Too Much

Alex (2 weeks later)
It was the usual Friday and the bell had just rang signaling the end of school, and the start of the weekend. Rushing from the confines of Baltimore High I walked briskly over to my car, pushing myself up onto the waxed hood of my car. Patiently I waited for the arrival of about half of my friends – e.g Jack, Maddie and Allie. Since after the night we spent by the baseball field and such, Allie and Maddie have been riding to and fro school ever since with me and Jack.

“SHOTGUN!”

The familiar voice rang through the school parking lot reaching my ears instantly. Snapping my head upwards I identified the familiar wave of jet black hair approaching, sprinting towards where my car was situated; Jack and Maddie groaning in defeat as they trailed, this time more slowly, behind Allie.

In the past two weeks I couldn’t help but notice a change in Allie, she had grown more into herself. She wasn’t constantly worrying about what everyone else was saying about her. She was more carefree. I believed this newly found insight into Allie is who she truly is deep down – I liked that.

“Hey best friend!”

She sang in her unusually cheery voice as she made her way to meet me by the hood. She positioned herself between my legs, me sitting her standing, her scent of vanilla teasing my nostrils. Unable to contain the toothy grin behind my lips I laughed at her hyper nature, wrapping my arms around her waist and pulling her to me for a hug, her arms immediately wrapping around my neck.

“Hey to you to, now let’s get out of here”

I whispered into the crook of her neck before slowly pulling out of the hug, sliding off the hood after doing so. Allie climbed into the passenger seat, a look of triumph that was taunting Jack and Maddie in the backseat. Starting up the car the gentle ticking over of the engine echoed inside before it started, my radio blasting throughout sending us all jumping at the sudden outburst.

“SHIT sorry”

Fiddling with the volume control I attempted to lower the sound and keep concentration on the road ahead of me. Allie frantically pushed my hand away from the controls, pointing at the road silently indicating for me to watch where I’m going. She managed to turn the volume down however it soon increased minutes later as the sound of Good Charlotte blasted through my speakers.

“MOTHER FUCKING TUNE!”

Maddie and Allie shouted in unison before looking at each other in bewilderment, breaking down in girly giggles as they did so. It was weird how they did that; speak the exact same words at the exact same time. It freaked the hell out of me and Jack; the looks on our faces say it all.

“Sorry this has to be done”

Jack piped up in the back, leaning down slightly he grasped something on his side of the car door. Drumming my fingers on the leather steering wheel in time with the music I noticed Jack little scene, groaning out loud I glared at my Lebanese best friend through the overhead mirror.

“Every time Jack…EVERY FUCKING TIME!”

I shouted at Jack in an attempt to try and stop him causing a scene, a scene I’ve witnessed every time Good Charlotte came on the radio. Maddie and Allie’s eyes flickered between the two of us, they literally looked like deer’s caught in car headlines – it was amusing to say the least.

My pleas however did nothing to deter Jack. He continued to roll down the back window, standing up and leaning half his body out of the window he proceeded to sing – well more like badly shout – the lyrics to The Anthem.

Maddie was the only one who found Jack’s little…scene, entertaining. Navigating us around the corner and into a busy housing estate, I cussed mentally. Outwardly I was begging with Jack to stop and get back in the car before I drove his ass into a branch or some object that would injure him. Allie shook her head in disarray at Jack, her face cringing at his sheer lack of vocal skills. She sloughed down in her seat as I turned into the estate she only looked up every now and then to check if a poor cat hadn’t lost its life.

In angst my pressure from my foot on the gas began to secretly increase, praying we would reach the end of the estate without embarrassment from Jack – oh how I was wrong. Just as we were reaching the end of the estate, a huge sigh of relief washing over me…

“WHUD UP BITCHESSSS!”

Jack lifting up his one arm in a gangster fashion, his voice changing to do the same as he addressed a few elderly women who were walking along the sidewalk…probably to a W.I meeting I thought. Allie gasped out loud sliding further down the seat so that she was almost cramped down under my dashboard. I outwardly groaned again, momentarily using my free hand to face palm.

“JACK BASSAM BARAKAT GET THE FUC..”

I swerved the car instantly cutting Maddie off from finishing her sentence. She stared at me hard in the mirror before I averted my gaze over to the old women on the sidewalk, she followed my gaze her eyes widening in terror before she mouthed a quick thank you in the mirror.

“YOU WANNA SHIZZLE ON MY…..WOAH”

Jack was dragged from the window and back into the car with brute force. Once his whole body was in the car I instantly wound up the window from my controls at the front. Maddie let go of the balled up shirt material she held in her fist before inspecting the sour and disgusted faces of the elderly women.

“You just couldn’t help yourself could you?”

I spoke up from the driver seat avoiding Jack and concentrating on navigating my way out of this estate and onto our street. Jack dropped his head shamefully as the song on the radio came to an end, fiddling with his hands nervously in his lap.

“Urgh Allie it’s safe to come out now”

I joked as I laughed at the crouched figure still underneath my dash. Mocking a fake laugh Allie squinted her dark eyes slightly and poked her tongue out at me; adjusting herself to move carefully she climbed back into her seat beside me, her feet lifting up and resting on my dash this time.

“HEY feet off the dash”

I yelled at my best friend her deep chocolate eyes glazed with mischief.

“Make me Lex”

She challenged shifting further in the seat so that her feet were exposed to more of the dash. Directing a wink my way I felt my cheeks flush but she didn’t notice this, she was busy texting on her phone that she pulled out of her jean pocket.

“Oooooo!”

A chorus from Maddie and Jack erupted from the backseat, the last sound that hit my ears as I cut of the engine on reaching my drive.

&&

“Mom I’m home! I’m just getting changed and then I’m probably going to Jack’s so don’t bother with tea”

I slammed the door in a hurry and quickly chucked my bag down in the corner of the hallway. Quickly I ran up the stairs but froze halfway…silence. Normally my mom would have responded by now, it was then I noticed the sickly sweet aroma of cooking food wasn’t wafting out of the kitchen.

Turning half way on the stairs I ran back down and into the kitchen, everything was untouched and unused except for a sticky note tapped to the kitchen worktop. Peeling it off I saw my mom’s elegant handwriting underneath.

Gone out for the night with your father, it was a complete surprise. We’ll be back tomorrow lunch time love mom x

Shrugging my shoulders I crumpled the note in my palm before tossing it into the bin in the corner. Heading over to the fridge I pulled myself out a strawberry milkshake, twisting open the lid and allowing the contents to chill my insides.

BEEP.

Unlocking my phone my menu screen showed one new text message from Rian, curious as to what he was texting for I opened it up.

Rian; “Dude band practice at mine in 10, we need to get some songs perfect for Rival Schools”

SHIT. I completely forgot about Rival Schools it was near enough only 3 weeks away and we haven’t practiced together since before our spot at Rock Cave. Downing the rest of the pinky colored liquid I left it on the side before grabbing my house keys, locking up and then walking down the road to Rian’s house.

&&

“Hey Kathy”

I greeted as I walked through the Dawson household, we never knocked ever. We all knew everyone and we were all family to everyone, so it was natural to me.

“Hey Alex honey, they’re down in the basement as usual”

She grinned her perfectly white teeth shining through just like Rian. I turned the corner and opened the door to the basement before heading down the familiar wooden steps. In front of me I saw Jack “attempting” to tune his guitar, Rian behind his drums and Zack checking his bass – the usual basically.

“Jack you cannot tune for shit!”

A female voice spoke up causing me to gaze down at the cross legged blonde sitting on the floor leaning against the sofa. It was also only then did I notice Allie lying on the sofa, legs’ just about reaching the end as her attention was taken over by her iphone.

“ALEX BABY YOU’RE HERE!”

Jack dropped his guitar, his lanky figure tripping over the wires as he fought his way over to the bottom of the stairs placing a kiss on my cheek. I flipped him off.

“Fuck Jack what did I say about in public!”

I joked half heartedly at Jack pouting at me rejecting him, his fringe falling slightly out of place when he his head fell in shame.

“Sorry babe”

He winked rushing back over to his guitar struggling as he got caught up in the strap. Walking over to the mic stand I smiled at Allie who, upon my arrival had stopped doing whatever with her phone and looked up at me smiling back. As I navigated my way past Maddie I said hello to her too before ruffling her peroxide hair with my fingers.

“ALEXXXX WHYYYY!”

She whined like a child before neatening her dishelved layers with her fingers, using them as a sort of comb. Laughing at her facial expressions I shrugged my shoulders in response before adding

“God Maddie you’re just as bad as Jack sometimes”

She blushed furiously which confused me, had I missed something with her and Jack. They’ve been ok but something has been different ever since the night at the pool and the parking lot. Maddie simply starting biting on the cuff of her jacket while Jack tried to look busy with the guitar, something was up.

&&

I was half way through playing Circles, Allie actually could manage listening to it now. Maddie jumped up from her spot rushing over to pull Allie off the sofa. After a lot of complaining Allie gave in and starting swaying her hips to the beat.

Fuck. Biting down on my bottom lip in lust I tried to concentrate on something other than Allie. It didn’t work and I ended up missing an important chord.

“Alex what the fuck! Get a grip what is up”

“Sorry let’s go again”

I muttered as Allie and Maddie frowned at me, not used to me slipping me – that’s because I didn’t usually slip up. Zack sighed and stopped us all.

“I think we’re just exhausted let’s call it quits for tonight”

“Well I’m off to get food then I’m starving who is in?”

Jack asked addressing everyone. Maddie nodded along with Zack and Rian – I declined.

“Not me mom’s left me something”

Jack understood before turning on his heel to address Allie. She looked up her eyes covered by her fringe ever so as she shook her head side to side.

“No thanks I ate before”

“Your choice losers suck your dicks later!”

Tutting to myself Jack raced out the house followed by the others leaving just me and Allie alone in the basement, scratching the back of my neck nervously and shifting my feet side to side Allie gazed up at me.

“You alright Lex?”

“Urm yeah fine…do you want to come back to mine and watch some movies or something?”

I blurted out of nowhere, she had that effect on me and I didn’t know how to stop it. She bit down on her bottom lip gently – it was fucking cute – before nodding her head almost immediately.

“Let’s go!”

She smiled holding my hand in hers as we raced out of the Dawson household and 10 minutes down the road to mine. Once we got through my door I chucked my keys onto the table and walked into the kitchen to make some microwave popcorn while Allie picked the movie. Even though I knew what she was going to pick.

“Peter Pan!”

She exclaimed as I walked back through to the lounge carrying a bowl of popcorn laughing as my assumption was right. She fucking loved Peter Pan.

“How did I know you’d pick this?”

I added sarcastically placing the bowl on the coffee table and lying down on the sofa. Allie stuck her tongue out again, getting up from in front of the TV and running over to the sofa placing herself right next to me, her head resting peacefully against my chest.

&&

[To die would be an awfully big adventure

Expecting for Allie to continue quoting the rest of the movie I was shocked when she didn’t quote that. Shifting her in my hold I continued to keep my one arm placed on her hip. Looking down upon her I noticed she had fallen asleep, her breathing shallow and labored.

Admiring her beauty I began smiling to no-one but myself. I realized I had truly fallen head over heels in love with Allie but I didn’t have the guts to tell her. Running my fingers gently through her hair I tucked some loose stands behind her ear before tracing my thumb over her jaw. Suddenly I starting telling her how I felt, she couldn’t hear me...she was asleep, which meant I didn’t have to face getting rejected.

“I know you’re scared Allie, I guess that Rob fucked you up pretty bad. I know you’d never even consider being my girlfriend because well frankly I don’t deserve you. This Rob I know he has made you frightened to trust anyone again and I’ve seen that with the creep from the Rock Cave, but I’d never hurt you Allie. I just want to help you”

I whispered careful not to arouse her from her slumber. Slowly I lowered my other hand down to Allie’s waist as I brought her closer towards me, tighter. I just wanted to protect her.

“And when I complement you, you think I’m fucking around. I can understand why you think I would joke, but I’m not. When I say you look beautiful it’s because I mean it Allie. Fuck I even put on my best cologne just for you. I mean I’m Alex Gaskarth, according to the whole fucking town I was never and never will be a one woman man, but I would be…I would be for you. I can’t even explain the effect you have on me, like band practice. I have never fucked up once and then you just dance and I miss a chord!”

Raising my voice a little in annoyance with myself, a little bit, I froze instantly when Allie shifted in my arms snuggling closer to my body; her warm breath tickling my neck as her hand gently grasped my glamour kills shirt. My heart rate increased and decreased rapidly…I honestly thought she had heard everything then. Still I continued.

“There’s no point me telling you all this when you’re awake, it’s just as pointless me telling you now because I know you’re not ready. You’re not ready to trust me or be in a relationship but I get that. I get that because I know you probably don’t feel the same way I do, I don’t blame you my past isn’t exactly squeaky clean. I, I want you Allie but I know I can’t…I just, I just want you to know I think I’m in lo…”

Trying to stop my emotions getting the better of me I unwrapped my arms from around Allie as I trailed my index finger from her hand all the way to her collar bone and then back to her jaw line, my thumb softly grazing over her lips.

“Mhmmm”

Allie stirred yet again grabbing my shirt more tightly as she pressed up closer. She was waking up.

“Aleexx?”

Her voice was timid as she called out for me, squinting her eyes together tightly before rubbing them with her hands.

“I’m here”

I soothed as she fluttered her eyelids open, her deep brown eyes searching for my lighter ones, smiling to herself when she found what she was looking for.

“What time is it?”

She mumbled sleepily as she pushed herself up gently, her black layers sticking out messily – but in a sexy way. Checking my phone on the arm of the sofa I gave Allie her answer.

“Just gone half 11”

“SHIT I got to go home mum and dad are probably freaking out”

She scrambled off the sofa to get her stuff together pulling her mickey mouse jumper down slightly as it exposed her hips. Watching her frantically search for her phone there it was again, that sinking in the pit of my stomach when I knew she was leaving. I didn’t want her to leave.

“Ahh there is it. Right I’ll see you….”

“Stay here tonight?”

I cut her off, she froze in her spot looking at me her eyes wild.

“What about my parent’s, What about yours”

She stuttered clutching tighter on the iphone in the palm of her hand.

“There away until lunch tomorrow, please. Just text your parents”

I begged her; she in return eyed me suspiciously. She probably thought I had an ulterior motive to get her to bed. That’s what the old Alex would of done…not the new one.

And as if reading my thoughts she answered whilst texting

“Ok I’ll stay”

She grinned dropping her iphone back onto the coffee table and retaking her position on the sofa, in my arms.