around us were dancing or making out so it made it even harder.

“I'm going to go look in the kitchen again.” I said and started to walk towards the kitchen. I moved my head from left to right looking around for him. I got to the kitchen and there he was but he wasn't the one I was looking for. John stood there with a beer in his hand, leaning up against the counter.

I watch him start coughing as he swallowed his drink down. His eyes were popping out of his head and he looked like he had just seen a ghost. I gave him a questioning look when his eyes landed on me. He lifted his hand with the bottle of beer up and he eyes traveled off of me to somewhere behind me. I slowly turned around and I now knew what Garrett and Carmen felt like. And it didn't feel good.