Resistance Is Useless

CARSON

Jack sat on my bed and waited while I started to get ready in my closet for the huge party the guys were throwing at Zack’s house. His parents were going out for the night, and allowed him to have the house to himself. I don’t know why, but they were. I was happy, Jack and I needed this party. Things have been really tense between the two of us ever since he snapped at me. The tension didn’t just go away like I assumed that it would.
“You look good,” Jack commented when I walked out of my closet with a pair of heels in my hands.
“Thanks,” I smiled slightly at him before I sat on the edge of my bed. I slipped into my heels that matched the color of my sweater. I was nearly finished. I stood up from the bed, and put on my necklace before turning around to face Jack. He was staring at me intently. He looked slightly confused for a moment, but he didn’t say anything. “What are you thinking about?” I asked him.
Jack’s eyes snapped toward me.
“Huh?”
“I asked what you’re thinking about,” I repeated before I sat back down at the edge of my bed.
“Just some stuff. It really doesn’t matter,”
“It doesn’t look like it doesn’t matter,”
“Well it doesn’t.” He shrugged.
“Jack, what is it that you’re not telling me?” I questioned.
Like I said, he’s been acting really weird ever since he snapped at me. I really don’t understand what’s wrong, but something is making him act differently.
“Can we let it go, Carson?”
I nibbled on my lip.
“I suppose...”
“God fucking....ugh,” He groaned, rolling over on his back. He stared up at the ceiling. “This shouldn’t be this hard.”
“What shouldn’t?” I asked him, furrowing my brows.
“Nothing,” He muttered.
I rolled over so I had my hands on either side of his face, and I stared down at him. His brown eyes were searching mine for something. I couldn’t exactly tell what, but I knew that he was over-thinking...again.
“You can tell me,” I whispered.
“It’s nothing, Carson.” Jack insisted, placing his hands on my hips, and moving me away from him. My back hit my bed, and Jack sat up. He rubbed his hands over his face, and took a deep breath. I sat up, and placed my hand on his back. “Could you maybe not touch me?” I pulled back my hand sharply, and stared at him. Jack never looked at me, but he stood up. He offered his hand, and I took it. He pulled me up, and I was closer to his height. I went to kiss his lips, but he moved his head and I got his cheek. “Come on...we’re going to be late.”
I chewed on my lip as I watched him walk out of my bedroom. I shook my head, and walked after him. I felt the rejection oozing from every pour of my body. Jack didn’t want me to kiss him, Jack didn’t want me to touch him, and Jack didn’t want me to talk to him. Something is definitely wrong with this picture. I didn’t want to over-think it, but seriously...this is weird. He just got back from tour, he should want me to kiss him. I didn’t do anything out of the ordinary, did I? Do I smell bad or something?
“There they are,” Alex announced with Landon attached to his hand already. “Are you guys done getting ready?”
“Yeah...Cars was taking forever.” Jack playfully stated.
Landon rolled her eyes.
“If we’re late, I’m blaming you, Carson.”
“Kay,” I shrugged, not in the mood to talk to anyone. Landon eyed me for a moment while the guys started to talk about something. I had no idea what, I zoned out. It was so bad that I didn’t even notice that they had said something to me.
“Carson?” Alex waved his hand in front of me.
“Huh?”
“I just asked if it was okay if I sat up front with Alex,” Jack replied. “So, is it okay, Carson.”
They way he spat my name made my heart hurt and stomach churn.
“Do whatever the fuck you want, Jack. I don’t fucking care.” I spat back, sliding into the back seat with Landon soon following.
“What was that about?”
I shook my head, and didn’t answer. Alex got into the driver’s seat, and Jack slammed the door when he got in.
“I will do whatever the fuck I want to.”
“Good,” I replied.
“Fine,” Jack crossed his arms. “No need to be a bitch,”
“According to you, I’m always a bitch,”
“Damn straight you are.” He retorted. “It’s a wonder why we’re still together,”
“If you hate me so much, why don’t you just fucking dump me?” I asked. “Seriously, Jack. Grow the fuck up,”
“You’re the one telling me to grow up?!”
“GUYS!” Alex scolded. “Talk about this later. Don’t make this night about the two of you fighting. This is supposed to be a celebration. Dammit,”
“Fine,” I mumbled, crossing my arms.
Landon wrapped her arm around me for comfort. I took a deep breath and I laid my head on her shoulder. She was a good sister, no matter what anyone said to or about her.
The rest of the car ride was awkward, and Jack jumped out of the car before Alex even put it in park. The door slammed behind him, making me flinch.
“What’s going on?” Alex asked me.
“I honestly have no idea,” I admitted. “He’s been so...distant. He told me not to touch him when I was trying to comfort him, and then when I went to kiss him, he turned away. I don’t know what’s wrong with me to make him hate me so much,”
“He doesn’t hate you, I’m sure,” Landon stated.
“I’ll talk to him,” Alex added. “He’s my best friend. I can get something out of him, I’m sure.”
“Okay. Thanks, Lex.” I smiled.
“No problem,” Alex smiled in return. “Come on, let’s party,”

♥

I wasn’t having a good time. I was one-hundred percent sober, and I haven’t even touched a drink. I honestly didn’t feel like getting smashed like the others did. I haven’t talked to Jack, though I’ve been watching him. He has only had a drink so far, so he should only be tipsy, if that. I lost Landon and Alex a while ago when they snuck off with some drinks. They headed to an upstairs room so that they could make-out without being seen. They’re relationship is weird, but at least something isn’t wrong with theirs.
I made my way to the kitchen where some of my friends were handing out. Landon’s friends and my friends from back home were mingling with some of our new friends here. Kendra and Kara were talking to Vita and Chelsea while the guys were all talking to Zack, Rian, and Matt. The only person missing was Lilly, and Jack too but he didn’t count. I knew that he was in the living room talking to a bunch of people.
“Hey, Cars,” Kendra smiled once I got toward them. The girls and I all shared a quick hug before we started to talk again. “Where did Landon go?”
“She went somewhere with her boyfriend,” I replied, knowing that Vita and Chelsea had no idea about her and Alex.
“Awe, that’s cute,” Kendra smiled. “Where’s your beau?”
“Being a dick head,” I muttered underneath my breath.
“What did he do?” Vita asked me.
“He’s just...snappy, and distant.” I rolled my eyes. “But I don’t want to talk about him.”
“What about talking to him?” Chelsea asked. “Cause he’s coming this way, and he doesn’t look all that happy.”
I turned around and piered at him. Jack didn’t say anything to his friends who acknowledged him, but instead and grabbed my wrist.
“What are you doing?”
“We need to talk. Now,” He stated, dragging me out of the kitchen, and into a spare room that was downstairs. He shut the door, and turned around toward me. I felt a little uncomfortable.
“Jack...I...” I trailed off, not exactly knowing what to say. Jack rolled his eyes and pressed a rough kiss to my lips. I, of course, kissed him back. He started to move, forcing me backwards, and onto the bed. His kisses felt desperate, but I don’t understand why. He has barely drunk anything, so it definitely wasn’t the alcohol. “Jack, I love you,”
He pulled away and stared down at me. His breathing was a little irregular. He didn’t say anything back but he pressed his lips back down against mine. Clothes few everywhere across the room, and our bodies became one again. It was the first time in a long time that we had been like this with each other. It was incredible, but when it was all over, he didn’t cuddle with me. He didn’t whisper sweet words into my ear. He didn’t fall asleep with a smile on his face. Jack did none of those things. He simply stood up, and started to get dressed.
“Shit,” He hissed as he slipped on his shirt. He was fully dressed, and slipped back on his shoes.
“Jack?” I questioned. “What’s wrong, baby?”
“Don’t call me that, Carson.” He snapped again.
“What are you doing?” I asked him as he tossed me my clothes. I started to get dressed again while Jack refused to even look at me. It made my stomach churn again. “Jack, will you please just tell me what’s going on? Please stop pushing me away,”
“Carson...I...” He trailed off, and then he turned around to look at me. That same expression he wore right before he pushed me off of him earlier was on his face again. “Dammit,” he swore before he unlocked the door. “I shouldn’t have done this.”
“Done what? Have sex with me?”
“Yes,”
“Why? We’re together and we’re in love.” I answered. “Nothing should be wrong.”
Jack shook his head and almost laughed.
“Carson, I want to break up with you,”
“W-what?” I choked.
Did he seriously just say that?
“That’s what I’ve been thinking about lately. That’s what I was going to say to you earlier. I can’t do this anymore,” He stated before he turned around and walked out of the room. I scrambled to get back on my heels before I was chasing him out of the room.
“What the fuck is wrong with you?!” I shouted at him, earning some stares. “’You seriously just fucked me and then leave?!”
“It’s not like that,” He stated, turning around to face me. “I’m just not feeling us anymore...”
“Seriously, Jack?! That’s the best you could come up with? That you’re not ‘feeling’ us anymore?”
“Yeah, well...I don’t think you want the truth.”
“The truth would sure as hell be a whole lot easier than this,” I spat back, feeling the tears build up. “What happened to us?”
“Nothing happened, Carson.” Jack replied. “I cheated.”
“You did what?!”
“I cheated on you, Carson. I cheated on you while I was on tour. I cheated on you with more than one girl..and a few guys.”
“Why would you do that to me?”
“Because I’m not good enough for you,” He yelled back. “I will never be good enough for you! I’m just a fucking guitarist that didn’t go to college, and that’s in some punk band. I have tight jeans and dyed hair! I’m bisexual, and rude. I’m a guy that’s definitely not good enough for the fucking President’s daughter, okay? You’re friends and father will never approve of me, Carson! This just isn’t going to work out between us,”
I felt my tears sliding down my face.
“Then why in the hell did you try so hard in the first place?” I nearly whispered. Jack stepped forward to whip my tears, a reaction, I suppose. I slapped his hand away, and he huffed. “I love you, Jack. You fucking idiot. I don’t give a damn about what they would think about you,”
“You say that now, but I know you, Carson. You will always care about what other people think about you! You’re a spoiled brat that always gets what she wants,”
“It’s better than being a liar and a cheater. At least I have enough respect for people not to lie in their fucking faces.”
“Don’t play that game with me,”
“Why not? You seem to be playing the same thing with me.” I yelled back. “You’re pathetic, Jack.” I said, still staring at him.
“I just wanted to get into your pants, Carson. Don’t flatter yourself.” He said before he turned around and got lost in the crowd of people. I started to cry harder, and felt a pair of arms that I knew belong to Landon wrap around me.
“Shh,” She soothed.
“Take her to the car, I’ll be right there,” Alex stated as he handed over Landon the keys. Together we walked to Alex’s car, and slid back into the back seat. It wasn’t even midnight and we were already leaving.
“I-I’m sorry for the buzz kill,” I sobbed.
“You’re more important, Carson,” My twin sister stated, hugging me tighter. It wasn’t even ten minutes later that Alex slammed the car door closed and started to drive off.
“Are you okay, Carson?” Alex asked out loud. “Never mind, of course you aren’t. I can’t believe he said that to you,”
“Me either,” I whispered back. I felt like shit, and I didn’t know what else to do. Alex pulled into our garage, and Landon slowly took me up the stairs to avoid Peter and our mom, which was a waste anyway. The two were fighting when we got home, and Alex decided to intervene. I don’t know why, but he joined in the yelling match while Landon took care of me. We laid in my bed together while I cried.
“Jack’s going to so get it.” Landon muttered before holding me closer.
I just cried into my twin’s shoulder.