This Is Worth The Pain

His lips curved downward into a shaky frown.

“What?” He repeated. It hurt to look into his hurting eyes. I blinked a few times feeling a tear being shed, slowly sliding down my cut up cheek. I didn’t want to say it again.

“You heard me.” I whispered, biting my lip softly trying to not look at his face. I couldn’t do it, not now. I wasn’t capable of doing it. My heart was so torn at the moment, my head rushing through memories and things all over my bottom. Pain was still there, in my body, especially my heart. It felt like it was literally shattering in my chest. I tried to ignore it, but when the hand holding mine clamped down tightly I had to look up.

“You don’t mean that.” He whispered.

“I do.” I mumbled back catching his sadness filled eyes. His reaction came immediately.

“No.” I responded just as quickly,

“Yes.” In a matter of seconds my hand was dropped and a loud crashing noise erupted through the room. My head snapped to what was in front of me. A hospital chair had been thrown against the wall and left an indent.

“Don’t do this to me Izzy!” He yelled. I cringed at the anger and pain in his voice as it rang through my hurting head. “I love you!” The door swung open and a man in white came in.

“Sir, you need to leave!” Kale threw his hands out to push the man I assumed was my doctor.

“Get away from me! I’m not leaving her here!” He looked at me desperately. “I love her. I can’t leave her.” His voice calmed to a whisper. Tears fell rapidly down from his eyes, his hair messed up crazily and his hands shaking uncontrollably.

I didn’t know what to do. The scene in front of me was scaring me. I couldn’t love him. What he did to me, everything he did to me! It was all a stupid lie from the beginning.

“How the hell do you expect me to believe you now after the things you’ve done to me? Every little one!” I hissed through clenched teeth. “Just get out Kale. I don’t want to deal with your lying ass right now!” Every word left my lips dripping with venom. The doctor tried once again grabbing Kale’s arm, but he pushed him off. “I hate you! I absolutely hate you!”

“You’ll regret this Izzy! God help you because you’re going to regret this.” He snapped back. Then with another push he sent the doctor to the floor and a nurse out of the way as he ran from the room.

I knew what was happening was bad. I knew Kale too well to know he wouldn’t take his word back. He had just made a challenge that I wouldn’t be able to get away from. The first bet he didn’t stop until last night, or so I thought last night, when it all came out in front of him. Showing me every little lie that was created.

“Izzy!” I heard my name being cried and when I looked up I had never been so happy to see my mother and father than at that moment, the moment I broke down realizing what had just happened.

The guy I had fallen head over heels for, the guy I loved, I had just told that I didn’t love him and never wanted to see him again. Even worse, I told him I hated him…

*******************************************

“I’m so glad you’re okay.” Ash muttered into my hair. I nodded holding back the tears I wanted so badly to let fall.

“Me too.” I lied. I wasn’t okay, I was possibly in the worst position in the world and nobody knew it.

“Candi said she’s be stopping by when school ended and Greg would be coming with her.” I nodded. I needed my best friends at the moment. It wasn’t one I could just open up with to my parents who I hadn’t seen in forever and my brother. I loved Ash, but he just wouldn’t get a girl’s mind like Cee would.

“Okay.” We sat in a silence for a little while. It was a comfortable silence, but knowing Ash he wouldn’t stay quiet for long.

“So, this is one way to get out of school.” He joked. I frowned. “Sorry, trying to make a conversation.” I stared at the white sheets covering my body understanding what he was trying to do, but it wasn’t helping much.

“Yeah whoo.” I said sarcastically. “So much more fun laying in a hospital bed with your brother.” He chuckled.

“You love me.” He teased. I grinned softly.

“That’s only because I have to.” I teased back.

A soft knock on the door made Ash get off the bed with me and say, “Come in.” I had thought it would be another nurse to check something, but when I noticed the familiar black and red hair I turned onto my side, looking away.

“Hey.” Zeke said casually. “How’s she doing?” Like she didn’t know; bullshit! Zeke knew everything.

“Okay, at the moment trying to get composed though.” Ash didn’t mention Kale storming out after him and I freaked out, but I sensed she already knew. Zeke had a weird relationship with Kale and she knew everything before either of us did sometimes.

“Gotcha, well I just wanted to check in since I saw the crash on the news and they had just left the restaurant.” I closed my eyes tightly remembering all too well.

"Izzy it's ok." Zeke told me, resting a hand on my shoulder.

"I don't know what's going on and quite frankly I'd like to know." I said brushing her hand off of me.

"Hun it's not something I can tell you." My heart dropped when those words were said.

"What do you mean?" Zeke looked uncomfortable as she took a step towards the mirror next to mine.

"Nothing, forget I said anything." I was not one to forget so I turned to face her and demanded an explanation.

"I'm not going to forget anything. I'd like to know what's going on right now." Zeke looked down for a second before making eye contact with me.

"He never ended the bet Izzy. You're still just a game to him."

“Get out.” Ash and Zeke stopped talking, turning to look at me.

“What?” Ash asked.

“Get out.” I muttered louder, opening my eyes to stare directly at Zeke. I tried hard to push the memory away, but my mind was refusing to let me push things aside anymore. It wasn’t going to let me just be pushed around by anyone. Zeke stared me down silently, but then nodded and turned.

“I’m glad you’re awake.” was all she muttered as she walked out and the door shut behind her. I let out a sigh and rolled back over to see Ash frowning at me.

“What?” I asked. He shook his head.

“She was just being nice Iz.” I rolled my eyes.

“You know nothing about Zeke.” I mumbled to myself, but he overheard.

“Does it have to do with Kale?” Ash asked, his words cutting into me.

Didn’t everything have to do with him?

*******************************************

“Oh my love! You’re awake!” I opened my eyes, waking from my sleep to see Cee, running in happily.

“I was sleeping.” I mumbled causing Greg to laugh who came in the door without running. Candi grabbed me through and pulled me into a big hug.

“You scared the shit out of me Isabella Rein.” She said, tightening the hug. I gasped for air, catching Greg who was still chuckling. I glared and he stopped for a second to tell Cee to get off of me.

“Come on Cee, she just woke up and you’re going to knock her out again if you don’t let her breathe.” Candi gasped, dropping me.

“I’m so sorry! I totally forgot. Did I hurt you?” She asked pulling back and checking me out. I laughed, which turned into coughing quickly.

“No. I’m. Fine.” I managed between coughs. She frowned.

“Liar.” I rolled my eyes.

“Whatever.” I smiled though. I hadn’t seen either of them in a while, well not really, but it was nice to see them again. Especially after everything that happened.

“Do you want to talk about it?” Candi asked. I thought about it for a moment before shaking my head.

“Not right now, just tell me about your day.” Cee didn’t need another push on that subject because she dove right in and I listened to every detail, laughing occasionally at the things she had said or done throughout the day. Every once in a while Greg would send me a frown or something as I pushed Cee on, making her talk. I know he wanted to know what happened, but I didn’t think I was ready yet.

“That’s enough about me though.” Candi said, finally ending her rant. “Greg, you want to go?” She asked, turning around to look at him. He just shrugged.

“Nothing much, I was distracted most of the day.” He said looking straight at me. I had a feeling it was because of me too.

“Well, I could talk about my date I have tomorrow with Barney.” I suddenly burst out laughing making Candi frown. “What?” She asked. I couldn’t help it. I knew it was stupid, but really? A kid named Barney?

“Is he a purple dinosaur?” Greg asked, obviously as amused as I was with the smirk all over his face. Cee groaned.

“No!” She answered, glaring at him. I kept laughing.

“Does he like kids?” I laughed even harder making my system go overboard and I started into another coughing fit.

“Stop joking around Greg, you’re going to kill her!” Cee yelled, patting my back softly to try and help with the terrible cough.

“Are you alright dear?” A nurse asked, coming into the room. I nodded, controlling my breathing again.

“Yes.” I wheezed. She gave me a tiny smile, nodded and then left.

“Shouldn’t you be finding something to wear?” Greg joked. Candi scowled.

“No, I can wait and make sure my best friend is alright first.” She told him.

“I bet he’d like you in purple.” I joked, winking at Greg. Cee moaned.

“You guys are unbelievable!” We both snickered.

“But you love us!” We said in unison.