Running With Wolves

The day was a slow haze of sadness and tears and I remembered little of it aside from seeing my Moma, the note she left me, and Lukas. I was thankful that no one seemed to want to hang around in curiosity at the orphaned Wolfe siblings. Mankato had personally escorted Viktor back to the board lines but I had no idea, nor could I bring myself to care, about the whereabouts of Knoll and Rune.

Lukas and I walked quietly side-by-side; close enough to touch without fully extending our arms. I knew questions were swarming around his head but I knew he’d wouldn’t voice them now—another thing I was thankful for.
I wasn’t sure where we were headed, I was too busy lost in my head, until I found myself in the backyard of my old house.

I could see Lukas studying me out of the corner of my eye.

“You want to go in?”

Not really.

“Sure,” I mumbled stepping forward and taking the lead, the note still clutched in my hand.

Lukas fell into step beside me as I opened the back door, voices filling our ears.

I could pick each one out as we moved with an eerie silence through the house; yet even in our silence I knew each person in this house knew we were here—well, except for Mia.

“So you’re actually from West Blackwood then?”

Mia.

“Yeah,” he mumbled. “I’m only here for the day though.”

Knoll.

“You shouldn’t be here at all.”

Jasmine.

“Yeah cause you have so much of a right to be.” Knoll snapped back.

The blatant annoyance surprised me a little, Knoll had never been known for his open opinion. I could feel the static in the room before I even reached the living room. As soon as we came into the room every pair of eyes was on us.

“Sage-”

“Lukas-”

Knoll and Jasmine opened their mouths at the same time and by the looks on their faces I didn’t care to know what they had to say at the moment.

“No,” I grumbled shaking my head tiredly. “I don’t want to hear it.”

“But-“

“I don’t care. I don’t give a fuck about anything right now so whatever it is it doesn’t matter.” I informed blatantly then mumbled in an afterthought, “In the end nothing really matters does it?”

Rune seemed to float across the room as she came to stand beside me with her head on my shoulder quietly; I really wish she’d stop Running so damn much.

“Sage?”

“I’m fine,” I rested my head atop hers in a silent convey of comfort and security.

I turned to Mia then when I noticed an absent figure, “Where’s Conan?”

“Tying up loose ends with some of the guests at the funeral home.” She stated. “He said he’d be back soon.” Her gaze flickered to Lukas and it dawned on me then that she’d never actually met him before. Hell, it’d been years since we’d even been seen together.

“Oh, um, Mia this is Lukas, Luke this is my good friend Mia from New York.”

Cordially Lukas reached out his hand from my side and shook hers. “It’s nice to meet you, unfortunate it could not have been under better circumstances.”

“Likewise.” She nodded, her gaze flickered to me and she offered a soft reassuring smile.

The paper cut along the inside of index finger then and the reminder of the seemingly innocent object suddenly felt like I was carrying a hundred pound time bomb. Lukas sensed my unease and his hand instinctively went to my back, his body subtly twisting in my direction in a sign of protection.

“Come up stairs,” He nodded toward the stairs and lightly pulled me in that direction. We both know I could have fought him but I didn’t. I let him drag me away from the living room that suddenly felt too crowded and I was thankful for it.

I had spent little time within my room these past two weeks, mostly to hide from the memories that haunted me here—as they did everywhere.
My room consisted of peach walls with black window frames, bookcases, and a black headboard of my bed. It was nothing spectacular, nothing special, and I had appreciated the simplicity of it. I drifted toward the window almost mindlessly and gazed out at the backyard wood line. She was out there somewhere, my baby sister was out there alone and scared and I was here, safe and warm.

“Sage,”

“Chey!” I yelled panic stricken.

Moma and Dad would kill me if I couldn’t find her. Off in the distance I could hear Seneca calling to our youngest sister. When I found her this girl was going to have a serious talking to about her ‘adventures’ through Falcon Ridge.

I can’t find her, Sage.

I could sense the distress in Seneca and it only made me panic further. If Seneca, level headed and always knows what to do, was panicked then I was freaked.

Lukas,

I reached for him with my mind like a child looking for comfort. I needed Lukas’ reassurance, I needed him to say we’d find her.

Easy, his words were like a lazy summer breeze She’s not far. Chey can’t be far, she wouldn’t wonder that far. You’ll find her, we’ll find her.

What if-

You Wolfe sisters, you’re are drawn to each other. You have an unbreakable bond, you always find your way to each other. Breathe babe we’ll find her.

“Cheyenne!” I yelled as loudly as I could, desperate to hear her.

Sage

Relief flooded me but before I could answer her with my mind I saw her running toward me.

I found her

The telepathic relief from Seneca and Lukas made us all dizzy.

“Chey!”

She slammed into me and we collapsed to the ground.

“Jesus Christ Cheyenne don’t ever do that again.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t mean to. I didn’t mean to go this deep, I didn’t realize we were out of Blackwood. I got turned around. I was so afraid you wouldn’t find me.”

“I’ll always find you Chey, I promise.” I assured hugging her tightly.

A twig snapped and suddenly Lukas was beside me, his arm around Cheyenne and I.

“Don’t ever do that again kid.”

“I’m not a kid.”

“You’re nine,” Luke stated flatly. “You’re a kid. You’re a kid who scared the living hell out of us.”

“I’m sorry.” She mumbled apologetically.

I’ve never been so scared in my life. In my thirteen years alive I’ve never been so terrified of loosing someone. The mere idea of loosing someone I loved shook me up.

Lukas touched his head to mine silently. A quiet more Were gesture of telling me he was there, that Cheyenne was safe, that we were all okay.

I was thankful for it.

“Sage,”

The touch on my shoulder snapped me from my memories but they brought tears to my eyes. What if I couldn’t find her? What If I couldn’t keep my promise to her? What if she died? What if Conan and I were all that was left? What if Conan died? What if I was alone?

“Sage, look at me.”

But I couldn’t move, I couldn’t look at him, I could barely hear the words leaving his lips. The weight of my Moma’s words pressed in on me.

…take those you trust, those you would love and protect, and leave Blackwood.

“Do you remember when Cheyenne was chasing that rabbit, determined to catch it and she got lost?”

His emotions vibrated off him. He was tired and exhausted, he was concerned and sad, and he was giving up and giving in to me. He lowered his head no longer looking at me and his shoulders slumped forward as he stared at a mark on the cream colored rug.

“Yes,” He sighed finally. “I remember.”

“I promised her Luke, I told her I’d always find her.”

He lifted his head then and I could feel his eyes on me more intensely then ever before.

“You’ll find her Sage.”

Of course he’d say that, he was trying to comfort me trying to snap me out of it. But what if I didn’t? What if I had to bury Cheyenne beside Seneca. I’d already lost over half my family was it so strange to imagine loosing the rest of them? Dad was gone, there was no one left to keep things from falling apart.

“Hey,” his voice grew hard then as he reached for my chin and made me look at him. His grey eyes were hard with determination and something else I couldn’t quite place. “You will find her. You’re Sage fucking Wolfe you do anything you put your mind to and I do not doubt for one minute that you will find her. You’ll find her and you’ll leaving a blazing trail of revenge against anyone who dared harm Cheyenne.” His eyes softened then, the determination was gone but patients filled his eyes. “You’ll find her Sagemint but you can’t save Chey until you save yourself.”

“What are you talking about?” I wondered shaking my head.

His hand moved from my chin to brush softly against my cheek. It was just the ghost of a touch, barely a moment between us but it was enough to stir something within me. “You have to heel your heart, hun. You have to fix all the shit that is messing you up in that beautiful bear trap mind of yours.” His finger trailed a path from my cheek to my jaw line. “You’re going to get through this Sage.” He murmured quietly. “I know you feel like your world is ending, like there isn’t any hope left for anything. They have a word for that and its called grief. It doesn’t last forever.”

I swallowed hard trying to push my way out of the haze I was in. “I feel like I’ve lost myself.” I admitted and I did. Standing there at my father’s funeral made it one hundred times more real then ever before. Before, he just wasn’t home, but the idea of him never coming home didn’t hit me until I gazed upon that casket. “I feel like I’m just floating around with no sense of direction like I’m not connected to anything. I’m just drifting around with nothing to hold onto.”

“You are connected to something and you do have something to hold onto.” He stated, his grey eyes were lowered to my lips as his thumb traced the sensitive skin. “You have me, you’ve always had me, and you always will.”

I could feel it coming, that intimate moment where you’re barely breathing and your lips almost touch and it sent my heart racing. Not in anticipation but in panic. I couldn’t do it, I wasn’t ready for the drama/love story marathon that was Lukas and I’s relationship. I couldn’t do it. I’d just buried my father; I had everyone we cared about in the living room. I just couldn’t do it.

“Luke,” I put my hands against his chest, feeling every muscle beneath that shirt ripple at my touch.

He stared at me with searing eyes and it made me squirm, him looking at me like that always made me squirm. He didn’t look at me like someone who wanted a kiss, he wasn’t even quite looking at me like someone who loved someone else. It was primal, it was Were. It was the look a Mate gave another Mate and I could barely breathe when he looked at me like that. That level of want, that level of adoration, of intimacy; it made my heart race and my lungs refused to expand. My entire body became a livewire when he gave me that look and when his hand fell over mine where it rested against his heart, I could feel his heart beneath my hand and every ridge of his finger print against the back of my hand.

A pot clattered below and I jumped startled but Luke hadn’t even registered the noise.

“Lukas,” I swallowed hard and pulled away from him, avoiding his gaze. “stop it.”

He broke away then taking several steps back, one hand in his pocket, the other in his hair. “Sorry,” he mumbled.

He hadn’t meant to come onto me and I knew that. It wasn’t exactly within his control. It was a Were thing but more than that it was Soulmate thing. It pulled you in, dragged you under, made you see nothing past the other person. It was things like that, feelings like that, that scared me sometimes.

I loved Lukas but to be that enraptured by him scared me.

Maybe I had intimacy issues.

Maybe I was being an idiot.

Either way I was walking toward the door and I wasn’t sure if Lukas and I would so much as look at each other for the rest of the night.