Right Girl

“No! I don’t like your camera angle”

Sam and I are taking a picture using my phone. I don’t know what has gotten into our minds and suddenly we want to take a picture and just fool around with each other.

With our feelings now exposed from one another, we can move freely than before because we know the reason. Unlike a few months ago, we were not clear of what we really are to each other but now I know that Sam will be mine soon, I can tell.

I won’t hurt her, I will never.. I’ll try.

“Garrett! You look stupid in the picture!” Sam started to laugh and rolled on the bed. I laughed with her and lied down on the bed beside her.

“It’s been almost a year, Garrett” Sam whispered as she closes her eyes.

“What about it?” I sighed loudly and grabbed my phone from her hands.

“Since you knocked on my door and are sorry for bullying me. I still wonder what my life would be right now if you didn’t do something like that. Would I still be the loser who has trust issues or the new girl who tries to fit in.. But I wouldn’t be like this if not for you” Sam giggled and turned her body to face me.

I pinched her cheeks and laughed, “If I didn’t do those things, I wouldn’t be here; I would never change to a better man”

My phone suddenly started to ring and I’m not surprised if it’s going to be John or the rest of the four who kept on bugging me about Sam’s condition.

"Hello?" Being irritated was obviously heard from my voice.

"“Garrett, I need to talk to you about the plan!” John responded with almost a whisper.

I ran outside the room and into the CR to talk to John privately because this is something that Sam should not hear, she should not know any of this, she should not hear this.

“Garrett, go to my house now!” John ordered.

I sighed heavily because I was having a good time with Sam and John comes along to ruin everything. Why is it that when something good happens, something or someone has to ruin everything?

“Fine, I’ll be there!”

I ran towards Sam room and caught her trying different hairstyles for hair in front of the mirror. I smiled at her clumsiness and sat on her bed before leaving.

“Hair up or hair down?” She asked.

“Anything will do. You look good in both, anyways. Uh, Sam, I have to go to John’s house. Emergency” I can’t believe I’m lying to her like this.

“Yeah, sure. Just call me if you’ll come back. I charged my phone” Sam giggled.

I ran towards my car and drove all the way down to John’s house. I just wish this conversation will end today because I don’t want to talk about this ever.

“Hi, sir!” I greeted John’s dad as he pointed out John was at his room.

“Garrett, eat first before you go up” requested by John’s mom. I shook my head and smiled sweetly at them because they welcomed me dearly.

I made my way to John’s room. No knocking, I opened John’s door and saw him lying on his bed, still wearing his boxers. “You made me come here and you’re still looking like that!” I fooled around.

“If you’re a girl, I would have added a shirt on but only a shirt” He replied with his morning voice. Looks like John just woke up from his long sleep.

“What if I brought Sam here, huh?” I teased.

John rolled his eyes and gasped, “You wouldn’t because I’m here to remind you about your stupid plan”

“John, I get it okay. Let it go! But.. Uh, I don’t know anymore” I sighed and sat on his bed feeling depressed.

10 months ago:

“John! John! I have a big idea!” I came down running to John and even pulled him away from the girls he was talking with.

“John, Kyle Brooks, the owner of the big music company that I’m telling you, well, her daughter is my classmate, Samantha Brooks” I continued to say as I find the right words to say because of my excitement.

John looked at me weirdly, “So? Why are you telling me this, Garrett?”

I shook John’s shoulders, “I can use Samantha. She’s like a loser girl at school and yeah, I can use her. Pretend that I’m sorry for everything, be friends with her and get her dad to watch us live”

John frowned, I wanted to punch his frown away, “Garrett, know the consequences. First: She might know about this and you might regret everything. Second: You might have the possibility fall in love with her”

I laughed so hard at John and punched his arm playfully, “I won’t let those happen, swear! I’m telling you”

“You know in movies, where a guy meets a loser girl and it turns out, the loser girl was all the guy would want in a girlfriend, well, that might happen to you” John warned.

“Shit. You and your secret addiction to chick flicks, shut up! I won’t let that happen” I answered happily.

John looked at me weirdly and looked back at the crowd of girls he just left, “Whatever you say, Garrett. I’m just saying the possibilities” John grabbed my ear and pulled it.

I shrugged his hand away from my ear and sighed, “Whatever you say. I have to pick career first before anything else. Fuck love”

“What if that Samantha Brooks turns out to be the girl of your dreams?” John asked out of curiosity.

“She’s just a loser. Don’t worry about that, that will never happen, John. We just have to make Kyle Brooks watch our show and we’ll be fucking famous!” I shouted.

“But if I told you to stop and you wouldn’t, I would have to butt in” John said.

I nodded and laughed sarcastically, “Do whatever you want. Just don’t take the record deal away”

Present time:

She’s just a loser. Don’t worry about that, that will never happen, John

I can’t believe what I’ve said. It was the opposite of what happened right now. John warned me but I was too hard headed to even listen to him. Now, I like Sam and I’ll hurt her if she finds out about my real purpose.

“Garrett, you have to fucking stop!” John shouted at me. I know he wasn’t joking. The John I’m talking to right now is the serious type of man and not the prankster one.

I know I did something wrong but I can’t just stop everything. I like Sam; I can’t just turn my back on her after knowing her true feelings. She’s the best and I can’t just leave her because.. I just can’t. I know one day this secret will be known but now, until no one knows except John, I’ll spend more of my time with Sam as I can.

“John, you know I like Sam so much!”

“That’s the consequence of your fucking plan!” he trailed off.

“We both know that one day, this shit will be out and she’s going to find out! Garrett, Sam’s a very awesome girl. That’s why I tried talking to her because I want to know what she’s like. Turns out, she’s sweet, caring and so nice, she’s going to get really hurt when she finds out about this stuff” John continued yelling at me.

I scratched my head and pushed John aside, “Where the hell are you going?” He asked angrily.

“I’m going to somewhere far from this shit. I need some time to think stuff through” I tried to explain to John but he just wouldn’t listen.

John can’t understand my feelings for Sam. He wouldn’t because he knows I suck at relationships and I wouldn’t do this just because of love, of course the record deal. All in John’s head is I’m the bad guy who doesn’t do any thinking at all and leave things fucked up.

No, I fucking like Sam and I’m not going to screw it up. Fuck the record deal, all I want is Sam. Why can’t he understand that? Why can’t anyone understand me now? All I want was this girl who became the girl I ever dreamed of.

I don’t know where I’ll go. I just want to drive into a place where it’s quiet, no one can see the anger in my eyes and how stupid I look like. I want to cry this pain out and it’s not normal for me to do something like that. I feel like shit everyday and only Sam makes me feel loved and look what I’ve done to her without her having a single clue.

“FUCK YOU GARRETT! YOU’RE SUCH AN ASSHOLE!” I shouted to myself as I leaned on my car’s trunk at a dead highway.

“YOU FUCKING RUINED EVERYTHING!”

“YOU STARTED TO LIKE HER 6 MONTHS AGO, NOW LOOK WHAT YOU DID!”

“You fucking.. You fucking stupid little---“

I looked at my phone and it took me 3 hours of driving and I got 5 missed calls from Sam, 1 missed call from John, 2 messages from Sam.

First message was:

“You must be kidding, right? You’re not answering my calls. John called me and said that you walked out from him. Where are you? By John’s voice, he’s worried. Call me when you read this”

Second message:

"Just call me. They're worried, okay? Call me"

I don’t know how I can face Sam without looking away or feeling guilty. I already forgot about this but John had to remind me and now I’m so ashamed of what I’ve done. I hate myself right now.

I’m sorry, Sam. I really am.

I drove back to town and it was really weird because I don't know if I should go straight to Sam when my eyes are really puffy and so red. I grabbed my phone because a while ago, I kept ignoring Sam's call and messages and she might think the wrong way again.

I had text from Pat:

“Hey, John's looking for you. So text him or just call him. He's freaking out a little. That's not good, right?"

I decided to go to Sam's house instead because even though she doesn't have an idea of what happened because she can't know, she's the only person I want to be with right now and I'm not going to feel any better if I'll go home.

I knocked on Sam's house. I heard her run the stairs and even complained about hitting the edge of the couch. I don't get how her clumsiness can get me feel better.

She opened the door with a frown on her face. “What? I'm here!” I said as I barged in her house following her.

“Wow. Yes, you are” She answered sarcastically.

Sam made her way up to her room and slammed the door shut. She's mad at me because I made her worry. I even made John worry.

I knocked on Sam's door even when I know it's not locked. “Garrett! It's open!” She shouted from the inside.

I opened the door and saw her watching some TV. I sat beside her on her bed and sighed, “Hey, are you mad or something?” I asked while she searches for a good show.

“Nope, not mad” She answered quickly.

“Are you mad?” I repeated.

“John called, he was worried because you took off. He even called Pat, Kennedy and Jared but they don't know where you were. Then he called me with his voice shaking, then I tried to call you but you won't pick up” She answered.

“My mom called me. She asked if I can buy her baking ingredients and I couldn't pick up my phone because I went to the supermarket with her. She ordered me around like a boss, okay. I hate it when she does that” Of course, I have to lie to get it through.

Sam turned off the TV and sighed, “Did you know that they were worried sick? John told me that he'll kick your ass if you still won't reply to his text; Pat told me he'll kick you down to his balls when he sees you; Kennedy was shouting all over my ear, because he was worried; Jared said, he'll punch you until you say you give up because you made him worry. Look at them, Garrett”

“I asked John if you had a problem, he said band issues and I can't know about it. But all I want was to help you but I can't because band issues I can't know about it” Sam mocked John's voice as she said that.

“You're good at copying John's voice, Sam!” I tried to tease to change the topic.

Sam giggled a little but soon came back to the topic, “I don't have any idea what happened or what's band issue but every time you're feeling down, you can always come to me” Sam bit her lower lip and grabbed a pillow to hug.

“I know that, I always know you're there for me, Sam”

I grabbed my phone and smiled to myself. “Why are you smiling?” Sam wondered. I showed her my wallpaper.

“Oh fuck!” She exclaimed.

It was a picture of her a long time ago when she was still the loser girl who gets picked on by our schoolmates.

“How did you get that?” She asked as she grabbed my phone.

“That was the day when you told me you wanted to change your image. I secretly took a picture of you and saved it on my phone ever since. Because I just want to keep the old you too while you change to the new you” I explained as I caught her gasped.

“I hate you, Garrett” She said in lost of words.

“Well, I like me too” I joked.

I don't like to lie at her face and pretend like everything is totally fine. But the thing is, once I blow up, I can lose this girl and I can't take that. A have this big chance of having her and by that little mistake, I can lose everything that I have right now.

All these time, I just used her and now, I fell for her. Things are really complicated and it sucks.