The Frayed Ends Of Sanity

Zacky and I migrated to the living room and sat on the couch. Instead of saying what I intended on saying, I blurted out, "Do you want some ice for your eye? It looks kind of swollen."

"Naw, I'll get some later." Damn, I thought for sure that would work.

"Stop messing around. Tell him!" my mind screamed at me.

I sighed. "Zacky, I--" I was cut off mid-sentence by Zacky pressing his lips to mine. I sat still as he kissed me, too shocked to move. He pulled away when I didn't kiss him back and blushed. Apparently he thought I didn't want to be kissed.

I felt bad for embarrassing him so I placed a gentle kiss on his lips. Almost immediately Zacky deepened the kiss. I think I'm falling in love. This probably wasn't good. I pulled away quickly causing Zacky to groan.

"I'm sorry. I can't do this." He stared at me questioningly.

"The thing is...Shit I don't even know where to start." I sighed and took a deep breath. "Well, I have suspicions about my parents' deaths."

"What does that have to do with us making out?" he asked somewhat impatiently. I didn't mind the impatientness. I understood why it was there.

"Hold on. I'm getting there." He muttered a quick apology and I went on.

"Well, I guess to start out, my job isn't ordinary. I'm an assassin." Zacky didn't even flinch when I said it. I relaxed a little to his calm attitude.

"My boss has told me he has a lot of enemies. I know my theory is a bit far-fetched but it's a possible one. I think whoever killed my parents could possibly be one of those enemies and somehow this is their way of getting to my boss. Hell, if that's true, they could be after me for some reason for all I know."

Zacky calmly said, "So you think your job could somehow be connected to your parents' deaths?"

I nodded. "And if it is true, I think I might be putting you in danger too." I felt tears in my eyes again. I didn't want to say this next part. I wanted to be with Zacky but I wouldn't be able to live with myself if he got hurt (or worse) at my expense.

"I don't think we should go any further with this relationship," I finally managed through my tears. I turned away, not wanting to see the expression on Zacky's face.

"Raven, I love you and I've worked too hard to get you to even like me. Can't we give it a chance?"

I bit my lip so I wouldn't cry out. I wanted to try it, but I knew itwouldn't couldn't work.

"How about if I make you a deal?"

I looked back at him curiously.

"If we give this a shot, I promise if things start getting bad, I'll leave you alone from then on."

That could possibly work. I know I'll be devastated if things go wrong, but at least I'll have him until then.

"Okay, I guess we can try."

Zacky pulled me onto his lap and kissed me on the cheek. "I love you Raven."

"I love you too."

Zacky started stroking my hair and I cuddled into his chest.

"Don't tell anyone about my job, okay?" He nodded.

I wished Zacky and I could stay together. But, I knew it was only a matter of time before something went horribly wrong. I just hoped, no prayed, that that amount of time was a long way from now.