I Want to Love and Back

We were heading to Oklahoma.
I was drawing quietly in a corner when I felt familiar arms around my waist.

“What are you doing?” Cam asked and rested his head on my shoulder. I wasn’t really expecting things to be like this between me and Cam. I was still waiting for that moment where he leaves me broken again. But I felt happy to be in his arms…for now, although, I’m still scared to lose him. And this time, even as a best friend.

“Nothing.” I grinned.

“Mmm-hmm. Do you want to have lunch with me when the bus stops?” he asked confidently.

“Is this Cameron Hurley trying to ask me out on a date?” I gasped and pretended to be shocked.

“Do you want to or not?” he groaned. I chuckled and said, “Ooh, a demanding one.”

He rolled his eyes at me and kissed my cheek, waiting for an answer. “We’ll see.” I smirked.

“What? C’mon Sydney! Don’t do that.” He whined. I laughed and kissed him softly.

“I’ll take that as a yes.” He smiled and unwrapped his arms around me.

“Maybe.” I teased.

“What?” he groaned.

“Kidding.” I flashed a smile.

“Whatever, I know you want me anyway.” He laughed and headed to talk to Garrett.

After several minutes of unsuccessful drawings, I decided to take a nap. The bus won’t be stopping in about three hours or so. As I headed to mine and Erin’s bunk, I met a pair of tired green eyes.
“Sydney.” John greeted blankly. His hair was tousled and he looked like he was hungover from last night. “John. Sleep well?” I retorted.

“Yeah. You?”

“Just about to.”

“Alright.” And with that he walked away. How in the world can I fix this with him? Ugh.
~*~

I was sleeping dreamlessly until I felt someone embrace me with arms I’d know anywhere in the world.

“Syd, c’mon. The bus’ll stop in a few minutes. Cam whispered. I groaned and hid my face on the crook of his neck. He chuckled and ran his hands through my hair. “We’re having lunch remember?” he added. I can hear the smile in his voice.

“Noooooo.” I groaned into his neck. He laughed and kissed my forehead. And then my cheek, and then the corner of my mouth and brushed his lips down to my neck. He repeated the circuit several times.

Dear God. I think I’m gonna die. “ALRIGHT, I’M UP.” I said nervously.

“Good. Now, chop! Chop!” he patted my butt. I chuckled and climbed down the bunk.

I put on my black jeans and a The Maine baseball tee. I chuckled as I realized I was already on tour with them. I slid my feet into my Toms and pulled my red hair into a ponytail. I headed to the “social room” where everyone practically hung out everyday.

“WOW” Pat exclaimed as he registered what I was wearing. I laughed.

“I had this shirt since forever.” I said.

“A loyal fan, eh?” Garrett teased. John smiled and added “She’s a fangirl. She has to be loyal.” He laughed. I only smiled at him.

“Where are you going, anyway?” Peter asked curiously.

“Probably going to hook up with Cameron or something.” Kennedy laughed. I saw John frown from the corner.

“Whatever Kenny. Have you seen him?” I asked.

“Uhh, I think he’s getting dressed or something.” He replied, focused on the television.

“Oh.” I said and sat between him and Erin.

“Cock-block.” Jared chuckled.

“You gotta love me right?” I replied and laughed at Kenny and E who were red as tomatoes.

“Let’s go?” Cam walked in after a few moments of watching Phineas & Ferb.

“Finally.” I rolled my eyes at him. I stood up and walked towards him. He grabbed my waist and we went outside.

“Where do you want to have lunch?” he asked and intertwined our fingers.

“Hmmm, I thought you set it up, Mr. Dateman.” I chuckled. After many moments of teasing we decided to
have lunch at McDonald’s.

“I feel disappointed.” Cam muttered as we sat down with our orders.

“W-why?” I asked nervously.

“I wanted to take you somewhere fancy and we’re in McDonald’s.” he groaned.

“Aww, I’m actually okay with McDonald’s. I like it better than some fancy restaurant.” I chuckled.

“One of the reasons why I love you.” Cam smiled shyly. I caught my breath and almost choked on my burger. Did he just say he loved me? Why? How? Why now? Only now? How long? I narrowed my eyes because I was close to dying with a huge piece of burger in my mouth. I coughed and drank coke. Cam looked at me confusingly. I just shook my head and smiled. We talked more about tour and life and how we’ve been. But I can never get the line out of my head. One of the reasons why I love you. I. Love. You. Love.

As we walked back to the bus hand-in-hand, I continued to be confused. Why now?

“Cameron. Cam. Stop for a minute.” I stopped walking in front of the bus.

“What’s wrong, babe?” he raised his eyebrows.

“Why now? I don’t get it.” I asked, not meeting his eyes.

“Sydney, look at me.” He lifted my chin with his fingers. I looked into those brown pools.

“I want to give this a try, okay? I want to give us a try. I never knew I can. But now, you’re what matters to me the most.” He said seriously kissed my forehead. I smiled and hugged him.

Maybe this will work out after all... or will it?
~¤~

When we got back to the bus, I was smiling like crazy and I can’t seem to stop. I sat down on the chair by the kitchen area.

“Any drugs?” Garrett asked teasingly.

“Oh hey, Garrett.” I laughed.

“How’d it go?”

“Eh.” I teased.

“Eh? SPILL.” He begged. I hesitated.

“I-I think this is it. I think I finally have him, Gar. He told me he loved me. Sort of, and he told me he wanted to give it a try…” I sighed.

“Mmhmm. Well, that’s great and all, Syd. I’m happy for you. But…”

“But…” I groaned.

“Watch out. You might break again.” He smiled. I smiled back. He knew me so well, I don’t even question it. It’s official, Garrett is one of the best people in the world.

“Thank you, Garrett. I’m sure you’ll be there when I do.” I hugged him.

“Of course.” He hugged me back. “You have to fix things with John too.” He added.

“I know.” I sighed. “How?”

“Well, you can talk like real adults. Or you can just wrestle like four year olds, like we do.” He suggested.

“I think I’ll just talk to him.” I laughed.

I just hope he listens...