Have No Fear

We were sitting at his bus again, he was trying to teach me dear god on the guitar, and I was doing pretty good. During most of our practices one of both of us got distracted and we would start making out but today for a change we didn’t.

I played the last note, a feeling of pride came over me as I realized that I finished the whole song without a mistake. I turned my head around to look at Brian.

She looked at me with a big smile, she had completed the song faultless and she looked so happy. “You’re so beautiful.” The expression on her face changed from happy to shocked, for a moment I didn’t understand why, until I realized that I had said my thought out loud.

I wanted to slap myself, I hadn’t meant to say that a loud. It had been very clear that this thing between us was just casual, no strings attached. But in the last week something had changed for me. At first I just met up with her, so that I could have sex but after a while they had started talking more, especially since he had been sick. After that he didn’t want to just hang out so that they could sleep together, no he wanted to learn more about her, he wanted to know every little thing.

She didn’t respond to my small outburst, I felt my chest tighten from panic. She would never wanted to see me again, why did I say that, I’m so stupid. My thoughts got a life of their own and I was about to get up and run of the bus. But I was stopped as I felt her lips against mine, they only touched each other lightly and I was thinking that maybe I just imagined it, but she pressed them together a little harder. The feeling in my chest went away and I snapped out of my thoughts, I moved a little closer to her.

The kiss was innocent and sweet nothing like we shared before. Too soon she broke it and our eyes met each others. Her eyes were filled with questions, but I didn’t know how to start answering them.

It stayed quiet until a soft voice filled the room. “I can’t do this anymore.” The constricting feeling came back again as she moved back, she moved from in between my legs to the seat next to me. “What?” I asked her in disbelieve. “I… ” She stuttered, she stood up from her seat and suddenly a flood of words left her mouth. “I really like you, and I know that it is stupid as you’re married, but I can’t help myself I’m just... I'm stupid.” She rambled and I let out a chuckle, I left my seat to stand across from her.

"You’re not stupid, you're an amazing girl, Kate." He said while we stood there, he with his hands on my waist, and mine on his shoulders. We waived slowly from left to right. "And I really like you." While saying those words he just looked at me with such love in his eyes. "I really like you too." I said back to him. He smiled happily from my words and leaned down to kiss me.

After that we just laid down on the couch together kissing and talking until I had to go back to my own bus for the ride to the next venue. That night I slept liked a baby.