That Girl

What was he missing?

Pete had sent me here to better a band, and he wouldn’t directly tell me why via phone or text, so I’d been antisocial to the max for five days, trapped in the cage of my own mind, ripping my god damn hair out over it. Obviously, my insomnia was back, and I might just die from sleep deprivation. No joke.

And there I was, thinking I wouldn’t end up doing that over a guy my age. Especially when it should’ve been so fucking simple.

The notes and the riffs and the chords were brilliant and only needed a few polishing touches.

The lyrics were something I wouldn’t dare trying to edit.

Everything was organized and styled down to how long the back-up note was held.

What else was there?

And then it hit me, like a Head On Collision, pun intended. “The voice.”

“The kid still needs some vocal work, but he has damn good lyrics.”

I was primarily a lyricist, not a vocal teacher. And so the cycle started all over again, because Pete couldn’t- wouldn’t put that on my shoulders…

Would he? It took a moment’s thought to reach a logical conclusion.

He would.

“Because things change, and so do people.” He’d said after I’d questioned why he’d begun to date Ashlee.

The only question was: What about the voice?

*.*.*

“Hey,” Alex’s voice was rough as he spoke. He knocked on my door, clearing his throat as he said, “Uh, dinner’s ready, Stella.”

“The voice!” I declared probably sounding like a crazed escaped mental patient. I snapped my fingers, flashing around with a victorious smile. My disheveled hair probably freaked him out.

“Um, are you okay? Like, mentally?” He asked, gulping. I nodded:

“Just fine, thank you.” I informed, on sleepy cloud nine. I’d really been shifting into the nicer personality while blocking out everyone like Brendon had suggested so long ago. It felt nice to be nice. “I figured it out, is all.”

“What was that, again?”

“Hm?” I asked, practically humming with glee. He looked terrified now. My last few days of silence had probably made all of the guys wary.

“What were you figuring out?”

“What was missing from your band. Well, maybe not missing, but what was off.”

“Oh.” Oh is right, dearest Gaskank. He seemed a bit offended. “What’s wrong with the band?”

“Sing.” I commanded, not directly answering his question. He seemed a bit startled.

“I just got back from band practice.” He protested, “I can’t sing.”

I thought for a moment: was it his range? “What note is your highest?”

He shrugged, “I don’t know.”

It took a bit to scrounge up the confidence, “Match the notes.” I told him, easily hitting a High G.

“I can’t sing.” He sounded a bit irritated. I held the note, motioning for him to join in. He hit it, although his voice was rough with exhaustion. He sounded strained, though. Like he was pushing on his chords too hard.

Too much strength. And he was exhausting his chances at stamina by using more energy than he needed to.

That’s it!

Apparently I voiced my thought out loud.

“What’s it? I can hit the notes.” He seemed genuinely confused.

“We’re going to find you a new way of singing.” I said with a shit-eating grin, the bags under my eyes suddenly felt very heavy from my intense lack of sleep. I collapsed.

*.*.*

“OH MY GOD! IS SHE OKAY?!” I felt as though my head were on something very… squishy. And there was water, and Mrs. Gaskarth’s heavily accented voice. Wasn’t she on a business trip with Mr. G? “I LEAVE YOU ALONE FOR TWO WEEKS AND YOU KILL THE GIRL?!”

“Mum! She’ll be fine, she’s just not sleeping well, is all-.”

“ARE YOU KIDDING, ALEXANDER WILLIAM?! SHE LOOKS LIKE THE DEAD!” A shrill voice startled me. This sure was an odd dream… “SHE SHOULD BE HOSPITALIZED! COULDN’T YOU HAVE MADE SURE SHE SLEPT?! YOU CALL YOURSELF AN ADULT!”

“How the fuck do you suppose I do that?!” Alex seemed offended, British accent nearly as prominent as his mother’s. “I’m not her babysitter, for God’s sake mum, she’s older than me.”

“By nine months!” Mrs. G was still yelling. I just wanted a dream with visible images, versus just audio. “I know that you know how to take care of her. You played Daniel’s song to lull her to sleep a week and a half ago. Jack told me.”

“That was when she was drunk, mum. It’s different.”

“You let her get drunk?!” Mrs. G exclaimed.

“She mixed up the Mike’s Hard Lemonade with the real kind. And again, I’m not her babysitter, mum.”

“You’re just too concerned with that Lisa girl to even care in the slightest for the girl who’s becoming sleep-deprived over you boys.” Mrs. Gaskarth said lowly.

“It’s not my fault!” Alex said again, “Lisa’s my girlfriend, mum. Stella just intruded-.”

“Don’t you dare go there Alexander. Mr. Wentz is one of your idols, and this is his equally, if not more-so talented daughter. He asked every one of us parents before accepting Hopeless’s offer. You should be happy to open up your home to her. She’s going to become part of the band’s family, whether you like it or not.”

“Hey man.” Jack’s voice. The sound of a door closed shut. “I just got the news, is she okay?”

“What happened to her?” A female voice asked quietly. Footsteps, “Oh my gosh, is this the lead singer from Time After Twelve? Ooh, she’s so pretty in person! Alex, you’re lucky.” I felt a hand on my cheek, “I can’t wait to meet her.”

“Jeannie.” Jack chuckled. More footsteps, another door opening and closing, “She’s not dating Alex.”

“Then why is her head on his lap?”

“Because he likes her but doesn’t have the guts to ask her out,” Zack’s baritone voice sounded, before his chest rumbled with laughter as Alex protested. “Got here as fast as I could.”

“I like her socks...” Jeannie said absently.

“I’m with Lisa, you morons.” His words fell on deaf ears, accent distorted now with the presence of his friends.

A sigh from Mrs. Gaskarth’s direction across from me. “I can’t wait until she’s my daughter-in-law. I’ll go make some tea.” Weight lifted from near my feet.

The door opened and closed again. The muted sound of rushed heels against tile. Kara. “OH MY GOD! IS SHE OKAY?! ALEX, WHAT DID YOU DO TO HER?!”

“Kara, calm down.” Rian’s voice, “I’m sure she’ll be fine once she recovers.”

I felt a hand on my forehead, “Alex, what the hell is she wearing?” Kara said incredulously.

“I think her subconscious goes for brutally ironic humor.” Alex said awkwardly, I felt hands brushing my hair out of my face and behind my shoulders. Rough, calloused hands. Not soft and feminine like before.

“I was referring to the fact that she was wearing your jacket, but yeah, the shirt’s a bit disturbing.” Kara muttered the last sentence.

“Huh.” Zack snorted, “So where’s your girl in times like these, Alex?” Zack asked, and I could practically feel the irritation behind his words.

“She doesn’t even know Stella-.”

“Neither do I.” Jeannie blurted, “Are you talking about that Lisa girl?” There was a short pause, “She’s a bully.”

“What?” Jack’s voice.

“She tried to push me around when I transferred to Dulaney. Made fun of me because of the way I dressed and painted my nails. I really hate nail polish now.”

Kara fussed over Jeannie, “Oh my God! If only’ I’d known you back then! I would’ve beat the hell out of her!”

There was a collective laugh before Alex spoke, clearly pissed off, “If you guys are going to gossip about my girlfriend, then do it when I’m not around. I like her-.”

“Really?”

“Really.” Alex repeated in response to Zack’s one-worded question. “Besides, why do you guys keep pairing off me, one of the guys in this band who’s taken, with her when Zack’s conveniently single?”

“Oh, I wouldn’t be so sure.” I could almost see Jeannie’s devilish grin. My subconscious must’ve really had her in my good books if she was portrayed as this awesome of a person. She was like me, minus the cursing problem.

Zack cleared his throat, “That’s beside the point. Nobody likes Lisa, and until you two have a relationship with some sort of legitimate consistency, where you’re exchanging ‘I love you’s’ instead of fucking in the back seat every chance you get, we’re not going to lay off.”

“I like Stella already,” Jeannie added, “If she’s brooding over your record to this extent, then she’s worth your time. We'll be sisters.”

“See?” Mrs. Gaskarth said, with a few choruses of ‘Thanks Mrs. G!’ ringing through the room with the familiar clink of china. “She’s already part of the family. It doesn’t matter what you think about it.” I felt the weight from before return.

“I can’t wait for tour.” Jack said with a chuckle, “The sexual tension between those two is going to be through the roof.”

“I still can’t believe she’s never had a boyfriend.” Rian scoffed.

“I’d bet she hasn’t had her first kiss yet, either.” Mrs. Gaskarth added.

I could imagine the series of grins on the group’s faces. Save for well, Alex’s. “Watch, someone’s going to spontaneously steal it.”

“Ten on Alex!” Kara called.

“I don’t know…” Mrs. Gaskarth said, “I called those Panic! boys to ask them if this had ever happened when she’d worked with them, and that Ryan boy just about had a heart attack. The Brendon and Spencer kids freaked out as well. I wouldn’t be surprised if when those boys come to town when their tour ends, one of those three doesn’t steal it.” Oddly, the sound of Ryan's name stimulated my senses, and I was painfully aware that I wasn't sleeping.

“Oh, well, if she ends up with Ryan… Oh my gosh, isn’t he, like, nineteen?” There was a squeal, “They’d be so cute together!”

“You mean their perverted songwriter?” Alex asked as the petting of my hair halted. I felt my fists clench as he laughed humorlessly, “They’re both hopeless idiots who hate romance.”

“How can you say you know her or even Ryan that well?” Kara said. Thank you, love.

“His lyrics say it all. He’ll probably just fuck her and be done with it.” Alex laughed. Somehow, my eyes opened. I was mildly delirious, and I glared at the underside of Alex’s chin before sitting up quickly. Blackness fogged my vision, but a feminine hand steadied me.

“Don’t…” I gasped out, glaring in Alex’s direction, Mrs. Gaskarth handed me a cup of tea, the liquid soothing my dry throat and lips. “you dare talk about Ryan that way. I’ll punch your egoistical ass to Mars, you prick.”

Mrs. G gasped from next to me, “Stella!” She exclaimed, aghast.

“In that state?” He asked rhetorically.

My eyes narrowed as I gained my vision back, “Don’t test me, Gaskank. I lived on the streets for three years.”

There was a feminine laugh. Not as boisterous as Kara’s. I turned, coming face to face with a petite brunette and Jack, with the latter’s arm wrapped around the former’s waist as they knelt in front of the couch. I assumed it was Jeannie. “Sorry, but that was a good one. I’ll have to use it sometime.”

I smiled thinly, “Hi, I’m Stella.”

“I’m Jeannie.” She replied with a thousand watt smile. I turned to Jack, who was sipping at a cup of tea.

“So when are you two getting married?”

Cue the spit take.

Jack sputtered out something unintelligible, eyes like saucers.

“Well, things are shaping up to be pretty odd around here, wouldn’t you say?” Mrs. Gaskarth said with her heavy British accent still in full swing, breaking the silence, “Well, drink up dear, we don’t want to mourn over your casket just yet now, would we?”

Now my eyes were as wide as Jack’s, “Um, no ma’am.”

“Right.” She patted my cheek, “Well, I’m off to bed now, lovelies. Feel free to sleep here. Air mattresses are in the door next to the washroom.”

As I got up, I felt myself sway, before collapsing, barely being caught by Zack, “God, Stella. You’re a mess.”

I shot him a tired smile as he scooped me up bridal style, his weightlifting actually proving to be somewhat useful.

“Let’s get you to bed.” He said softly, carrying me up the stairs with flourish. I leaned my head against his chest, the exhaustion overwhelming me once more.

“Thanks Zack.”