On Thin Lines

The next morning was a very quiet one, during breakfast we just sat there and ate our pancakes while I sat there wondering what I said wrong yesterday. On some occasions, he would look up at me but never said anything.

"Ryan?" I called finally breaking the silence. He looked up at me without saying a word. "Did I say something wrong?"

"No." And that was all he said before he stood up and made his way to the swimming pool at the back of the house.

I sighed and decided to clear the dishes. I was in the middle of washing up when Ryan came in, "Since when do you do dishes?"

I continued washing, "Is there anything wrong with me washing up?"

"I never said there was, it's just that I'm not used to seeing you at home all the tim-"

"Is there something you want to tell me?" I cut him off and turned around, tucking my hair behind my ear.

He stared at me like I just did something out of the ordinary, "What?"

I suddenly realised what I said. I didn't want him to know that I knew about Rachel. "Uh, forget it." I walked towards the room but he grabbed my hand.

"What has gotten into you? Maybe there's something you would like to tell me."

I smiled and looked up at him, "I don't hide anything from you."

He stared at me for a while, "Brad invited us for dinner." He said never taking his eyes off me. "Are you going?"

"If you're going." He let me go and nodded.

"I'm going to the gym, be ready by seven."

He's going to see Rachel.

I peeped through the window until his car was gone and quickly grabbed my phone, "Hello? Susan?"

"Diane, are you okay?"

"I know you might freak out about what I'm about to ask you but I need you to do it." I said in a hurry.

There was silence before she finally spoke, "This is not illegal, is it?"

"I need you to follow my husband and see where his going, he told me he was going to the gym and I just want to know for sure if he's cheating on me, it's driving me crazy. I would have gone myself but I'm likely to get noticed.

"You're joking, right? You want me to stalk your husband?"

I sighed, "Please?" The line was silent and I thought she had disconnected, "Susan?"

"Where is he?" she sighed.

I smiled, "Thank you so much." I put a tracking device in his car and I gave her the address. Call me crazy but I bet any woman who was in love with her husband and wanted to save their marriage would probably do what I'm doing.

Susan sighed, "The only reason I'm doing this is because I love you and I want you to be happy."

I thanked her and told her to be careful and disconnected the call.

What if he was actually cheating on me?

Or what if he wasn't. Maybe I misinterpreted the text.

I suddenly went to panic mode. I regretted ever telling Susan to find out because now I didn't want to know. If he was cheating on me, it's totally my fault.

I can't blame him.

I laid on the bed and tried to think of the first time Ryan told me he was in love with me.

****

We were having dinner with my parents and that was the first time Ryan was meeting them. We took our seats and my mum kept smiling which was making me uneasy. "Mum, what's wrong?"

She shook her head, "I'm happy for you. You know you never were the dating type or at least that's what I thought. Actually, no I thought you were a lesbian."

My eyes widened and my mouth dropped, "Mum!"

My dad smiled and looked at Ryan, "Young man, what's your name?"

"Ryan Gosling sir."

My dad stared at him, "You're father won't be the Gosling with the software company, would he?"

Ryan nodded, "He is and that's where I actually work."

My dad nodded, "That's very impressive, you know these days boys your age won't be working if they're father had all the money in the world."

Ryan smiled, "Yeah, he was pretty surprised when I decided I wanted to work for him."

They both laughed and I spoke up, "I'm sure this isn't what we'll be talking about all evening."

"So, do I hear wedding bells ringing anytime soon?" my mum chimed in.

My eyes widened again and I covered my face, "Mum, please stop." I turned to Ryan, "Do not take anything she says into consideration, please."

He turned to look at me, "I actually want to take what she said into consideration."

The table turned quiet and I looked around then back at him, "Huh?"

He smiled and kissed me, "I'm in love with you so if I don't take that into consideration then what the hell am I doing?"

I stared at him, "You love me?"

"I'm in love with you." he said.

******

I smiled at the thought, though it was not the most awesome way to say it. He still said it but the fact is that I was in love with him before he fell in love with me.

My phone rang and it was Susan and my heart's beat quickened, I was a hundred percent sure it was going to burst out of my heart in a matter of seconds.

I picked up the phone, "H-Hello?"

It was now or never.

"Diane?"

There was a period of silence before she spoke up again.

"She's blonde and I actually know her, I'm sure you do because she's a famous supermodel."

I couldn't control the tears rolling down my face, "Wait, you mean he's cheating on me?" She didn't say anything and that was all I needed before I broke down crying.

I'm ruined. I walked to the balcony and stared into space.

I didn't hear when the front door opened and when he came into the room. "Diane?" he called but I gave him no answer. He walked up to me. "Diane?" I turned to look at him without saying a word. "Are you okay?"

"Who's Rachel?" I asked as I turned back and looked at nothing.

His eyes widened, "What?"

"Who's Rachel?" I gripped the railings.

He ran his hand through his hair, "Fuck. Did she come here?" he mumbled.

"Who's Rachel?"

"Diane, it's nothing serious. I'm not in love with her." he said carefully.

"So, you slept with her?"

He didn't say anything.

"Did you?" I asked quietly. He nodded as he walked back into the room. I stepped over the railings as his back was turned to me.

"Diane, I swear it-"

He turned and saw me standing on the railings and he shot towards me screaming but it was too late.