Status: This fanfic is completed. I highly doubt that there will be a sequel.
Stand A Little Too Tall, Say A Little Too Much
Part 7.
I didn’t know what to say at all. I didn't know Josh very well but he seemed to be willing to talk to anyone who wanted to listen.
“Josh, why don’t you come in? It’s getting cold.” I started shivering violently. I hated the cold.
He didn’t say anything but I motioned him towards my front door.
“Come on, Josh.”
I unlocked the front door and Josh walked in and headed straight for the kitchen dining chairs. He sat down and his face didn’t have any emotion contained in it at all. I saw my mum move to the living room door and I stopped her before she could see what a state Josh was in.
“Just don’t ask, I’ll explain later. Stay in the living room.” I whispered in her ears.
She nodded and shut the living room door.
I walked over to the kitchen table and sat beside Josh. I put my arm on his shoulder and rubbed my hand up and down his back in a comforting motion. His face welled up with tears again.
“Josh, hey. Come on, lovely. Let’s get you some tissues.” I felt as if I was treating him like a kid. I’d never been in this situation before so I was speechless and didn’t have a clue what to say. I grabbed his hand and took him to the bathroom. I got a few tissues from the Kleenex box and dabbed at the tears streaming from his face. My heart tightened a little. I couldn’t bear to see Josh cry.
I didn’t want to disturb Mum so I went into my room and beckoned Josh to follow. Josh walked just above snail pace into my room and once he was clear of the door I shut it quietly. I closed the window, drew the pretty chocolate coloured curtains and sat on my double bed. I patted the space next to me and eventually Josh lay down but immediately stared at the ceiling. I got under my bed covers and lay in a half-lie, half sat position. I stroked his hair and played with it gently through my fingers.
“What happened?”
He carried on staring at the ceiling, his eyes not budging from their fixed position at all.
“Josh? You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, but I don’t think its best if you keep it all bottling up. You’ll only feel worse.” I tried to sympathise with him. Reluctantly, he responded.
“It all went b-by, so f-fast,” he stuttered, “one minute w-we were talking about the television and t-the next she was on the f-f-floor.”
“What did you do after that?”
“I-I jumped up and went over to her. I-I checked her pulse but there was nothing. I was so s-scared. I thought she might have been… d-d-dead.” he managed to force out the last few words between each stream of tears. Every time tears came out of his eyes and down onto his face, I felt my heart tighten. What made it worse was that I could see the pain on his face and it looked as if his heart was locking up bit by bit too.
“Did you call an ambulance after that?”
“Yes. I didn’t know w-what else to d-do. I called an a-ambulance and they came s-s-straight away.”
“She’ll be okay, Josh. She’s a fighter Josh. Remember that. She always has been a fighter. I’m sure she doesn’t want her Josh to be left in a state like this.”
“Are you s-sure? I keep thinking all these n-negative stuff that could h-happen.”
“Don’t do that, Josh. Think of positive things. Never ever think of negative stuff in this situation because Mum used to tell me if you think negatively, it will happen and most of the time it did so I stopped and it’s kind of worked. Think positive, remember. Positive Josh, okay?”
“I’ll t-t-try.”
We lay there for a few hours more and we’d shifted a bit closer towards each other. I asked more questions occasionally and he’d eventually answer but they weren’t big detailed replies.
His tears had stopped now and he hadn’t cried for about half an hour. I positioned myself so that I had my back on the headboard and my legs pointing down towards the bottom of the bed like an L shape. I looked down at Josh and this time he looked back at me and edged a smile. I smiled back. I was so glad to see that he’d perked up a little. He poised himself so he was lying at the same position as me and then he laid his head sideways towards me on the headboard. He took my hand with his left, placed it over his right and cuffed it over so that we’d locked hands together.
He stared into my eyes and I looked back into his. He smiled and I smiled back. Its like we were mirrored as I copied his every move. He moved his free hand towards my face and shut my eyelids. I didn’t know what to do and I didn’t know what he was going to do either. I could feel that he’d moved closer and I was starting to feel awkward. I heard him breathing heavily and then suddenly I felt something press onto my lips. I opened my eyes and saw Josh’s eyes closed and his mouth on mine. I panicked and pushed him off me. He looked at me bewildered and his facial expression phased into a confused face.
“Josh, what are you doing?!” were the first words that came tumbling out of my mouth.
“Josh, why don’t you come in? It’s getting cold.” I started shivering violently. I hated the cold.
He didn’t say anything but I motioned him towards my front door.
“Come on, Josh.”
I unlocked the front door and Josh walked in and headed straight for the kitchen dining chairs. He sat down and his face didn’t have any emotion contained in it at all. I saw my mum move to the living room door and I stopped her before she could see what a state Josh was in.
“Just don’t ask, I’ll explain later. Stay in the living room.” I whispered in her ears.
She nodded and shut the living room door.
I walked over to the kitchen table and sat beside Josh. I put my arm on his shoulder and rubbed my hand up and down his back in a comforting motion. His face welled up with tears again.
“Josh, hey. Come on, lovely. Let’s get you some tissues.” I felt as if I was treating him like a kid. I’d never been in this situation before so I was speechless and didn’t have a clue what to say. I grabbed his hand and took him to the bathroom. I got a few tissues from the Kleenex box and dabbed at the tears streaming from his face. My heart tightened a little. I couldn’t bear to see Josh cry.
I didn’t want to disturb Mum so I went into my room and beckoned Josh to follow. Josh walked just above snail pace into my room and once he was clear of the door I shut it quietly. I closed the window, drew the pretty chocolate coloured curtains and sat on my double bed. I patted the space next to me and eventually Josh lay down but immediately stared at the ceiling. I got under my bed covers and lay in a half-lie, half sat position. I stroked his hair and played with it gently through my fingers.
“What happened?”
He carried on staring at the ceiling, his eyes not budging from their fixed position at all.
“Josh? You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to, but I don’t think its best if you keep it all bottling up. You’ll only feel worse.” I tried to sympathise with him. Reluctantly, he responded.
“It all went b-by, so f-fast,” he stuttered, “one minute w-we were talking about the television and t-the next she was on the f-f-floor.”
“What did you do after that?”
“I-I jumped up and went over to her. I-I checked her pulse but there was nothing. I was so s-scared. I thought she might have been… d-d-dead.” he managed to force out the last few words between each stream of tears. Every time tears came out of his eyes and down onto his face, I felt my heart tighten. What made it worse was that I could see the pain on his face and it looked as if his heart was locking up bit by bit too.
“Did you call an ambulance after that?”
“Yes. I didn’t know w-what else to d-do. I called an a-ambulance and they came s-s-straight away.”
“She’ll be okay, Josh. She’s a fighter Josh. Remember that. She always has been a fighter. I’m sure she doesn’t want her Josh to be left in a state like this.”
“Are you s-sure? I keep thinking all these n-negative stuff that could h-happen.”
“Don’t do that, Josh. Think of positive things. Never ever think of negative stuff in this situation because Mum used to tell me if you think negatively, it will happen and most of the time it did so I stopped and it’s kind of worked. Think positive, remember. Positive Josh, okay?”
“I’ll t-t-try.”
We lay there for a few hours more and we’d shifted a bit closer towards each other. I asked more questions occasionally and he’d eventually answer but they weren’t big detailed replies.
His tears had stopped now and he hadn’t cried for about half an hour. I positioned myself so that I had my back on the headboard and my legs pointing down towards the bottom of the bed like an L shape. I looked down at Josh and this time he looked back at me and edged a smile. I smiled back. I was so glad to see that he’d perked up a little. He poised himself so he was lying at the same position as me and then he laid his head sideways towards me on the headboard. He took my hand with his left, placed it over his right and cuffed it over so that we’d locked hands together.
He stared into my eyes and I looked back into his. He smiled and I smiled back. Its like we were mirrored as I copied his every move. He moved his free hand towards my face and shut my eyelids. I didn’t know what to do and I didn’t know what he was going to do either. I could feel that he’d moved closer and I was starting to feel awkward. I heard him breathing heavily and then suddenly I felt something press onto my lips. I opened my eyes and saw Josh’s eyes closed and his mouth on mine. I panicked and pushed him off me. He looked at me bewildered and his facial expression phased into a confused face.
“Josh, what are you doing?!” were the first words that came tumbling out of my mouth.