Keeping His Secret

I awoke the next morning with a pounding headache. I sat up, rubbing my eyes open. The shrill ringing of my alarm clock continued next to me.

I finally shut it off.

Looking down, I was surprised to see that I hadn’t changed out of my clothes from before.

The pajama pants had ridden up my leg to my knees in my sleep. The jacket still zipped up nearly the entire way.

I shrugged out of those clothes, walking to the shower in just my boxers.

The water was rough against my skin, stinging at first touched. I eased in slowly, sucking in my breath as I adjusted the temperature to a more comfortable one.

I washed my skin harshly, trying to get the feel of Slade off of me.

This was wrong.

So very wrong.

But I went there of my own consent.

“I’ll be coming back for you, don’t fret.”

His words echoed in my head. I could hear them clearly, as if he was standing right next to me, repeating them.

I glanced around hesitantly, double checking that I was alone in the bathroom. I shivered under the warmth of the shower, washing the conditioner out of my hair.

I wrapped a towel around my waist, stepping in front of the mirror. Using my palm, I wiped away a line of condensation from the mirror.

I studied the boy in the mirror.

Brown hair forced against the head due to the weight of the water on it. Sunken in eyes from lack of sleep. A faint scar, less than an inch long, on the chin from a fight between two preschoolers. A boney body connected to a messed up head.

An incredibly unattractive boy.

Would Slade never call again?

Would he realize that the eight year old he had known grew up into a loser of a son?

Would he drop any and all contact with me?

Was this a one-time thing?

I rubbed my eyes, trying to erase the sleep from them. I needed to get a clear head. These thoughts weren’t rash, weren’t normal. They were wrong, illegal, immoral.

I walked out of the bathroom, back into the cold air.

~*~

“You ok?” Sara asked softly at lunch.

I nodded slowly, staring at my food.

“You seem out of it more than usual.” She commented, taking a bite of her sandwich. I shrugged, not touching my food.

I wasn’t hungry.

“You want to ditch?” She asked quietly, looking around to make sure no one was listening to our conversation.

I shook my head, “Can’t. I ditched yesterday, remember?”

“Daniel, you can trust me. You know this right?” She asked quietly. I moved my eyes to hers, holding her gaze.

Should I tell her? She was the closest person I had at school. We’d done a lot of shit together. I did trust her the most.

But the trust only went so far.

What if I told her about what happened last night and she freaked? Any normal person would find it disgusting that I had went to meet my childhood perv at an ungodly hour of the night.

Any normal person would find it disgusting that I was anxiously awaiting his next visit too.

But Sara wasn’t any normal person. She was the girl who hated society, despite society loving her. She was the girl who ate lunch with the quiet loser every day at school, despite what things were said about her. The girl who left school randomly with me, despite the punishments we both received as an aftermath.

I was unsure about whether I could tell her or not and still remain friends afterwards. It was iffy.

I took the safe root, nodding my head calmly. “I’m fine, Sara. I don’t really feel like talking to day, is all.”

She sighed slightly, “I’m here if you need me. Whatever it is, got it?”

I gave her a half smile. “Got it.”

It was silent as she ate her food for a few moments. The pizza before me was getting cold quickly. Maybe I shouldn’t have bought it period.

Sara’s eyes flickered down to my full tray.

“Do you want it?” I asked, nudging it slightly towards her. “I guess I’m not that hungry today…”

She shook her head, taking a sip of her water, “I’m full as it is. I shouldn’t be eating anymore.”

“What? Are you going on a diet or something?” I teased.

A faint tint of red spread across her cheeks. For Sara, that was a major embarrassment blow I landed.

I raised an eyebrow, leaning back casually in my seat. I crossed my arms over my chest with a smirk on my lips, “Does someone have a little crush on a boy?”

“No.” She mumbled almost inaudibly.

“Who is it?”

“It’s no one.”

“Aw, but Sara you never get little crushes!” I forced a chuckle out. “You need to tell me who it is.”

Sara bit her lip for a moment before looking at my slyly. “I’ll make a deal with you.”

“Shoot.”

“I’ll tell you who I might, possibly like, if you tell me what it is that’s bugging you so much today.”

“I don’t like this deal.”

“Neither do I. But I think it’s pretty fair, don’t you?” She masqueraded her wickedness with a soft smile.

“I’ll be revealing more than you will be in this deal.” I argued.

She shrugged, “That’s the only deal I’m doing.”

“Alright, I’ll just wait until you and this mystery man finally hook up. It won’t be too long.” I said casually.

She bit her lip, “I don’t exactly stand a chance…”

“What do you mean?”

“I’ll tell you if you tell me.”

“You’re such a bitch sometimes, Sara.” I rolled my eyes.

The bell rang.

I stood up, slinging my backpack over my shoulder. Sara did the same, walking over towards the crowd rushing out of the door.

“I know, Daniel.” She said softly, “But remember the deal because that’s the only one I’m going to make with you.”

“I can wait.”

“Then you’ll be waiting forever.”

“I’m sure it’s not that bad.”

We walked out into the hallway, taking the longer route.

“Are you sure you don’t want to ditch the rest of the day?” She asked as we approached our escape room “It’ll be a hell of a lot more fun if you’re there.”

I nodded, “I can’t risk doing it twice back-to-back like that. Have fun.”

“I probably won’t.”

“Sucks to be you.”

She rolled her eyes, walking into the empty room. I gave a small wave, continuing on my way to my next class.

I wasn’t looking forward to this at all.

As I walked into the class room, I felt a small vibrate in the pocket of my jeans. I sat down at a desk, using my books to hide as I pulled my phone out.

The message was from an unknown number.

I clicked it open, reading the box.

My heartbeat sped up drastically.

‘See you tonight Danny.’

Finally.