I Love You, but I Fear Love

I got into the car and waited for Matthew, Hailey, and Cara. While I waited, I put Gerard's number into my phone and saved it. God, why is this kid so... Lovable? Ugh.

"November! What were you doing with that druggie and his friends?" Matthew asked as he got into the car, making me jump in my seat.

"Matthew, it's not nice to say things like that. Besides, everyone knows he's an alcoholic." Hailey said as she got into the back. I rolled my eyes. Right as I was about to defend Gerard, Cara spoke up in her soft voice.

"I heard that he's both." Hailey and Matthew looked at her and then at each other. Then they shrugged and nodded, agreeing with her. I rolled my eyes again and started up the car.

"Guys, you can't go around saying things like that. Gerard and his friends are really nice guys and they offered to hang out with me. So, don't say mean things about them. It's rude." I started driving to our house, carefully avoiding other drivers.

"Well, it's true..." Matthew muttered as he turned to look out the window. I sighed and turned onto our street. I pulled up to our house, which was big and brown. I stopped the car and turned it off. All three of them ran to the door, leaving me behind, yet again. I sighed and walked up to the house with my back pack in hand.

"Oh, November! How was your first day of school?" I cringed at my foster mother, Sasha's overly cheery voice.

"Hi, Sasha." I said, walking into the kitchen where she was preparing dinner. "My day was fine. I met some really nice people and they offered to hang out with me." I put down my backpack and started inching towards the stairs.

"Oh, well that's wonderful. Oh, dear, I have a friend coming over tonight, and she's bringing over her two boys, who are about your age. I hope it would be okay if they hung out with you, November." I mentally sighed, but nodded. I was expecting the worst.

I went up to my room and went onto my computer, which, surprise surprise, was also plain white. I went to iTunes and started playing Green Day. I put on Holiday and went and laid on my bed.

I pulled out my phone and decided to text Gerard.

Hey, Gerard. It's Ember =] I closed my phone and waited for his reply, which came quickly.

hey, ember! what's up?

No much. Just waiting for my... Mom's friend to come over. What about you?

just about to leave. my mom has this book club thing, and shes forcing me and mikey to go with.

Aw, I'm sorry! Oh well, at least you have me =]

very, very true ;) I blushed a bit, and then felt horrible about it. I sighed and was about to text back when I heard the door bell from downstairs. I got up and yelled that I got it. I ran to the door and opened it wide open to revile a woman and two teenage boys who looked oddly familiar.

"Ember!" Gerard ran in and just about tackled me in a hug. I laughed and patted his back.

"Gerard, you're cutting off my air." I struggled to say. He instantly let go and his cheeks were a bit flushed.

"Sorry, Ember." He said sheepishly. I smiled.

"It's fine, Gerard." I turned to the woman and Mikey.

"Hello, ma'am, I'm November. I know your sons from school." I smiled and held out my hand, which she gladly took.

"Oh, hello, dear! So, you're Sasha and Larry's new daughter? That's lovely." She beamed at me and I saw Gerard raise an eyebrow at her words. She let go of my hand and went in search of Sasha. I sighed softly and turned back to the brothers. I realized that Mikey was still outside with his hands jammed into his jeans pockets.

"Mikey! Come inside!" I said and took his arm to bring him inside. He smiled a bit and gave a soft chuckle as I closed the door behind him. I turned around to face Gerard, who was still giving me an odd look.

"What?" I asked, suddenly very self conscious under his heavy, hazel gaze.

"What did my mom mean by 'Sasha's new daughter'?" I looked down at my Converse-clad feet.

"I-I'm her new foster child..." I said, still looking down.

"Oh, Ember... I-I didn't mean to make you uncomfortable..." Gerard walked over slowly and wrapped me into an embrace. I looked up and met Mikey's hazel eyes. He gave me a sad little look. I broke away from Gerard and walked over to Mikey.

"I'm gonna hug you, okay?" I asked. Mikey looked into my eyes and gave me a small smile. I reached out and wrapped my arms around his tall, slender frame. I felt his arms wrap around my small shoulders, tightening the embrace. I smiled.

"Group hug!" Gerard rushed over and wrapped his arms tightly around me and Mikey, sandwiching my in the middle. I laughed and started flailing my arms around.

"Guy, I'm stuck!" I laughed again and so did they. Gerard finally let go and I led them to my room. I opened the door and Gerard had a mini spaz attack.

"Ahh!!! It's so bright and white!!!" He fell to the floor and started twitching. I looked at him with wide eyes and looked up at Mikey who was just chuckling and shaking his head.

"Gerard, you're such a drama queen." Mikey said, and picked Gerard up by his arm. Gerard brushed off his pants and gave me a smile. My stomach did a little flip, which I regretted.

Gerard walked over to my bed and flopped down onto it. I walked into my room and sat down in my computer chair. Mikey followed close behind and sat down on my bed with Gerard.

"Okay, if you're going to sit on my bed, shoes off!" I said. Gerard looked at me and saw that I was serious and slipped off his shoes, reviling one black sock and one electric blue sock. Mikey also took off his shoes, showing a pair of plain black socks.

"Come on, Ember. Come sit next to me!" Gerard smiled and sat up, patting the mattress next to him. I smiled and untied my Converse and took them off, reviling my neon rainbow Hello Kitty socks. Gerard let out a laugh.

"What? Can't a girl have neon Hello Kitty socks?" I asked with a smile. He just smiled and shook his head. I sat down on my bed and crawled over to Gerard and sat down next to him.

"So, what are we gonna do?" I asked and rested my head against my wall. Mikey shrugged and Gerard put on his thinking face. Suddenly, he gave a little gasp and turned his head to look at Mikey. I heard him whisper something, but I couldn't make out the words. Mikey laughed and shook his head.

"You know if you do that, you're pretty much committing suicide, right? I barely know her and I already know that." I felt my nose scrunch up in confusion.

"What? What's he gonna do?" I asked. Gerard turned to look at me with a sly smile.

"I'm gonna do... This!" He then started attacking my sides, making me laugh so hard that I felt tears forming in my eyes.

"S-Stop, G-Gerard! I m-mean it!" I managed to get out through my laughter. He just laughed and shook his head. Soon, he ended up on top of me. He stopped and stared down into my eyes. I felt my breathing slow, but my heart rate remained the same. He started to lean down a bit, but I bit my lip and turned my head away from his face. His face fell a bit, but he sat up and acted like nothing happened.

But Mikey obviously knew.

For the rest of the time, we talked about my past families, though I refrained from telling him about my alcoholic foster mom. I told him about the wild and random foster siblings I had, like the girl in my third home who was obsessed with the fact that she thought unicorns were real. She was seventeen.

After a while, we all drifted off to sleep. The last thing I remembered was my head falling onto Gerard's shoulder and his arm wrapping around my waist to pull me close.

Oops.