Set Fire to Rain

The night was cold and dark. I watched as the curtains danced in the night breeze, the moon shining through the open window and casting a silver glow on the ground. It was freezing in my room, and no amount of fire crackling in the hearth or the blankets piled on top of me, I could not find a warm spot in the room, nor could I stop shivering, whether it was from the cold or anticipation of Draco’s return.
I had been trying not to doze off for hours, knowing I had to be awake when he arrived. The day had been quiet and cold without anyone in the house. Even Narcissa seemed nervous and standoffish. She may be playing the part of a mother who supports her son’s villainy, but she was no happier than I was.
It was past midnight when I heard the sound of the manor gates opening. Far away, conversation could be heard as well. Without hesitating I threw my blankets off and scrambled to the wardrobe, pulling pants and a shirt on. Voice could be heard down stairs by the time I had finished and slipped through my door.
“Oh Lucius,” Narcissa’s voice carried up the stairs, very near tears.
I jogged down the steps and followed the conversation into the library. Draco and his parents stood talking quietly and turned when I came in. Lucius had aged in Azkaban, it seemed. His hair was pale and thin, his face pulled tight against his cheekbones. He did not look pleased or upset at my arrival. Draco walked over to me quickly and embraced me, pressing his face in my hair. I had to fight the tears that sprung to my eyes.
“It’s good to have you home, Mr. Malfoy,” I said when Draco pulled away. “The house was quite empty without your presence.” This of course, was a lie, but I felt that it needed to be said.
He smiled as best as he could at me, which still wasn’t great. “Thank you, Miss Potter.”
“Are you okay?” I asked the moment his parents turned around. I brushed his face with my fingers, moving his hair out of his eyes. “I was worried sick when you weren’t here.”
“I’m fine, love. Are you okay? You look… broken.”
A tear escaped my eye but he brushed it away with his thumb lightly. “I thought I had made a mistake,” I whispered. “I… I shouldn’t have gone. I just. I don’t know what to do anymore Draco. You know he has to be stopped… we can’t live like this, and the only way to fix that is Him. I had to help.”
Draco’s face went dark. “I understand that. But at what cost?”
“I don’t know,” I breathed.
“Well then,” Narcissa said finally, sighing with delight. “Now that we’re all here, I should daresay Merry Christmas.”
My eyes widened in shock. It was Christmas? I had absolutely no idea that it had been Christmas day, and slowly guilt crept into my heart that I had said nothing to Narcissa about it all day or night. When you’re being driven mad with sorrow and rage, time was nothing and cared nothing for you, always moving to it’s own pace.
“I have a gift for you,” Draco murmured, while Narcissa handed Lucius something. He led me to the Christmas tree which was simply for decoration, and not particularly because the Malfoy’s were in the Christmas spirit.
Draco grabbed a long, narrow box wrapped in black wrapping paper. I looked at him suspiciously as I tore it open, finding a small white box. I knew instantly this was a jewelry box- no other box was shaped as such. I opened it gingerly and my heart swooned, my tear ducts pricking, but I refused to cry at this, no matter how sentimental.
I pull the small silver chain out of the box, holding it lightly in my hand. The charm on the necklace was an intricate, wonderfully cut silver serpent in the shape of the heart, it’s eyes glittering emeralds. In the middle, there was a solid compartment, making the necklace a locket. I opened it and this time, a single tear spilled over before I wiped it away quickly.
I had no idea how Draco could have possibly gotten the photo, but in the contents of the locket was a single black and white picture of my mother and father, dancing in circles. The smiles on their faces was filled with such joy that it heart, and I could not imagine what it was like to be so free, so happy.
I looked up at him, speechless. “How… Draco it is so beautiful I… my gift pales in comparison.”
He smiled softly. “Reagan, the greatest gift you give me every day is the simple fact that you breathe. I know the others would not agree with such a gift but… I think your parents would have wanted you to have it. Even if I disagree with it myself, I know how much it means to you.”
I laughed and shook my head. “Your gift is in the back yard.”
We ran to the back yard together, leaving his parents to their own devices. I would open the gift from Narcissa later, and I had also left the beautiful emerald bracelet I had gotten for her with her in the library. I watched as Draco narrowed his eyes at me knowingly the moment he saw my awful wrapping job.
Draco had all the money in the world. He could have easily bought a broom better than his nimbus 2001, but his father never seemed to care. He didn’t want to waste money on Draco’s endeavor of quidditch or approve of his true, raw talent. I on the other hand, thought that Draco deserved anything he wanted in order to pursue something he loved.
“Reagan,” Draco breathed, running his hand along the beautiful dark wood of the firebolt. “You lied when you said it paled in comparison.”
“I know you could have gotten one yourself, and that it’s not the best in the world, but it was all I could think to get you. A talented seeker deserves a talented broom. You deserve one.”
He stood and brought me into his chest, hugging me so tightly, that I felt he feared letting me go. “Merry Christmas, love.”

*

I climbed into Draco’s bed, instantly at ease. His sheets were intoxicated with his smell, and they were warm. Draco eased in next to me, pulling my into his warm chest. I had refused to sleep in my own room that night, knowing I would never be able to sleep.
I rest my head gently on his chest, sliding my arms around his neck and hugging him to me. His lips pressed against my forehead, warm and comforting, his arms lopping around my shoulders and resting on my back. His arms were a sanctuary, and I felt at home, lying there with the steady beat of his heart in my ears, the steady rhythm of his breathing. This is how it should have always been, and how it should always be.
After talking with his parents, I had gone to my room to change back into my pajamas. On my dresser there had been a black sheet of paper, unsigned but scrawled on it in silver writing, was a short, to the point note. It didn’t take any guessing to know whom it was from, because all it said was to disregard Narcissa Malfoy. I knew instantly this was Voldemort’s dismissal of her death. I cried tears of joy then. Our plan had worked.
“I wish we could stay like this forever,” Draco murmured in my hair, sleep thick in his voice.
I smiled. “Hush, love. Go to sleep. We have an early morning.
“I love you, Reagan.”
“I love you too, Draco.”
*

Seeing the scarlet colored engine on the platform nine and three quarters was one of the most alleviating things I had ever felt. My fingers were laced lightly with Draco’s as we moved around the bustle of the crowd returning to school for Christmas. I avoided looking around for my brother, still angry at how he and his friends had responded to my help. As far as I was concerned, he could figure things out himself until he apologized.
Draco helped me up onto the train like a gentleman, and I noticed that he didn’t so much as glance backwards at his mother or father. I turned around and waved lightly to Narcissa, who smiled sadly. She knew as well as I did that her son was not enlightened by his fathers return. Draco and his father could hardly be in the same room together.
I had learned at a young age, that all Draco wanted was some form of love from his father, some form of pride. His admiration for Lucius Malfoy was misplaced in my opinion, and no matter how hard he tried in whatever he did, Lucius was never pleased with Draco, never proud of his son’s accomplishments. He was too busy planning on how to erase his enmity from the world after Voldemort’s fall, and now all he did was grovel to Voldemort for forgiveness. It was one of the saddest things I had ever seen.
The conversation in our small compartment revolved around the holidays. I joined in the conversation far more than Draco, though. I felt the need to draw away attention from his lack of response and appeal to the chatter, so I spoke up far more than usual to Blaise, Crabbe and Goyle. If they took notice of Draco’s withdrawal, they made no comment on it.
Once returned at the school, I waited patiently for everyone else to leave the train. I hesitated and let a group of 4th years pass me, before slinking up quietly next to Draco. He turned and looked at me, his eyes distant, but he smiled. The smile didn’t reach his eyes, though, and I was suddenly struck with the feeling that something wasn’t right.
“Are you alright?” I asked him quietly, approaching the carriages. I did my best to ignore the blind white eyes of the beasts that pulled the carriages.
“Just tired, I think. It was a long ride.” The answer was insufficient; it was always a long ride to Hogwarts.
“You wouldn’t lie to me, would you?
His face became troubled, furthering my fears. “What would make you think I would lie to you?”
Blaise glanced at us then, obviously hearing the exchange that seemed to get tense, for he shifted uncomfortably. I had a strong distaste for Draco’s tone, and I rubbed my hands together, fidgeting as I so often did when I got annoyed.
“The ride was just as long as it always is. I don’t see how it being long affected you at all.”
“I did have a busy night, last night,” he said through his teeth. He had a point; he and his father had returned home late.
“Fine.”
Our tiff ended in silence all the way to the castle, even on our fellow Slytherin’s part. I felt an increasing feeling of dread crawling into my chest like a sneaky, sly creature, wrapping itself around my heart and my lungs, adding the lightest pressure. I had no idea what could possibly be starting this feeling of unease in my chest, but as I cast my glance out at the afternoon sky, I found no reassurance. Storm clouds were rolling in before night. That may not be the only storm, on this night I told myself, not understanding my own thought in the first place.

*
“Does Draco seem odd to you?” I asked Blaise quietly in the great hall. Draco was busying himself, talking quietly to Goyle. Blaise cast a glance around my shoulder, assessing Draco and shrugging.
“I suppose he’s a little standoffish, but then again he get’s like that sometimes, doesn’t he?”
Blaise had a point, but it did not allay my feelings of unease. “If you say so.”
I cast my eyes around the great hall. All seemed normal and cheerful. Chatter was loud as students shared holiday stories and gifts. The staff looked at ease as well, all conversing about their preparations for the OWLS and other end of the year plans.
I scanned Gryffindor table and found my friends- who I was not sure I was friends with right now- sitting together. Hermione was scolding Ron for something as usual, and he was responding with trying to talk with a mouth full of food. The scene made me smile some, but my smile turned into a grimace as my eyes met Ginny Weasley’s green ones. We held one another’s gaze, both threatening to do harm. Anger hiccupped in my heart and I made a silent promise to make her pay for what she had done, the little wench.
Finally my gaze fell upon Harry, whose greens eyes gazed off in the distant. He face was not frightened nor was he panicked, but rather he was in a studious daze, caught in the whirlwind of his thoughts as he so often was. Although he was my twin, I often found myself getting a complex every time I tried to guess what he was thinking, what he was feeling. Once upon a time, I thought he was predictable; that was when I didn’t know him and didn’t care to know him.
My attention broke when Draco stood. “Are we leaving?”
“I’m full,” he said, as if it were a sufficient answer. “And exhausted. I really just want sleep.”
I rose. “I’m tired too. Come on.”
We walked through the hallways silently, but it was not an uncomfortable silence much to my thanks. He even laced his fingers with mine, causing the feeling in my chest to lighten. Draco seemed to be getting back to his old self. I tried to convince myself the feeling in my chest was gone completely, although it wasn’t.
There were a few kids in the common room when we entered. We stopped to make small talk with a few before Draco yawned, looking as if he were about to pass out asleep there and then. I giggled at him, insisting he get some sleep to which he agreed gratefully, kissing me on the lips and going up his stairs.
It wasn’t until I watched his retreating figure that I yawned, realizing how tired I was. I went up to my room and fell onto my bed, inhaling the familiar scene of my room. I was happy to be home, and was ready to start a normal routine at Hogwarts. Soon we would be back to mending the cabinet, and I would be back to figuring out ways to escape from Voldemort’s grasp.
*

In my dream, I was running, but I couldn’t tell from what. Sweat poured down my faces, and I could feel my breath hitching, I could feel the fear in my gut. I thrashed at invisible enemies, and cried out to no one. Echoing in the night of my dream, I could hear an insistent cackling, one that sounded so familiar it flung me from my nightmare and into reality, panting and tangled in my sheets.
I sat up quickly, pausing as dizziness came over me and then settled. It had been the strangest of nightmares, and the cackling had been so real. I ripped the sheets away from me and closed my eyes for a moment, breathing. The hairs on the back of my neck stood up and my hand slowly slide towards my wand. Out of the corner of my eye, movement was at the door.
“Out of bed, little Lioness,” the female voice purred. She had materialized from the darkness, her dark eyes wild and her curls even wilder. My heart began pounding in my chest, and the sense of betrayal was almost overwhelming at the realization that Draco had lied to me. “We have things to take care of, little Lioness.
I nodded my head. “One moment, Bellatrix.”