The Only Hope for Me Is You

I heard Frank and Gerard arguing, yelling at each other. I sat there on the couch, hearing literally everything that came out of their mouths.

“You fucking cheat!” I heard Gerard yell. “What the fuck are you trying to do, man. Cy is MINE. She belongs to ME. What are you thinking?”

“Gerard, no, I—“

“No, Frank, you know you were in the wrong, and you always are. Always will be. So back the fuck off, and let us be together.”

“Gerard…”

“No, don’t fucking talk to me.” It was silent for a minute, then Frank spoke again.

“We have to settle this, and the only way we can do that is to bring Cy into this.” I didn’t hear Gerard respond, so I guess he nodded. I face planted into the couch, blaming myself for everything. I thought about the fact that if Frank hadn’t saved my life, I would have never affected anything about them. They would be best friends still, and would not hate each other.

But then I thought about it from a different perspective; if Frank HADN’T saved me, Gerard would be without a best friend and a lover, and who knows what he would be feeling if I wasn’t here, right now. I wiped my eyes from my tears, looked up, and saw Frank and Gerard walking down the hall towards me, Gerard looking beyond pissed off, and Frank looking slightly sad, but scared as well. I sat up on the couch, and Frank waved slightly at me, smiling, but I didn’t smile back. They sat on either side of me, and I hated this. I was in the middle, literally and figuratively. Shit.

“Guys….” I said, looking at the black tv. “What the fuck do we do about this?”

“We fucking sort it out,” Gerard said. “That’s the only option.” I saw Frank nod, and I hung my head.

“Look…you guys should not be mad at each other, okay?” I looked from Frank on my left, to Gerard on my right, and wrapped one arm around each of theirs. “I was in the wrong, just me.” I looked at Gerard.

“Babe, don’t be mad at Frank, okay? He did nothing wrong. It was me who acted like a child, like a fucking whore, and I’m sorry, babe.” The tears started again. “Really, Gee…I am. I feel like a fucking bitch. I cheated on you, with your best friend of all people, and that was WRONG.” He cocked his head, biting his lip but not responding to my apology. I understood why, though, and nodded, turning to Frank.

“And Frankie…” I said, and he smiled that smile of his. “I wasn’t thinking straight…when you kissed me this morning, though, you set something off, and I got confused. Like, super confused.” His smile faded, and he just blinked at me. “

You fucked up my head, Frank. That’s why this all happened.” I looked back at Gerard.

“Babe, trust me, I LOVE YOU.” He looked at me, still furious, but his eyes lightened up slightly. “Gee…I was so confused, I---I don’t know why I did it…” I hung my head again, and felt Gerard pat my back lightly.

“Babe…why, though?” he asked, and I chuckled.

“I—I honestly don’t know…” I said, looking at his face, which was a lot less angry, and more sad now. My apology got through to him, and this made me feel a little better.

“So how are we gonna do this?” I heard Frank say, and turn to him.

“What?”

“You know…” he said, and I shook my head, not understanding.

“Cy, you have to choose….” Gerard said, and I turned back to him.

“The fuck you say?” I asked, shocked. Was he really serious right now?

“I said you have to decide,” he said, moving my bangs out of my eyes. “Me or him. And sooner would be better…” he added, looking at Frank, who nodded in agreement. I shoved myself off of Gerard’s lap and stood up, facing them.

“You guys….you want me to choose. Right now. On the spot.” I just glared at the both of them.

“Well…yeah…” Frank said slowly, and Gerard nodded.

“Babe, come on, it’s not that hard of a choice…” Frank glared at him.

“Fuck you, man,” he said, and Gerard flicked his hair out of his eyes, and ran his hand through his red hair.

“Did YOU have sex last night, Frank. Um, no.”

“Oh, aren’t you the sassy one!” Frank retorted, and I groaned.

“OKAY! GERARD!” I yelled, throwing my hands up. “That has NOTHING to do with the topic at hand!” I bit my lip, knowing that was a lie. That’s all this was about.

“I have to think about everything.” I said, walking out the front door, feeling the desert heat on my skin, and automatically I started sweating. I walked a little down the road, and found a giant rock, lodged deep into the ground. Sighing, I sat myself on the rock, ray gun in hand, just in case something was to happen, and got myself lost in my head like I did every time I was stressed out.

The more I thought about it, I realized my relationship with Gerard was strictly sexual. It wasn’t love; I made the mistake of thinking it was, due to the fact I never went that far with anyone before. We met three days ago, made out the second day we knew each other, and had sex on the third. I hardly knew him, to be honest. When I met him the first time, when I didn’t know it was him, so long ago in that art supply store…he was so different now then he was before. On the other hand, though, we DID have a similar past, actually knowing each other for so long and not knowing it. I guess that was the only positive variable in this whole situation. I picked at the straggling grass on the edge of the rock, thinking even harder about Frank.

I didn’t have a past with him; but we had a different story all together. He literally saved my life, and I still had to find a way to thank him for that. With Frank, I could tell our relationship was much more romantic and loving than I was with Gerard. I didn’t feel the urge to jump his bones on every moment we were alone together; I just wanted to cuddle with his cute little tattooed body all night long, kissing softly in the darkness, watching old slasher movies and reading comic books in his arms. No sex…not yet, anyways. With Frank, I could see that we would last a really long time before taking it to the bedroom. He was too kind and respectful to force me into that, but then again, so was Gerard.

Gerard always asked if I was okay when we had sex…I didn’t realize that before, but now I did. He cared about me, would die for me, do anything to make me happy. When we kissed, I had felt something special between us, something I never felt before. And I liked it when I discovered that fire. I wondered if it was still there, deep down inside me, being blocked by my feelings for Frank, who also cared about me as much as Gerard did.

“WHY do you both have to be so fucking perfect…” I asked myself, putting my bandana on my mouth, feeling woozy from the drugged air. I shook my head, realizing this was the hardest fucking decision I would have to make in my entire life…either way I went, I would end up destroying something perfect. I didn’t want to destroy anything I had between either of them, so I suddenly had the wildest, craziest idea about how to solve this problem; I didn’t know if the drugged up air was getting to me, but I had a plan. I smirked, and stood back up and started walking back down the road to the shack, thinking if this was actually going to work.
“You wanna do WHAT?” Frank asked, shocked, yet still grinning. I nodded.

“It’s the only way, man,” I said, my hands on my hips.

“Um, no.” Gerard shook his head. “This is fucking stupid, Cy. You are crazy.” I leaned down on my knees and grabbed both of his hands in mine.

“Come on, babe! It’s the only way nothing will get ruined!”

“Nah, just my pride and manhood.” He said, and I scoffed.

“Frank, help me out here,” I said, looking at him. He winked, and leaned on Gerard.

“Buddy…come on…it’s not like we haven’t before, you know…” Gerard put his hand up to Frank’s face, shaking his head.

“Frank, that was a different time, when we were so different…it doesn’t apply now, man.” Frank rolled his eyes.

“The situation calls for it, Gerard.” I nodded, looking at Gerard hopefully, who bit his lip, thinking.

“Gee…come on, babe…please?” I asked, and he looked at me, blinked, then nodded his head, slowly.

“Ugh, fine…” he said finally, and I leaped onto his lap, beginning the entire plan. He didn’t seem to be into it at first, but after a minute or two, he finally started kissing back, wrapping his arms around my waist, pulling me closer, his tongue exploring my mouth. I smiled, realizing the fire was back, and the plan was working like a charm. He bit my lip, making me moan and open my mouth more, his tongue still moving around wildly, wrapping and sliding against mine. After a few more minutes of this, I released, looking at him and grinned., and turned to Frank.

“You ready?” I asked him, and he nodded.

“Come here, babe,” he said, holding his arms out towards me to jump in, and I nodded, crawling off of the depressed looking Gerard and onto Frank’s small frame, my arms on his shoulders and his on my back. His kiss was much less aggressive than Gerard’s and I honestly liked it better. Gerard had turned it into a competition in his mind, and it showed. Frank didn’t really care about winning, he just wanted to have fun tonight, like I did. His tongue wasn’t crazy like Gerard’s; I had to sort of force him to start using it, and when he did, it was gentle. It wasn’t constantly down my throat, just grazing my tongue every once in a while, rubbing against my teeth. I moved my hands up to be behind his head, and tugged his hair, and he groaned in pleasure, pushing me backwards and knocking into Gerard. I felt Gerard flinch on the couch, and I took my mouth off of Frank’s, turning to him again.

“Gee?”

“Yeah, I can’t do this.” He said, standing up. “You two have fun, you really deserve each other…” He frowned, turned around and left the living room, to go back into his room. I still had me hands wrapped around Frank’s neck, but I felt bad about everything. I put my forehead on Frank’s chest, sighing.

“I really should go talk to him…” I said. “This was a fail.” Frank lifted my head with his hand, and kissed me lightly on the lips before talking.

“I’ll go with you,” he said, and I nodded, hopping off his lap and following him to Gerard’s room. Gerard was lying on his bed, staring at the ceiling, and turned his head when I knocked on the door, holding hands with Frank.

“God, what?” he asked, sitting up.

“We had a deal, Gerard…” I said, letting go of Frank’s hand and sitting on Gerard’s lap, kissing him hard on the mouth. “Remember?”

“Ugh, but why this?” He said, rolling his eyes. “If anything it’s making me feel worse.” I sighed, and looked at Gerard in a loving way, and it made him smile.

“Babe…come on,” I kissed him again. “For me? Please?” He groaned, and nodded, kissing me back, and there was the fire again. He lightly rolled me over, onto my back, sliding his hands under my shirt, cupping my breasts; I moaned, kissing him back hard, and reached around him to take his shirt off, feeling his body crush mine. He moved down from my lips to my neck, and as he did this, I motioned Frank to walk over, and he did, and sat on the bed next to me and Gerard, waiting.

“Babe,” I said, and Gerard stopped, nodding, knowing what I meant. He needed a breather anyways, the pace he was going. I sat up, looked at Frank, and he leaned forward, connecting his lips to mine, gently, and I felt a shiver go through my spine. I leaned into Frank even more, putting myself on top of him, my hands on the back of his head, straddling him. I saw him smirk, and I smirked back, and continued to explore around in his mouth, moving my hands down from his neck to his back, studying his small frame. He wrapped his arms around my back, pulling me closer, and rolled us over until he was on top, thrusting in a rhythm.

“Oh, fuck,” I moaned, feeling it. He was a lot gentler than Gerard, but still…it felt amazing. He crushed his body into mine, and leaned up to take off his vest and shirt, and I looked up, noticing his tattoos continued onto his chest and stomach, and I traced the birds on his hips with my finger until Gerard tapped him, and Frank nodded, and they switched places.

Gerard started up again right away, making the bed creak even louder than before, panting and groaning as out hips ground together in even beats. He reached under my shirt, taking it off and throwing it behind him. I looked up, watching it fly behind him, landing right on top of Frank’s head, who laughed uncontrollably at this from under the fabric. I giggled, watching him take it off his head, and he stood up, unbuckling his belt and taking his boots off before his pants. I concentrated back on Gerard, and felt him through his pants, and I tapped him.

“Babe, babe…you have pants on still…” He stopped and looked down, then back at me, winking. He got up off of me, and I took a quick breather before Frank took over, and I saw his boxers read “Banananananana Republic” I laughed at this, remembering a song I heard not too long ago, and let him fall on top of me, thrusting, his mouth open in an orgasm face, groaning. I groaned as well, feeling everything through his boxers on my thigh. This had to be the craziest thing I had ever done in my entire life, and I liked it; I had a feeling they did as well.
I was between both of them on the bed, and all of us were completely naked, and I was exhausted. But the others wanted to keep going. We were all sweating a ridiculous amount, half from the heat, and half from the amount of sex we just had.

“Oh my fuck, you guys,” I said, amazed. “You are fucking rabbits.” Frank ran a finger between my breasts, smiling. It tickled, and it made me giggle.

“Come on, babe…” He said, and I turned to kiss his lips hard, then shook my head.

“I’m so fucking exhausted, guys…” I admitted. And not to mention sore as fuck. Gerard turned to face me, nuzzling his nose on mine.

“Cy…” he said. “I understand if you want a break,” he kissed my open mouth, and I put my hand on the side of his head.

“Thanks, Gee,” I said, and sat up against the headboard of the bed, stretching my arms.

“I don’t blame you for being exhausted though, babe,” Frank said. “You took all of that like a fucking pro.”

“Thanks.” I said, and crawled over Gerard to stand up and stretch. I looked at the multiple condom wrappers on the floor, bending down and laughing at myself as I picked one up.

“Thank god we found these.” I said, giggling at the fucking stupid BL/ind logo smiling at me from the package as if to say “CONGRATS AT GETTING FUCKED BY YOUR TWO BEST FRIENDS!” I dropped the wrapper and took one of the blankets from the floor that had fallen off the bed and wrapped it around me. Looking at the two of them, I smirked.

“If you two still wanna, though,” I said, “I don’t mind.” I saw Frank raise his eyebrows at Gerard.

“Just like old times!” He joked. Gerard laughed too.

“Well I’m getting tired, but whatever…nothing too serious though, okay?” He said, and leaned over to kiss Frank on the mouth, and Frank didn’t even fight it. I sat there, watching the two of them roll around on the bed, kissing each other deeply, arms wrapped around each other, wondering how many times this happened before I showed up. Their friendship was definitely unique, and I had just saved it with my genius-yet-completey-insane idea I had came up with tonight. Thank God it worked, or I don’t have any idea what I would have done to save it. I just hoped Kobra and Joker had no idea what just went on in here. She’d hate me for this. And so would Mikey. I looked over at the bed, and saw Gerard on top, thrusting.

“Guys…we should stop now….” I said. “Before the others find out, you know…?” I bit my lip, and Gerard rolled off Frank, who was giggling.

“Fuck, I forgot about how this feels…” he said. “Wow.”

“Never again, though, okay?” Gerard asked. “Fucking shit, if they found out about this…”

“I know babe,” I said, looking at the closed door. “What are they gonna say…?” Frank giggled again.

“Fuck, who cares?” he said. “We had fun, right?”

“Fuck yeah we did!” I exclaimed, and Gerard nodded.

“Honestly, it was better than I thought it was gonna be.” He said. Frank put his hands on his face and leaned up on the headboard of the bed.

“Cy, can you get the cigs from my vest pocket?” He asked, and I nodded, getting up and digging through his vest pocket, taking out the box and the lighter. I took out one cigarette for all three of us and crawled back on the bed, snuggling in between them, and handed them the cigarettes, and put one in my mouth. I lit them all, and smiled at both of them.

“So are we all good now, guys?”

“I think we are.” Frank said, letting out a stream of smoke. Gerard nodded.

“I love you babe,” he said. Frank interrupted me just as I was about to say it back to Gerard.

“I love you too, babe,” he said, grinning.